Lost Love Will Find Its Way
by RockinRockelle
Summary: It’s been three years since Marissa, Seth, Ryan and Summer graduated Harbor High. Three years since they have been the ‘fantastic four’ and three years since things even made the slightest bit of sense. And this is where our story begins…
1. Poof The Three Years vanished!

**Lost. Love Will Find Its Way.**

**By: Rushel**

(A/N: This is JUST the background and introduction to a new fic. The first post will be two months after the accident or 'tragedy' if you prefer. But the next post will pick up three years after. I hope you enjoy. Please let me know if it is worth pursing).

_Chapter 1: Poof- The Three Years vanished!_

It's been three years since Marissa, Seth, Ryan and Summer graduated Harbor High. Three years since they have been the 'fantastic four' and three years since things even made the slightest bit of sense. And this is where our story begins….

But before that, let's give a little history… Yes, three years ago Marissa was in a car accident, a horrific one, which in return changed life as we know it in the OC. Resulting from Volchok's vengeance, Marissa was almost murdered. Fortunately she survived, but not unscathed. For two and a half months, Marissa's slim and fragile frame lay in a hospital bed, in a deep healing sleep. Ryan, never leaving her side, was praying for the day to come that he would once again see the blues of her eyes again. A day that might not ever arrive…

_Two and a half months after graduation. _If Ryan had had his choice, he would have never left the side of the one and only girl he truly ever loved. He wanted and needed to be the first one she saw once she awoke. But as the summer months started to come to a close and more and more hope was lost, Sandy had used his lawyer's persuasive arguments and convinced Ryan that he should attend university. "It's what Marissa would want for you." Sandy had told him. Ryan agreed, but not with his entire heart. How could he live on if she was dying beside him? It was as if a huge part of him was laying there helpless. Marissa WAS a part of him, whether he wanted to admit it or not. But he knew deep down that Sandy was right. He was almost always right. The only thought that made him able to move forward, was the idea that once she was awake, he wanted to be strong for her, and well on his way to being the mature man she deserved. She was the one that had wanted to go away and 'mature.' But he couldn't help but ask; maybe he was the one that needed to. And so, with great hesitation Ryan packed his things, and spent a few days moving those possessions to Berkley. Classes were going to start the following Monday, which meant that Ryan still had the weekend to spend time with the quiescent Marissa.

Only being gone for a little less than a week was difficult enough on him, how was he going to spend weeks at a time away from her? These thoughts ran through his mind as he returned back to Newport. He skipped going home to let the Cohen's know that he had arrived safely and went straight to the hospital. Although he had made Kirsten promise to call him if there were any changes, he had this deep feeling in the pit of his gut, that maybe, just maybe he would return to a surprise.

A surprise was a bit of an understatement. As he raced through the long white halls, practically knocking over an evening nurse, he returned to Marissa's room with a glisten of hope in his own gorgeous blues. But before he even reached the door, he noticed something was different. _Where was her name?_ They usually had her name on the outside of the door. Catching his breath, he peeked his head inside the room first. But instead of finding her long frame engulfed in the white hospital sheets and a room full of flowers and cards, he saw nothing… nothing but an empty room and the setting sun shining in through the blinds, landing on a nicely made bed.

"Excuse me, are you Mr. Cohen?" a petite red haired nursed interrupted his daze.

Ryan immediately turned around and shook his head. "No, I uh… well he is my father."

The nurse nodded, remembered what the young, overbearing woman had instructed her. 'Not to give the letter to the young blonde haired boy, but ONLY to a Mr. Sandy Cohen.' But the woman was so rude to the nurse that she didn't care.

"Well this letter has been left for your father, could you see to it that he gets it?" And with that she handed him the envelope and began to walk out the door.

Ryan took the envelope from the woman, and studied the handwriting carefully. He looked back up, completely confused, and getting this utterly horrifying feeling that Marissa had… no it couldn't be, he pushed the thoughts immediately out of his head.

"Miss…" he began trembling as he spoke. "The girl that was here, Marissa Cooper… where is she?"

The nurse paused one more time, knowing it wasn't her place to say anything. "I believe everything is explained in the letter."

_About three hours earlier…_ Julie was sitting in the hospital room next to Marissa's bed reading the latest issue of Cosmopolitan. Neil and Summer had just been there, but had now gone home for the evening to fill their empty stomachs, shower and sleep. Probably for other things as well. She knew that the time everyone spent there was getting less frequent. Julie didn't blame them for not staying with her. It was depressing, and monotonous, especially with no changes in Marissa's state. The first few weeks after the accident, they, as in EVERYONE that cared about Marissa, were there practically every chance they got. The only person there more often than the others was Ryan. Who, much to Julie's protest, had convinced the nurses to let him stay the night on most occasions. But it had been nearly three months since the catastrophe, and a lot of her friends were trying desperately to resume their lives to normal; at least that was to the best of their ability.

Julie had been civil to Ryan for the most part, but only for the sake of Kirsten and Sandy. She tolerated him hanging around Marissa, but that was because she was still asleep. She had actually spoken to Sandy about talking to him, and getting him to go to school. She had been convincing enough to make Sandy believe it was for Ryan's own good, but really it was for her own as well. With him around, she never got any alone time with her daughter. But still, she didn't let that show, she remained well-mannered to him.

In the mean time it was ripping her apart inside. She knew that he hadn't solely caused the accident, but she couldn't help but wonder if her baby would still be laying there unconscious and completely helpless if he had never shown up to Newport to begin with. Things had changed drastically once Ryan arrived in Orange County; she had just wished that she could have protected Marissa from everything. She knew that she wasn't a saint either, and could finally admit that some of… ok a lot of the drama was caused by her. But deep down all she ever wanted was to provide for her family. So it was easier to put the blame on him.

Julie was lost in her thoughts, thumbing through the magazine and looking at the pictures, but not really paying attention to the content of the pages. She shifted in her chair, uncrossing her legs, and then crossing them the other way. Maybe it was the thought of having so much animosity towards Ryan that was making her uncomfortable, or maybe it was because she had been in the chair for over an hour. She looked up to the clock and saw that it was just about time for the doctor's to switch shifts. This gave her a bit of hope, maybe Dr. Shadrai would have news about Marissa's state. The last time they had talked, he had mentioned a new wing in a famous hospital in Italy that specialized in what Marissa would need if she ever woke up. He seemed pretty excited about the possibilities, but until she at least came to, it was really too dangerous to ship her anywhere.

Julie of course couldn't help but think that taking Marissa away would be a great thing for her. It is what Marissa wanted to do after graduation anyway, leave Newport. But this time Julie would be going with her, no arguments. And yet, she had the sticky feeling that most likely Marissa would never agree to it, not after what had happened.

Standing up, Julie tried to flatten out the creases in her pants while heading for the door, when suddenly she heard a slight murmur, barely audible.

"I have no one."

Julie stopped dead in her tracks and looked around to where the noise was coming from. "Marissa?" She gasped, and held her hand to her heart, immediately running over to her beloved daughter, and looking down to her pale face, to see if it came from her. Not that there was anyone else in the room to where the whisper could have come from, but Julie might have been dreaming… god was she dreaming?

"Marissa, honey, it's me… your mom."

She waited with great anticipation, as her heart seemed to be thrashing out of her chest. But the longer she waited, she saw that there was no movement. Her lips curled into a small frown and she sighed, placing her hand on Marissa's hand, and letting her head hang low.

"Julie, you are going crazy." She spoke to herself, really thinking that maybe she should go visit the psych ward down the hall.

Her entire body started to curl over, clearly she shouldn't have just gotten her hopes up. And just as she was about to give up and walk out, assuming she was just hearing things, she felt Marissa's fingers twitch. Immediately her eyes opened wide again, and she could see Marissa's eyes begin to flutter open.

Julie couldn't believe her eyes. Although she had always hoped for this moment, there was part of her that wasn't sure it would ever happen. She grew excited, and tears started to stream down her face.

"Marissa, oh my god, my Marissa…you're awake!" The rest of her words were muffled as she buried her head into Marissa's shoulder and spoke and cried into her hospital gown as she embraced her. If she would have stayed upright to see Marissa's face it would be one of complete confusion and fear.

"Mom.." she started weakly, and attempted to lift her hands, but they felt like logs attached to her thin body. "Mom, what is going on? Where am I?"

Slowly Julie rose back erect and looked down to her daughter, realizing she would be really scared and confused, seeing how two months had passed and she was asleep the entire time. What she didn't know was that to Marissa, it was a lot more than just two months. She didn't bother wiping the tears from her eyes or the mascara that was staining her cheeks. She just stood there and looked deep into her daughter's eyes.

"Marissa honey, you were in an accident… you… that stupid boy… he." Normally Julie always knew just what to say, but given the situation, she wasn't sure where to begin.

Marissa's memory finally started to come into focus. She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to recollect what had happened last. But it seemed like everything was clouded, and she searched long and hard before she had even a glimpse of the tragedy, her mistake. She reopened her eyes and saw her mom standing there sobbing and barely being able to stand.

"Mom… I… I didn't mean to hurt myself, I just." Marissa didn't know where to begin. All she could remember was trying to numb the pain… the pain of her parents getting a divorce, and the pain of the only guy she had ever been with cheating on her. "I just wanted to forget."

Julie stood there staring at her daughter with a dumbfounded look upon her elegant face. For some reason, although she was pale, and it was obvious her body was weak, Marissa seemed to have some sort of innocence in her eyes. It seemed as if Julie was looking into the eyes of a much younger version of Marissa.

"Marissa…" she spoke her name again, saying it as much as she could, due to the fact that she hadn't spoke it for so long. "Sweetie, what are you talking about?"

It was now Marissa's turn to start to cry. She was so confused. What WAS she talking about? She wasn't even sure she knew. And her brain seemed so murky and unclear. She tried wiping away her tears, but they kept coming.

"I just took those pills because I wanted it to stop hurting, and I thought that….that…." she couldn't finish her sentence.

Julie wasn't sure what was going on, but seeing the look on Marissa's face made her realize that something was terribly wrong, even more wrong than being asleep for two months. She sat down on the edge of the bed, and wrapped her arms around her once again, stroking her hair, and trying to calm her.

"Shh Marissa, its ok… it's going to be ok." She sat there rocking back and fourth slightly, letting Marissa cry onto her shoulder, and still letting a few tears of her own continue to escape from her eyes. She looked around the room trying to make sense of what was going on, did Marisa mean that she had taken pills before she had gotten into Ryan's car? But why? None of it was making sense.

Marissa was now trembling, and it was as if she were dealing with everything for the first time again. And yet, this time around she didn't clam up, she let it all out. She pulled back from her Mom's embrace and looked her in the eye, fury written across her face. She hadn't even told her that they were getting a divorce… why didn't either of them tell her?

"Why didn't you tell me mom!" She almost screamed. "I left for TJ, and Dad had to tell me over the phone!"

Just then it hit Julie, Marissa wasn't talking about the accident, she was talking about Tijuana… she was reliving three years ago.

"Marissa!" She was shocked by her sudden outburst, but before any more dialogue could be spoken, Dr. Shadrai and a few nurses came flying through the doors, all shocked to see Marissa was awake. And before Julie knew it, she was being dragged out into the hall so that they could examine her daughter.

She sat there for a few moments, having to take solace in the nearest chair she could find. Lowering herself slowly, her eyes were open wide. Taking it all in, and realizing that for some reason Marissa had forgotten the last three years. Why would Marissa have blocked out the last three years? What did this mean for them?

Julie's thoughts were running rampant now at what this predestined. The doctor spent a good hour in the room with Marissa, and although Julie wanted to be back in there, it gave her time to think things through. Finally, Dr. Shadrai came out with a huge smile upon his face.

"Mrs. Cooper-Nichol." He began, moving to the chair beside her. "I have good and bad news…"

He then continued to tell Julie that Marissa was physically doing really well. Her body appeared to heal a great deal while in her slumber, and now that she was awake they could perform better tests on her. But the bad news was, for some reason she was experiencing a rare case of amnesia. It didn't appear to be complete amnesia, because she would remember her name and all of her family. But this selective amnesia made her believe that she was still in high school… three years ago.

After a series of questions with her, asking her what she remembered, he came to the conclusion that for some reason, Marissa's mind had blocked out the last three years due to something horrific. He wasn't sure why, and he was ready to run some more tests, to get to the bottom of the trauma. Marissa had been so confused and hysterical that they had to sedate her until they found out more.

And although Julie already knew what the doctor was telling her, a smile came to her face as he confirmed it. Dr. Shadrai then started to give her a list of possibilities of where they could go from there, how Marissa may not ever regain that memory back if her mind wouldn't let her. But with the right therapy miracles could happen. He continued on, starting to go over their options, and asking Julie who she wanted to call to tell them the news. But before he could finish, Julie shook her head 'no' and interrupted him mid sentence.

"I want to take her to Italy…." She paused for a moment, and looked back into the old man's eyes. "Immediately."


	2. The Separate Lives

_Chapter Two: The Separate Lives_

It was a late Sunday afternoon, or at least it was when the gorgeous blonde haired, blue eyed girl started out. She had been sitting outside at a small café for a few hours, her long, thin frame slouched over a cool drink and her legs stretched out in front of her. Now as she sat scribbling away in an old leather bound journal, the warm setting sun of pinks, oranges, yellows and even magentas mixed together to create one of the most beautiful sunsets there ever was. The wind softly blew some of her hair around in her eyes, so that she was forced to pause mid sentence to move them aside. It was as if mother nature was trying to tell her to look up and enjoy this moment. And so she did. Pushing the stray strands of hair behind her ears, she looked up and took in a deep breath. It was absolutely beautiful, amazing really. And as she sat there and stared at it she couldn't help but think that although it was the same sun, the one that warmed not only here but Newport as well, it seemed so different in Formello.

She looked around herself and set her pen down in the journal to hold her place, closing it for a brief second, to really take in the setting. She sat back in her chair, closing her eyes for a moment and letting the sun heat her freckled face. She had lived here for the last three years. And although the majority of her life she had resided in Newport, this is where she would now consider her home She was much more comfortable here, knowing that at least she remembered all of it.

Still in the silence of the setting sun, for a moment Marissa squinted her closed eyes even harder. Someone passing by would just think that she was straining due to the brightness of the rays. But that wasn't the case at all. Instead, she was trying once again, just like she did multiple times ever day for the past three years, to remember what her last few years in Newport were like. Any time she had a lull in a conversation, was taking a break from her studies, or just wasn't thinking about anything else, she thought of that. It was constantly hanging over her, almost as if she couldn't function properly without figuring it out. The first year after she awoke, she spent most of her time in therapy upon therapy sessions, trying to figure out just what the cause of her memory loss was. According to Julie, the doctors here were the best of the best, but even they couldn't make sense of it all. So sooner or later they were labeling her a lost cause. But although the doctors had long given up on figuring it out, Marissa spent at least a little bit of each day still trying on her own.

And this time, just like every other time, her mind was blank, and she grew frustrated once again. The only thing she could remember was her life up until right before her sophomore year at Harbor. So what was she like for the rest of her time there? Her mother informed her that she had graduated from Harbor with flying colors, was still social chair, and had her life pretty well put together. But what she didn't understand was what had gotten her that far? Because that day, the last that she remembered, when she took all those pills in Mexico was that she wasn't sure she could live on. She would have done anything to forget the pain. She felt so lost then, and in her eyes, she had no one. So she knew that there were many events that led up the accident, to make her the person that she was now, but she just couldn't remember them. Something just didn't seem right.

She sighed in utter irritation. No matter how much time has passed, Marissa still couldn't get over that three years of her life were taken from her. Why couldn't she remember? The doctors told her that there was a reason she was blocking it out. But Julie had told her as much as she knew, and out of all the events that happened in those years that were lost she couldn't think of any reason why she would selectively not remember them. Still at the same time, her doctors instructed her to focus on her life now. Even if she can't remember it, her past was her past, and what was important was her future. What better reason to move on, then the fact that you can't remember the past? Julie even joked that sometimes she wished she could forget her past. Marissa didn't find the joke very humorous.

She finally reopened her eyes, and after her pupils adjusted to the brightness of the sun, they focused on a group of young men across the street. It was a very familiar scene to her. It seemed that as the summer sun was going down in Formello, was the time when many of the people her age emerged. The group that she was watching seemed so content. They were simply shooting the breeze and catching up on the previous nights adventures. A couple of them were on their mopeds, parked on the side of the street, while the other two emerged from their houses. She saw as the group laughed and smiled at a joke that was just made. Though they were speaking in Italian, and Marissa only caught a few things here and there, their laughter was contagious and it made her smile.

This was one of her favorite spots and she came there almost on a daily basis. Because of this, she knew all of the men by name now, and even created a bit of a friendship with a couple of them. This in itself was comforting; she knew she had developed a life in Italy. But she knew it just wasn't the same. Even though they had easily befriended the 'American Girl' and made her feel very welcome it couldn't compare to what they had with each other. This group of guys had known each other all their lives. Three of the five attended university, one of them up in the northern part of the country, the other two right near by in Rome. While the other two opted not to attend University at all;, choosing to start their lives right out by working. And though they all decided to go their separate ways, and the difference among them was quite evident, they still shared a common link, a true friendship. To Marissa, it was obvious that the group remained very close. She longed for something like that, a group that just knew her so well, no matter how far apart they were, they would still be the 'group'. But she knew deep down, the chances of that were not possible anymore, and she had to come to terms that it was something she knew she could never have. How could she be close to people she couldn't even remember?

She sighed softly and moved her attention back to her journal. She opened it back up and continued writing…

"…_so back to the dream. It's weird, I really haven't had one of them for awhile now. At least not for the past few months or so. But suddenly, out of the blue last night I had one again. This one was just the same as all the others. I was in a white truck. But this time instead of driving it, I was sitting in the passenger side. Every time I have the dream something changes in it slightly, and yet the outcome is still the same… a crash. I can't help but think that it was real…I mean it feels so real, and I know that its real but it's nothing like the way Mom explained it to me. As I looked over to see who was driving, I would expect to have seen Summer, or maybe even Holly or Luke, but none of them were there. Instead, I looked over and saw that kid Ryan. I remember smiling to him, as if he was the one that had always been there all along. I don't really remember why I was talking to him, or where we were driving. But it felt good, as if we really knew each other. Even though I was scared out of my mind, when I looked to him and saw his shining blue eyes staring back into mine I had this sense of comfort. It's weird when you dream of people you aren't really even close to. I mean, why would Ryan, someone I haven't really spoken to in six years, make an appearance in my dream? Maybe it was because the last thing my mind seems to recollect is TJ, and he was there. And just like all the others, the dream seemed so real. Maybe my brain is just making things up now, you know fake memories in hopes of finding a real one. I know its mixing reality with some warped version that my head has made up. I just wish I knew why I was drinking and driving that night. What was I escaping from this time? Maybe if I knew, then I could remember some of the other things as well. But I can't ask her, the only person that might know. And we all know why. Was I always such a mess? I know mom says she is telling me all she knows, but something still seems off. Especially the part about Summer sleeping with my boyfriend… I think she is keeping something from me… "_

Just as Marissa was going to dive into more of her thoughts she was interrupted by the ring of her cell phone. She looked at the caller ID and saw that it read "Julie". _Speak of the devil_, she thought and shook her head as she flipped her cell phone open.

"You're late." Marissa stated and looked at her wrist for her watch. It wasn't in a negative tone really, it was almost as if it were expected, but she still was annoyed.

"I know sweetie, I'm still in the city. Joseppi and I just spent the most amazing time by the Trevi Fountain. You know, there is a reason why they use that scene in so many romantic movies, its enchanting…" Julie spoke in a very satisfied tone. To her, everything had fallen into place, and there was no reason not to be happy.

But before she could continue, Marissa cut her off. "Mom, can't you tell me all about it when you get here? I'm starving."

Julie frowned slightly, thinking to herself. Even though her daughter didn't remember all they had been through in those three years that drove them apart, she still seemed to have some sort of attitude towards her like she had. But she couldn't possible remember, if she did she wouldn't be talking to her now.

"Well actually sweetie that is what I was going to talk to you about." She started. "I bumped into Bray this morning at the restaurant. He said something about meeting you for dinner around 8:00, and to not rush home."

Julie paused for a moment, waiting to hear a reaction from Marissa. But when she didn't, it was her chance to continue on. " Marissa I really like this one, I do hope you don't mess it up with him."

"MOM!" Marissa grew even more agitated. "How could I possibly mess it up with him?" She took a deep breath, and although she was frustrated with her mom for trying to run her love life, she couldn't help but grin and get excited at the thought of seeing Bray.

Julie laughed lightly, Marissa did have a point, if there was one thing that Julie was sure of, it was Bray's infatuation with her daughter. "Ok, ok honey, well I might just stay with Joe tonight, so feel free to have Bray sleep over. I will see you in the morning. Don't forget…."

Marissa couldn't help but blush slightly at the comment her mom made about Bray staying over. And just then, as if on cue she looked up to see the tall, light brown haired boy, with a body that would make any girl look twice, approach her. As he shaded her from the sun, she could see his gorgeous, well defined facial structure. He had these dark brown eyes that she seemed to always get lost in. But the strong arms that he had would always 'find her.' And his lips… with that slightly crooked smile made her melt each time. But he wasn't overly built, more of a swimmer physique, which was just right for Marissa's slender frame.

She smiled to him, and held up her finger to let him know to wait just one moment. "I know, we have a doctor's appointment in the morning." Marissa interrupted. "Surprisingly I can't forget about _them_."

Julie sat on the other end of the line, feeling guilty for just a brief moment. She knew how hard it was for Marissa to not be able to remember her past. But Julie knew that it was for her own good. And so the guilt quickly faded as she again justified her actions in her head.

Marissa began to smile as Bray rolled his eyes a bit and she had to look away so she could finish her conversation with her mom without laughing. As she did Bray stood there, folding his arms across his chest with a playfully smirk on his full lips. Watching his girlfriend, he was completely in awe of her beauty as the sun started to fade behind the horizon, casting an angelic shadow on her face. "Ok Mom, I have to go." She tried to cut her off from her now apparent ramblings. And with that she hung up the phone.

"Good evening love, you look terrific." Spoken with a thick English accent he greeted her. And without waiting for Marissa to stand to welcome him, Bray leaned down, kissing both sides of her cheek and then finally her lips.

Marissa only smiled, returning his affection by closing her eyes and returning the kiss softly. As she pulled back she smiled widely and stood to embrace him tightly. "Buonasera."

On the other side of the Atlantic things didn't quite paint as pretty of a picture as they did in Formello. In fact, by the look upon Seth Cohen's face one would think that the Nana had passed away or something. Usually the brooding was left to Ryan, but this time his brother seemed to have him easily beat. And although it was only about 2 in the afternoon, it seemed to be much later. The skies were cloud covered and grey, and the silence in the room was eerie.

He sat there on the edge of the queen sized bed that he shared with his girlfriend, and watched as things were strewn across the room in attempts for Summer to organize them. Three very oversized suite cases were open and lay upon the bed next to Seth, and he ran his finger back and forth across the side of the smaller one.

Finally he broke the silence. "I really don't know why you would rather spend your summer in boring Europe, when you could be living up your last real vacation with the likes of your very sexy, extremely talented boyfriend." Seth tried once more to talk Summer out of leaving.

But when Summer Robert's had her mind made up, she was really not one to argue with. No matter how much Seth pleaded with her to 'not leave him behind for two entire months,' Summer knew what she had to do. It was what she had wanted to do for the last three years.

From in the closet, Summer could be heard shouting. "It's not our last vacation Cohen. Stop being such a drama queen."

Just then you could see a piece of clothing fly out of the closet and Summer continued to speak. "We'll have Chrismukkah break, AND spring break, not to mention all of our long weekends. Besides we all know that even after I graduate you'll find some way to drag me to some comic book convention or something."

Although it was unseen by Summer, Seth rolled his eyes and flopped down onto the bed, staring at the familiar patterns the ceiling made. "But why do you have to go there Summer? Why not just Tijuana or even San Francisco to see Ryan?" He pouted. "I don't think either of us can go two entire months without a lil something something from our lovin lovins."

His attempts at humor didn't crack Summer, and she emerged from the closet with the last handful of clothes to pack.

"Cohen!" She ran over, and threw her clothes on top of one of the bags. "Stop putting your grubby paws all over my new Louis Vuitton cruiser bag. You just had pizza!" With that she leaned over and swatted his hand away that had been tracing the side of the bag.

Once her bag was free of icky Cohen germs, she resumed packing and spoke with conviction. "First of all, eeeew. TJ was so high school, I think we both know that I am much to mature to party with the roughyings. What kind of vacation is that anyway?"

Seth turned his head to watch his girlfriend, and opened his mouth to speak a rebuttal. But all he got out was a 'bu' before Summer continued on. "And secondly we can visit San Francisco any time we want, Ryan lives there. This is a chance of a lifetime Cohen."

Seth just shook his head and laughed. "Chance of a lifetime Summer? Your dad has been taking you to Europe since you were eight years old. I still remember the first time you set foot on the Champs Elysees. You talked about it at recess for like a WEEK." He was exasperated, and he knew the real reason why she was going, she just wouldn't admit it. "And you brought a beret back for show and tell."

Summer paused in putting her last pair of shoes in the side pocket and thought about what he had just said as if trying to remember the moment he was talking about. "Cohen that was the second grade!" She laughed and moved to sit on the edge of the bed next to him. "I remember crying when Luke stole that stupid hat from me and played with it like a Frisbee. It got stuck in a tree and Marissa and I were too scared to climb it to get it."

Seth sat up next to his girlfriend, and sheepishly rubbed his legs. "It was a tough tree to climb…" He began. "After you all went to play on the jungle gym, I tried to go get it for you. You know to impress you with my tree climbing skills. But when I got about half way, one of the branches gave way, and I fell."

Summer's eyes grew wide at the thought of a young lanky Seth frying through the air. She tried to hold in her laughter and Seth continued the story. "Lucky for me, there were a lot of branches to break my fall. I should know, I hit every one on the way down." He looked away in shame. "I had to leave school early that day, but I don't think that anyone noticed."

Summer's eyes softened, which Seth never saw because he looked away. Part of her felt awful for the life Seth led before she knew him. But at the same time as she saw her boyfriend's vulnerability she had take the opportunity to poke fun. "We had recess together?"

Seth turned to her, a mock gasp escaping his lips and he held his hand to his heart. "Way to twist the knife Summer!"

Summer just laughed, leaned over to kiss him lightly on the cheek, and then got up to continue packing. "We are going to be fine Seth. Besides we have been inseparable for the last … well it's going on a decade now. You already got the chance to sail away. In fact you even shacked up with Luke for an entire summer. So now it's my turn to spread my wings and be on my own for awhile. It's the last chance I've got; after this year I'll be going to Med School, and…"

Seth interrupted and spoke above her words. "And by 'spread your wings', you mean lots of shopping and drinking espresso, and NOT shacking up with any guy named Luke… or Jacque, or Antoine right?"

Summer laughed, realizing just how insecure Seth could really be. She knew that this would be the first time they were really apart in a very long time, and she couldn't help but think it might just be good for them. "Well at least it's not some Vegas prostitute or Southern Belle who wants the whipped cream licked off her body!"

"Touché." Was all Seth could mumble, and he realized that he really didn't have much room to talk. With as many times as he had messed up, he couldn't complain even if she did. This worried him, because god he hoped she wouldn't decide to pay him back for all those times.

"Shouldn't you be packing anyway? This room is a mess, and your plane for Newport leaves in just a few hours." Summer said as she put all her weight down on one of her overstuffed bags, attempting to zip it up.

"No, there really isn't much to pack. Captain Oats needs to be sedated for the flight, he gets all uptight and skittery when we fly. But other than him, I'll just cram some stuff in the ONE bag you left me. Besides, if I forget anything I'll just make Mom and Dad go buy me some more." Seth stated simply.

He and Summer shared an apartment year round in Rhode Island, which housed most of their things. But they still had their rooms back in their respective parents' houses, full of enough stuff for a second home.

"Oh my gosh, I can't believe I almost forgot her!" Summer ran over to the nightstand where Princess Sparkles and Captain Oats sat side by side. "She would have never forgiven me, if I left her for the entire summer with just you and Oats to take care of her." She played with her hair a bit, and then placed her gently in the other side pocket of her carry on, leaving her head peaked out to breathe.

"Well Cohen, I think that's it. Are you ready to drive me to the airport?" Summer asked as Seth groaned.

He couldn't take it anymore, he bounced out of bed like he was just challenged to a fierce ninja game on the PS2, and grabbed Summer by the shoulders. "Summer you aren't going to find her ok!"

Summer looked at him, pretending to be puzzled. She knew that Seth was smart, and he would figure out what her real purpose was in going to Europe. Still with her rambles about having to live on her own for a change, explore the world, shop until she dropped…you know everything she dreamed about before taking the plunge into the real word, she thought would be convincing enough. Still, the uneasy tension of him knowing was always there, the just had never actually talked about it.

"You don't know that Seth." She began, trying to pull away, and grab her things, but Seth was being pretty persistent and held on tightly to her.

"Even if you do Summer, she won't remember you… she doesn't remember anything. Julie said that…" He was trying desperately to convince her, and this time, although it was extremely rare, it was not for selfish reasons. He didn't want Summer to travel half way across the world just to find that her best friend didn't remember her. It would break her heart.

But again, Summer interrupted. "She's lying!" She bursted out, but then realized what she had done. She continued on, but her speech must softer. "Look Cohen, I have done all the research. Even if Marissa does have complete amnesia, the way for her to get better is NOT to be in a foreign surrounding. She needs to be surrounded by the people who love her, and who will help trigger her memories."

Seth shook his head, knowing that for the last three years, there was a reason why Summer got so into the art of medicine. He took a deep breath and crossed his arms over his flat chest.

"I just think that Julie is holding her there captive. And if I find her, she … she just might remember me. Maybe I'll spark something in her and I'l… I'll have my best friend back." A small solitaire tear blinked out of Summer's eye, and Seth's heart broke.

"Summer…" he reached up to wipe the tear away with his thumb and comfort her. "Julie has done a lot of bad things in the past, but do you really think that she would want to keep her daughter from remembering her past?" And without Summer even answering his question, Seth realized that Julie Cooper was very capable of something like that.

"I still don't think that you should go Summer, you don't even know where she is. And Europe is a big continent."

"I know she is in Italy Cohen." She looked up to him, the determinedness shown in her eyes. The puzzled look upon his face made Summer explain further. "I've snooped around in your father's den, and I found a letter from Julie… it was post marked from Italy ….she took her to Italy."

Seth just wasn't sure what to say anymore. He knew that no matter what she said, she would have an excuse for it. And though he didn't want her to go, deep down he couldn't help but hope she was right; maybe she would find her, and things would work out. He couldn't blame her for being so affected by it all, let alone so determined in fixing the situation. In fact she handled it much better than Seth would have. It was too easy to be reminded about how he took off on a boat when Ryan left for Chino. And that was only an hour away, it was nothing like this.

"Well look at you. My girlfriend is just your regular Nancy Drew." He tried to lighten the topic slightly, so that it would bring a smile to her face. He rubbed her shoulders and smiled softly. He took a deep breath, and finally realized that she needed to do this.

Finally giving in he spoke. "Ok Summer, I understand why you want to… no, have to go. But maybe I should go with you? I mean Italy is still a big country, and I just happened to win the 'Compass Award' in my boy scout troop."

"Cohen, you were fifteen, and it was maze for nine year olds." She laughed and lay her head in his chest, while wrapping her arms around him. "Besides I'll be fine, and I want to face Julie Cooper by myself."

As the two stood there hugging, a thought came to Seth's head. "This so could be my next story line in Atomic County." His voice suddenly changes to what he called his announcer voice. "Will Little Miss Vixen be able to save Cosmogirl from the spell her evil mother has put on her? She faces her toughest battle yet… the fight against …against… Ice Ruby? The Bomb Shell Adulteress? Cosmo Woman? … no the Fire Mistress! Damn I'm losing my touch…"

Just then Seth could feel a hard whack against the back of his head and he looked to see that an angry Summer had just hit him. "OUCH Summer!"

Summer just shook her head and rolled her eyes, the sweet moment now ruined. "You are NOT going to use our personal lives for your stupid comic book Cohen."

"Graphic novel." He corrected in a soft whisper while rubbing the back of his head in pain. Luckily Summer didn't know, but he already had the sketches started for Cosmogirl losing her memory.

Just then Summer took one last deep breath and her rage blackout was shortened. "I'm going to miss you and your Coheny ways Cohen." And before Seth could complain about his headache or for her bipolar emotions, it was quickly forgotten when Summer pressed her small body against his. He wrapped his arms around her once more, and they hugged tightly.

"It will only be a couple of months Summer… and you know what they say about absence making the heart grow fonder." Now instead of fighting with her, he attempted to comfort her. And yet, he wasn't quite sure how, seeing how he knew that he was feeling like he couldn't go two months without her. "And besides, I have always wanted to try the whole phone sex thing."

Summer leaned back and gave him a glare worthy of Ryan, and he backed off with an uncomfortable laugh. "Right, one rage black out is enough for this hour…man Ryan would be so proud of you."

He hugged her once more, trying to savor their last moments together, and Summer spoke one more time. "Don't tell him ok?"

"What that your glares are getting scarier than his?"

Summer laughed. "No, that I'm going to try to find Marissa… I just don't want to get his hopes up. You know, what if I don't find her, or worse, what if…." She stops mid sentence, not even wanting to voice the idea that she was wrong, and Marissa would never know them again.

Seth sensed how uncomfortable she was and just held her tighter. "Don't worry, I won't tell him. Now let's get you to the airport before you miss your flight."


	3. The Attempts to move on

_Chapter Three:_ _The Attempts to move on._

Ryan looked around the nearly bare room while holding an oversized cardboard box. The walls were a plain white except for the few brownish black smudges that were here and there, probably some sort of furniture markings. He looked down briefly to the plain colored, beige carpet which had a few spots that were a little too worn in for most people's taste. There were only a couple of other boxes currently in the room, and strewn in random corners as well as a lone full sized bed, undressed and bare. Just like everything else in the room, it too was white.

For a moment the scene reminded him of so many he saw as a child. After his dad was taken to prison, he, his mother, and Trey never stayed in one place for very long. So seeing empty rooms with boxes was something he remembered a bit too well. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to block out the memories. They were so long ago and yet still so vivid in his mind. _'But this is different'_, he reminded himself. He wasn't moving out because they had missed rent again, or to get away from his mom's latest abusive boyfriend. He was moving out of the dorms and into his very first real apartment.

Shaking his head and telling himself to get a move on, he moved over to the far side of the room and placed the box that read, "Izzy's" scribbled across the sides of it, on top of another box just like it. He then turned and headed back for another trip. Just as he walked out of the bedroom he saw a stack of three smaller boxes on top of each other floating towards him. He laughed and jogged over to them.

"Izzy, what are you doing?" He chuckled and reached out, taking the three boxes from the struggling girl. Once he pulled them out of her arms it revealed a very determined yet flustered looking young woman. She was about average height; a whole 5 foot 4 inches tall. Her long, dark, naturally curly hair was pulled up in a lose knot on top of her head, with only a few tendrils escaping, causing them to fly every which way. The highlights in her hair were now hidden from being pulled back to her head. She was a pretty girl, but nothing out of the ordinary. Her intense hazel green eyes and full pinkish lips were two of her best qualities, aside from her hair. And she wasn't super thin. Not overweight by any means, but she definitely had curves.

As Ryan took the boxes from her arms she instructed him on what to do with them. "They are all for the bedroom. I thought they were light by themselves, so I thought I should take them all..." She paused and watched him disappear back into the other room. "I should have given up half way up the stairs when I almost dropped them twice, but what can I say I was driven!" She yelled out to him, as she bent over to retie her shoelace.

"Try stubborn." Ryan emerged back out of the bedroom with his infamous half smirk.

Isabella stood up and put her hands on her hips and gave him a look. "I am not stubborn Ryan Atwood." She said in an even, non defensive tone. He just looked at her, the smirk still very present on his well defined face, and at the same time moving a bit closer. He stopped about a half of a foot away and raised an eyebrow. But instead of teasing her more, his blue orbs looked her up and down, and a smile fell across his lips. Her once stern look slowly started to melt away and finally she shook her head. "Ok maybe a little, but it's really what you like about me."

His look lightened a bit and he cocked his head to the side, as if he were pondering the thought. He took a deep breath, and spoke as he came to a conclusion. "And here I thought it was because you let me cheat off you in Intro to psych freshman year."

"Well that too of course." She winked and turned around, headed back down for another box or two, completely unaware of the deep blue eyes still staring at her with desire. And just as she reached out for the door knob, she felt him grab her hand. She turned around to face him, wondering if he needed her for something. But as soon as her eyes met his, she knew it wasn't for anything involving the move.

"Ryan... we have to finish this. Your parents are going to be here in a few hours to help us paint and spruce it up. I promised that..."

But before she could finish, Ryan interrupted her. He pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her body to his own. The temperature in the room immediately went up, and Isabella had to take a deep breath.

"Exactly, Sandy and Kirsten should be here in just about 60 minutes, which means we really don't have all that much time." With that he leaned in, and placed a very delicate yet well planned out kiss right below her ear lobe. He knew it was the spot she couldn't say no to. And just as he predicted, as his warm lips touched her soft skin, Ryan could feel Isabella squirm slightly.

"Ryan," she began to protest. I want to at least have all the boxes up here, so that when they arrive all they need to do is help us unpack."

However, he wasn't listening because now he was the 'driven man'. He wasn't sure what it was about the way Isabella was dressed today. It was simple and comfortable. But seeing her in those short cloth red shorts and plain black tank top, that was just tight enough to show her curves, gave him the sudden urge to christen the new place.

"Don't worry about that Izz... Kirsten... and Sandy... live for this stuff." He spoke in between assaulting her neck line with his lips. And then he pulled back to look in her eyes. "Something about how they haven't really gotten to experience something like this since moving into the McMansion. And more about how a mail truck didn't really count."

He stood there trying to make sense of what all that means, but gave up after only a few seconds, with a more important agenda. "Seriously, if they don't get to help, they will be severely disappointed. Seth probably won't completely move out until he is at least 30, and they want to be a part of my 'first home'."

Ryan laughed at the thoughts of his family's personalities, and how they all seemed to fit together to make the most loving group of people he had ever known. But although they were loving they were definitely unique. Sandy's self righteous remarks, Kirsten's stern yet loving in their own way, non sentences and demands, and Seth's... well Seth's, 'Cohenisms' as Summer would put it; they all seemed to be exactly what Ryan needed in his life to make it seem ironically normal.

Bringing his thoughts back to the moment at hand, Ryan looked back to the girl before him and used his hands to rub up and down her sides through her shirt. He gave her a pleading look which only caused her to laugh more.

Isabella playfully pushed him away, but it was no use. She knew that she could never be able to truly refuse him. Who could? And so as she walked away from him, acting as if she were in fact rejecting him, she made her way into the bedroom, knowing full well that he would follow. And just as she had guessed he went in after her.

"You know Ryan, I think that we should repaint these walls... white is just so…" As she turned around to see if he was near her, instead of finding his voice she was met with his lips crashing into hers. The kiss was so full of passion and strength that she began to lose her balance. Ryan only took advantage of this and used his muscular chest to push a little harder, causing her to fall back onto the sheetless bed. When their lips broke for a moment to gasp for air, Isabella laughed. "Better make it quick, the last thing I want is for your parents to catch us in the act."

Although Ryan stopped kissing her, he was already working on pushing his hands up the side of her tank top, the material he once liked seeing on her, now only in his way. Her soft, smooth skin, felt amazing to his slightly rough hands. His look got really serious, as if he were afraid of that actually happening. "Well then you better stop talking then." And with that, their lips pressed together once more. But this time it wasn't a 'crash', it was still strong and passionate, but much more designed and deliberate. The kiss only broke one more time so that Ryan could pull back and take the tank top off of his girlfriend, revealing her full breasts restricted in a black lacey bra.

She then returned the favor by pulling his t-shirt over his head, and throwing it on the floor. As their kissing resumed once again, and their bodies pressed together, Isabella couldn't help but think that she was the most fortunate person in the world. Every time they kissed… every time they made love, it was as if nothing else mattered. She was head over heals in love with this boy. She had been ever since she first spoke with him second semester, freshman year in that psychology class. She knew the moment her green eyes met his blue ones, that she was done for.

And every time he kissed her the way he was kissing her now, when their tongues danced together in unison to massage each other, so full of fervor and desire, it reminded her of that very first time. It was mid way spring semester of their sophomore year. And just when she was about to give up on him in the romantic sense, he surprised her with an intense kiss. She had liked him for over a year, but after getting to know him she realized that he had a shaded past. It wasn't just her, she knew that very well. He didn't date anyone for over a year and a half. And she couldn't understand why? He was gorgeous, incredibly sweet, and intelligent and fun. But no matter how many girls threw themselves at him, he remained celibate.

So they became fast friends instead, the sexual tension building between them in the mean time. And although she wanted more, and with all the hints she gave him, he never budged. And later rather than sooner, she realized that maybe they were just meant to be friends. She knew he was a good guy, and even thought that maybe he liked her in more than just a friendly way; but she also knew that he wasn't ready for what she wanted. And so for a year they remained merely friends, until that warm spring day when everything changed.

It was as if he had finally let go of something. She never did know what it was that he was letting go of; Ryan was never one to reveal his thoughts. But it didn't matter to her. What mattered was that he finally did, and he gave them a chance. And although she knew deep down, almost another year later, she still didn't own his entire heart. _Maybe she never would?_ But they were moving in with each other, which to her was a huge step. And for now she was satisfied with what she did have. She couldn't help but hope, that maybe her love would be enough for the both of them. And that sooner or later he would love her back the same way she did him.

Sandy and Kirsten pulled up with the car they had rented from the airport, in front of the apartment complex in which Ryan was moving into. Sandy sat there staring at the old white building with a bit of a goofy grin upon his face. Meanwhile Kirsten was sitting in the passenger side, looking back and forth between the mapquest directions she had scribbled on a piece of paper in front of her and the building itself.

"Are you sure this is the right place Sandy?" She didn't want to say it, but it wasn't exactly what she was hoping for, for her adopted son. But she really didn't need for him to answer her. She knew this was the place; it had Ryan written all over it. And as she got out of the car and stood up, she saw a sign that to confirm her thoughts that read _"University Park North Apartments."_ She made a bit of a face, wishing that Ryan would change his mind and allow her and Sandy to help him with rent so that he could afford a nicer place.

But of course he refused, and for that, Sandy was deeply proud of him. He finally joined Kirsten in getting out of the car, his smile never fading. It was like he was 21 again, and getting his very first apartment. He closed the door quickly, and waited for Kirsten to join him on his side of the car.

"It's a bit run down." Kirsten stated the obvious.

"It's perfect." Sandy looked to Kirsten with that same grin. When she gave him a scowl all he did was shrug as if to say, 'what?'

Sandy reached out and took Kirsten's hand, leading her, no guiding her carefully up the front walk to the building. The looks on their faces couldn't be more different. She was hesitant, but he was ecstatic! Not only that Ryan was getting a new place, but that he was doing it completely on his own. Ryan told them that he had decided to put away and save the money that he and Kirsten had given him for room and board for something more important down the line. Sandy had no clue that Ryan intended to pay back every cent, and was only keeping it now in case of emergencies. He was determined to make it on his own. Call it Atwood pride, or whatever. He didn't care; he needed to do this right. He had taken so much from them already, and he couldn't wait to pay them back.

And to Sandy, this only meant that Ryan was really experiencing the true college encounter. Sandy didn't have any sort of trust fund when he went to college, and he was proud of Ryan for following in his footsteps.

As they reached the front door Kirsten spoke again. "Sandy, you realize that him moving into this apartment means that we have lost him for good. No more coming home for the summer, no more picking him up from the airport for spring break. We will be lucky if we see him for Thanksgiving and Chrismukkah." She paused in her over exaggerated thoughts, having mixed emotions of him living here. Sure she was proud, what mother wouldn't be? But she wanted the best for her kids. And to her the 'best' meant a McMansion down the road from their own. "And look at this place? Is it even safe?"

Sandy laughed at his wife. He knew that she was overreacting, and couldn't wait to tell her so. He opened his mouth to speak, but just as he did, Ryan interrupted him.

"Safer than a mail truck." He smiled wide at seeing his parents in front of him, and moved through the entrance way to hug them both tightly. He had just made his last trip up the stairs with the boxes, and saw them pull in from his window on the third floor.

As his parents turned from their discussion to look at him they smiled. He had grown up a lot in the last three years, and Kirsten would be the first to notice. But he would never be afraid to admit how much he loved these two people. It was part of the reason why he worked so hard. He wanted to make them proud.

"Hey kid!" Sandy began as Ryan hugged Kirsten first. And then when Ryan turned to hug him as well, Sandy continued. "Nice digs you've got here, you have done well for yourself."

"Sandy, don't say digs." Kirsten instructed, and when she saw two of the three most important men in her life embrace one another, a small tear fell from the corner of her eye. But of course it would be the last one she let fall. She would never hear the end of it otherwise. Thank goodness Seth wasn't here. She quickly wiped it away before they could notice and laughed at herself.

"So we are here to help! Put us to work already." Sandy said excitedly. He couldn't wait to see his place and relive his own Berkley days.

"Sandy is a bit anxious. He never did live in San Francisco for an entire summer. So you've got one up on him." Kirsten teased him as they moved inside and towards the stairwell.

"Oh but honey, if we had stayed in Berkley, think of all the adventures we would have missed out on?" Sandy made his own point.

"I don't think that riding a mail truck from Canada to Mexico, living with a bunch of hippies and pissing off my father is quite the adventure I had expected."

"But you loved every minute of it." Sandy cooed and Ryan just laughed as he led them up the semi clean stairs and down the hall to apartment number 333.

Kirsten just shook her head, remembering the days, and the summer that Sandy proposed to her. She would never admit it to him, but it was probably the best summer of her life. "So Ryan, what job did you decide on for the summer? And did Isabella ever find one?"

Ryan opened the door and stepped inside, letting his parents follow after him. "I'm going to take that internship. The one I turned down last summer at DCG Architects."

He began to speak, but before he could finish, Isabella, now completely dressed moved inside the living room with a smile. "They practically begged him to take it. He has the top marks in his class." She spoke of him proudly and then continued. "And I'm going to be working at a non profit drop in center for troubled teens. The pay isn't the best, but I'll love it, and Ryan and I will probably both get second jobs to make up for the difference."

Kirsten smiled widely as she saw Isabella move towards them, and welcomed her with a hug of her own. As the two women embraced, Sandy turned to his son. "A second job? You really are a Cohen, the Nana will be proud."

Ryan smiled a bit and shrugged his shoulders. "I figure the more I can make this summer, the less I have to worry about it once school starts. My friend Eli got me this job at a popular bar down town. With the money we save from the summer, I should be able to just keep that job once classes start again. That way I will be able to focus on my senior seminar and hopefully graduate."

"With honors." Izzy spoke up once again, and moved to hug Sandy as well.

"It seems someone is quite proud of you kid." Sandy laughed and hugged Isabella back warmly. "That makes three of us."

Ryan just laughed and shook his head slightly. He was never one to brag, but he had worked really hard the last three years to always make the dean's list. At first it was in part due to Sandy's point that Marissa would want Ryan to make the best of his life. But as more and more time passed, and less and less hope remained that Marissa would ever return, he used it as a distraction to keep other things from entering his mind. Thoughts of leaving school to fly off to Europe, despite Julie's instructions to stay away. And most recently he realized that he needed to do this for himself. He wanted a good life for himself, and he knew those years ago, Sandy was right… if he worked hard maybe it could happen; it was the one thing he had control over.

After a bit of small talk, and catching up between the two couples, it was time to get to work. The four of them spent the rest of the afternoon painting walls, unpacking boxes and sorting through things. A few times Ryan would pause to watch the interaction between his girlfriend and his parents. He was glad that Sandy and Kirsten liked Izzy so much because he did too. It definitely assured him that he made the right choice in finally 'moving on' from Marissa. Isabella was an amazing person, and Ryan cared for her deeply. Yes, he knew he had made the correct decision. But then why did it still hurt so much sometimes? He shook away the thoughts. Maybe he felt guilty for never going to Europe to find Marissa. He knew he shouldn't, the last thing he wanted was to damage things more. And that is what Julie told them would happen if Marissa saw them. He couldn't do that to her, no matter how much it hurt not seeing her. Still, something seemed off. He just couldn't figure out what.

And yet, for the most part, Ryan was happy now. Despite the nightmares he continued to have on a nightly basis, reliving the accident over and over again, Ryan was really content. At least that is what he told himself. There was no reason why he shouldn't be. He had a great girlfriend, he did well in all his classes, and now he was moving into his very first apartment. Something he never even dreamed of having. His life was so different from what it was three years ago, and even MORE different from three years before that. He couldn't even begin to imagine what the next three years could bring. And to be honest, he tried to stop guessing. If he didn't try to predict things, to hope for things, then he couldn't be disappointed or hurt anymore right?

He turned back to painting the wall in the living room, and at the same time Kirsten had turned and noticed the look in his eyes. The look he always seemed to get when he was off in a far away place… anywhere but the present. She turned to Sandy to see if he had noticed it too, but he was busy talking with Isabella about her plans to some day open a Teen Center of her own back in Buffalo, her home town.

Sandy and Kirsten had gotten to know Isabella quite a bit over the last 2 and ½ years. She was the first and only friend Ryan brought home on break. Being from New York, it was a long way to go home for just a long weekend, and Ryan would often offer for her to come stay with them so that she didn't have to stay on campus alone. They saw her infatuation with Ryan from the start. But it wasn't until Sandy pointed it out to Ryan that he ever responded to it. They definitely liked the girl. Especially Sandy, seeing how she too was from the East Coast, shared a lot of the same passions, and couldn't help but laugh along with him at the Newpises. She was sweet, and all that mattered to Sandy and Kirsten was that she made Ryan happy. Was he happy? He appeared to be, but sometimes they still wondered.

A few hours later as the San Francisco sun set on the four of them, Sandy and Kirsten were officially wiped out and sprawled across the antique green couch that Izzy said she had gotten from a yard sale. Most of the apartment was unpacked and things were put in their appropriate places. The walls were drying, and Ryan was off in the other room ordering Thai food. It was a vast improvement that was for sure. And now, Isabella sat on the floor, cross legged and going through a couple of random boxes that had yet to be unpacked, Sandy was practically snoring, and Kirsten was picking light blue paint out of her blonde locks.

"Food is ordered, it will be here in 20 minutes." Ryan interjected and moved into the room, plopping down in a random beige plush chair, that didn't match the couch whatsoever.

Sandy looked to Ryan with another smile, but this time it was definitely mixed in with a little bit of a yawn. "I wonder if we can convince Seth to stay away too! You would think that he and Summer didn't have their own apartment as much as he comes home."

"SANDY COHEN!" Kirsten suddenly seemed very awake, and couldn't resist the urge to swat him on the shoulder.

"Ow honey, watch the arm, its sore from painting." Sandy made a face and rubbed his arm.

Ryan and Isabella looked at each other and then burst out laughing. Ryan couldn't help but think how much Sandy reminded him of Seth right then and there. And if Kirsten wasn't careful, she would rival Summer with her very own rage blackout.

"Sandy, losing one son is good enough! If Seth wants to come home every chance he gets, he is more than welcome." Kirsten couldn't help it, at this moment in time, she didn't care that the son that once vowed that he would never set foot in sunny Newport again, came home all of the time. She wouldn't apologize, she missed her boys.

Just as Sandy was going to open his mouth to state that he was only kidding, fearing that if he didn't he might be in the dog house, Isabella opened up a smaller box and spoke out loud. "What's this?"

The other three in the room looked back to the girl sitting on the floor as she pulled out a 2006 Harbor High Yearbook. Ryan immediately shot out of his chair, and took the box out from in front of her and with his free hand took the yearbook back.

Isabella was a bit shocked by his abrupt actions, and her eyes widened. For the first time she read on the side of the box, written in a familiar scribble "Ryan's/ private." She looked from the box, to Ryan, and then to Sandy and Kirsten. Ryan stood there, a bit too defensively and laughed uncomfortably, realizing how he just acted.

"It's just old stuff from high school." He tried to cover up, then paused and looked around. Immediately Sandy and Kirsten exchanged glances, but Isabella sat staring, asking with her eyes for more of an explanation. "Well you know, just year books, my diploma, some pictures, stuff like that." Ryan set the box down, folded the corners so that it closed and moved to the hallway closet, putting it on the top shelf.

Isabella looked confused beyond anything. She didn't understand what had just happened. Why did Ryan not want her to see his old things? Then again, she was a girl, and her dorm room walls were covered with pictures and collages of her high school friends, and even past boyfriends. And although she recognized the differences between the way men and women cherished their memorabilia, she suddenly she felt really uncomfortable, and tried to figure out why Ryan acted so weird.

Now with nothing in front of her, she brought her folded knees up to her chest, and tried to stick a knife through the thick silence that had suddenly filled the room, "Really? Do you have any goofy pictures of Seth? I would love to see what the two of you looked like back in the day."

Ryan stood still and speechless. He really didn't want to get into everything right now; to have to explain why he didn't like to think about that period of his life. It wasn't that Ryan hadn't told Isabella about his 'friends' from Newport. Seth, Summer, Luke, Sadie, Marissa… she even knew about the accident. Though, not just how much Marissa had actually meant to him. He had left a lot of the details out. And when it came to his past, he tried to keep as much of it as possible to just the facts, leaving out the emotions. He knew he couldn't date a girl for a year and a half and not talk about his past, but he did a pretty damn good job of allowing only certain things to surface.

He shifted his weight, and rubbed the back of his neck. Why couldn't someone save him? This would be a perfect opportunity for Sandy to interject with a witty remark, or even Kirsten to come up with a memory from the past to laugh about. But the room remained quiet, all looking to Ryan for him to say something. But he didn't have to, Isabella spoke again.

"I mean it would be fun to hang some of your old photos up on the walls. It will give our apartment some warmth… my old pictures, your old ones, and the new ones we have of us and our friends together." She bit at her lower lip nervously. She could sense the sudden tension, and although she didn't know completely what caused it, she hated to see Ryan uncomfortable.

"Sure, I'll uh... I'll find one later." Luckily that seemed to satisfy the group, and the subject was changed to something else by Kirsten. As the food arrived, and the evening turned into night, the four of them continued to talk, laugh and enjoy one another's company. The awkward moment not forgotten, but at least unspoken. Everyone seemed to move along, but for Ryan, it was hard for him to really interact. His thoughts were now elsewhere.

Isabella noticed, but she faked it well. She continued on with Sandy and Kirsten, with a smile that never left her face. She just wished that Ryan would open up to her more, 'I could help him,' she thought. But she knew that he wouldn't do it until he was ready. If there was one thing she learned in her Psych classes, it was that no one would talk unless they wanted to, and forcing them would only hurt the relationship and trust that was established. So she remained patient, she just didn't know how much longer she would be able to.

The evening came to a close when all the Thai boxes were left empty, there were paper plates strewn throughout the living room, and all four persons were lounging around, stomachs full and trying desperately to keep their eyes open. Sandy looked at his watch and spoke to Kirsten. "Well honey, we should probably go find that hotel that we booked. I'm exhausted!" He stood up and yawned obnoxiously, which was Ryan and Isabella's cue to get up.

Kirsten slowly stood as well. She made a slight face, realizing that their time together was much too short. "I am so sorry we can't stay another day, but Seth is supposed to fly in tomorrow afternoon." She reached out to hug Isabella first, as Ryan hugged Sandy.

Sandy chimed in as they switched partners to hug the other kid. "And if we aren't there when he gets there, there will surely be no food left in the house." They all laughed, and they all pulled back with smiles, making a square between them. "Seriously, you would think Summer never fed him!"

And with that, the few exchanged a few more words and said their goodbyes. Kirsten on cue, shed a few tears, knowing she was far too tired to try to stop their flow. And of course she made Ryan promise he would come home soon to visit. And after one last hug, the door was shut and the young coupled remained.

"You ready for bed?" Ryan asked Isabella, wrapping his arm around her, and leading her towards the living room to clean up. They spent the next five minutes in silence as they cleared the trash and headed towards their new bedroom.

Isabella had wanted to say something a few times. Now that they were alone, maybe he would open up to her. She sought to find out what he was actually feeling and what had caused him to react the way he did. But as she watched him, she could see in his actions, and the way that he avoided her eyes, that all he wanted to do was go to bed. And so she waited, once more. Once inside the bedroom, she suddenly felt a mixture of anxious and excited feelings. They had spent the night together so many times before, but never in _their_ apartment. Suddenly she couldn't wait to cuddle up next to him. They were far too tired to do much else, but that is all she needed. And as if reading her mind, skipping getting into their pajamas, all they did was peel off their outer layer of clothes and crawled into the newly made bed in just their underwear.

Without any more words spoken, Ryan put his arms her, and Isabella rested her head on his chest. Within minutes she was sleeping soundly, curled up next to him. And although Ryan was equally fatigued, he just couldn't sleep yet. He waited for a few more minutes, making sure that her breathing was even and deep. And as soon as he knew that she was truly asleep, he slipped out from underneath her and moved towards the living room.

Clad only in his boxers, Ryan opened up the closet and took out the box he had taken from Isabella earlier. Moving to the couch in the dim light, his body cast a shadow caused by the single light coming from the kitchen. He sat down, and put the box next to him on the couch. Hesitating for a moment he turned and opened it up, taking a deep breath to prepare himself.

The first thing he had pulled out was his senior year book. He hadn't been able to look at it since that first summer after graduation. It brought back too many memories and until now he wasn't ready to open up yet. Slowly flipping it open to the front cover he began to read some of the words his friends wrote to him. First was Seth's, and it only made him laugh softly as he read his rambles that took up almost the entire front cover, leaving only a small space for Summer to sign a blurb and her name. He missed both of them that was for sure.

He continued to flip through the black and white pages, looking over some of his old classmates that he had almost forgotten. It seemed like so long ago. And then as he turned the page, he felt as if his heart had stopped. There on one of the candid pages was a picture of him and Marissa at the college sweatshirt bonfire. He ran his thumb over the smooth page where Marissa's sweatshirt was pictured. The words read "Berkley" just like his did. And for the first time in a really long time, Ryan had to fight back a tear that had formed in the corner of his eye.

He quickly turned all the pages, leaving it to the back cover of the yearbook. And there it was, what Marissa had written to him. He only read the first line...

"_Ryan,_

_It seems so surreal that we have finally graduated. Who knows what the future holds. Knowing our past, it can only be full of excitement..."_

Ryan quickly shut the book, creating a brief wind to blow his blonde bangs away from his red eyes. He couldn't read the rest, not now… maybe ever. He swallowed, feeling the huge frog that had formed in his throat. Why did he even come out here?

He set the yearbook back in the box, knowing that he couldn't look at any more things to reveal the memories. As he pulled his hand away, it ran against something hard. He grabbed what had scratched his hand and pulled out a small 5 x 7 frame of him and Marissa. It was a very familiar picture of the two of them on the pier. They looked so young, and the innocence in their eyes showed that they hadn't been through much yet. He smiled to himself and pondered briefly doing what Isabella had suggested, and putting it up somewhere in the apartment. But he knew he couldn't… he shouldn't.

So instead, Ryan rummaged through the box until he found a loose picture of the fab four from one of the many Newpise events. He didn't even know where the picture had come from. And from the looks of it, none of them realized the picture was even being taken. Ryan, who was on the end of the picture, looked incredibly uncomfortable in his penguin suit as he tried to straighten his tie. Summer who was next to Ryan, had an annoyed look on her face as she stared at Seth with the early signs of a rage blackout. While Seth was sporting his infamous Jew fro next to her with a goofy grin comparable to Sandy's. And then Ryan looked to other end of the picture. It was Marissa's profile, as she wore one of the most gorgeous smiles he had ever seen. Her eyes were lit up, and she wore a priceless expression. She was obviously amused by her three best friends as she turned to watch them. It was a brief moment in their history and yet it seemed to capture so much. He closed his eyes for a moment and let out a deep breath. When his eye lids opened, Ryan's eyes softened and he took the picture, putting it in the same frame of him and Marissa, covering the pier picture up.

He knew that he couldn't get away with not putting up any of his pictures from his past, or Isabella would always wonder why. So he stood up, moved over to one of the end tables next to the couch, and placed the picture in the center of it. That would do… for now. Taking a deep breath, and knowing that that was about as much emotion as he could take for the night. He returned to the box, closed it back up, and returned it to the closet; where it would remain untouched for a very long time.


	4. The Arrival

_Chapter 4: The arrival._

Frustrated and tired, a visibly very depleted and disheveled Summer Roberts steps off the train and into the busy city streets. "Ugggh, a train is so not the fastest way to get anywhere." She spoke out loud but to no one in particular. Yes, Summer was speaking to herself. It was as if she had to speak to hear someone familiar, even if it was just her own voice. For the first time in a very long time, Summer was absolutely 100 alone. Yet, although she was lonely, she was still determined, and she hadn't lost hope. She took a step away from the train and hesitated to move on. She was unsure of where to begin.

After traveling through three other cities, she was now in Rome, the nation's capital. Her logic wasn't necessarily the most brilliant, but other than the letter, she had no other leads to go with. Besides, to her it was at least a well thought out plan. And seeing how it was Julie Cooper who she was trying to track down, she figured she could eliminate some things. For one, Julie most likely wouldn't reside in a small town out in the country some where. Although it may be smart if you are trying to hide someone, she knew that Julie wouldn't be able to live too far away from shopping and rich city men. The second clue to go by was that according to Julie's letter that Summer had read and memorized years ago, she was taking Marissa to a famous hospital. She had done her research and picked out the top cities she thought would fit the description. Starting from the north, she began in Milan, then made way to Venice. After coming up empty in both places she took a train to Florence, only to find no signs of the Cooper girls there either. She spent about a week in each city, never leaving a hotel or hospital unsearched; and when she was sure they were no where to be found is when she moved on.

So now, she was here in Rome. Honestly, she thought it might be the most obvious place to start, being the most populated city in Italy and all. The only reason she hadn't started there to begin with was she figured Julie would probably be a bit smarter than being so obvious.

If she was wrong once again, and couldn't find them in Rome, she would make her way to Naples and then start to hit the smaller places looking for rich men. But she prayed to God that she was right; she was staring to lose patience. Each day that passed where she didn't see a glimpse of her best friend, she became a little less optimistic. And yet she was still unwavering in her quest to press forward. If she lost her focus, then it would become too easy to give up. And giving up just wasn't in Summer's vocabulary.

Taking a much needed deep breath, Summer took in the sights of the heart of Rome. The train had dropped her off in what seemed like the dead center of the city. Natives and tourists dodged around her in quick step, trying to make it to their destinations. Summer was tired, and she needed a rest. This wasn't just a vacation after all. She was just glad she had convinced her dad that it was. She knew that once he saw his credit card bill, he would figure it all out and ask her to come home. So she calculated that she had a couple more weeks before reaching that point.

She looked around for a few moments taking in yet another gorgeous city. The architecture alone was remarkable and she made note to take some pictures to send to Ryan. Putting one of her bags over her shoulder along with her purse, she pulled the other two on wheels along behind her. She paused for a moment looking for the piece of paper where she had her hotel information written upon. Finally, she found it and smiled with relief. Just as she began to step off the curb to hail a taxi she was shoved backwards by a man rushing by. Without notice she was falling into her bags and landing with a huge thud upon the hard stone sidewalk. It all happened so suddenly, she had no idea what had hit her. All she knew was that now she was lying in the middle of three Louis Vitton bags and a Gucci purse which now had its contents spread throughout the streets.

"Merda! Mi dispiace…. Mi dispiace!"

Summer had no chance to look up. She felt like her tailbone had just busted in half and the throbbing pain ran through her entire body. And yet she was more concerned with he contents of her purse spilled throughout the sidewalk for the entire world to see. There it was, Credit cards, euros, dollars, her cell phone, not to mention lip gloss and tampons. She momentarily left her bags askew and bent down to retrieve her items. But, when she did the young man in front of her bent down to do the same thing. Their foreheads bonked with great force into one another and Summer fell back again, moaning.

"Ugggh! What the hell assface? Haven't you done enough?"

Holding his hand to his head the young Italian man stepped back and grunted. He started mumbling something under his breath in his native tongue, but continued to bend down and pick up her things, thrusting them into her purse. It appeared he knew exactly what she had just said and was quite offended by her lack of appreciation. Once he was done putting the last tampon in, which to Summer's surprise didn't faze him one iota, he handed her the bag and finally looked her in the eye.

"Per quel che mi riguarda…." He began to tell her off, explaining to her that he was merely trying to help and apologize for knocking her over in the first place but stopped mid sentence. He stood there silent, and his angered face suddenly changed into a smirk. "Sei bellissima!" He smiled to her and shook his head.

Summer stood there for a moment, and accepted the purse back. Her Italian was far from good, in fact it was pretty much non existent, but she was pretty sure he had just given her a compliment. "I eat pizza WITH pepperoni…" She began to explain, and when the young man made an extremely confused look, wondering if he had run into someone psychotic, she laughed and explained further. "I'm American, speak in English please."

The young man appeared to be about Summer's age. He was similar to Seth's build, extremely thin and tall, though he wasn't _quite_ as soaring as him and a little less lanky. He was wearing light colored (almost white) form fitting Armani jeans, which Summer recognized from the newest Armani line. On top he was wearing a dark brown button down shirt which had two ultra thin baby blue stripes on either side of the buttons . The shirt also hugged his slender frame tightly and the bottom few buttons were left open, exposing a sliver of his midriff. The outfit was topped off with a brown belt and what looked like to be designer driving shoes. At first he just stood there and stared at Summer until she shook her head and laughed at him.

"Hello, are you alive? Oh wait, maybe you don't speak English, I'm sorry, I just…" Summer laughed at herself and began to gather up her things. Now she felt like an idiot. Here she was thinking that he did speak English, and he didn't understand her at all.

Just when she was about to put the one bag back onto her shoulder and walk away in shame, the young man spoke up. "I am sorry miss, I was just trying to state that you are… how do they say it?... fabulous!" His accent was thick, but his English was easily understood.

Summer looked back up into his eyes, noticing for the first time that they were a unique green/blue with an oddly mysterious yellow ring around the center of them. They were gorgeous and she was intrigued by them. Then she realized she was staring and shook her head in a laugh. At his words she couldn't help but beam, completely forgetting that this was the same man that caused her to bruise her behind. "Well aren't you the charmer?" she giggled lightly. "Apology accepted."

The young man smiled back at her and started to help with her other two bags. "I am sorry I pummeled you over. I was turning that bend there, and wasn't paying attention. See, my skinny ass is late for work, and it's not the first time this week."

Summer immediately stopped what she was doing, looked up and interrupted him. "If you are late for work, you don't need to help me. I mean, really you have done enough, I'm gonna have a bruise on my ass worse than that time Cohen and I... well never mind." She stopped herself and then smiled. "Really, please go, I don't want you to be late."

The young man just shook his head and smiled. "I may be a flaming finocchio, but I still know how to be a gentleman!" And with that he took the bag from her and smiled. "Besides I'm already late. It's best to be really late and come up with some outrageous story rather than just be a few minutes past the clock."

Summer had no idea what a flaming finocchio was, but she let it pass by, figuring it was a crazy European term. She let him take her bags and then he stopped realizing he didn't really know where he was going or what he was doing with them. He continued to speak, very animated, and Summer was sure that if his hands were free they would be moving around as fast as his mouth.

""I'll tell them I was helping a pour American damsel in distress. Joe can't punish me for that, I mean he himself fancies the Americans." He stopped and turned around and then tilted his head with a laugh. "Where are you going anyway?"

Summer couldn't help but burst out laughing at his mannerisms and rambles. He was quite the character, and for the first time since she had arrived in Italy she felt like maybe she had found a friend. "I was actually trying to hail a cab. My hotel is the..." She paused to look down at the piece of paper, but the boy came over to take it from her to read it himself.

"You're staying at the Via della Stazione di S. Pietro! That place is gorgeous! Very old and antique looking, and yet some of the most comfortable beds in the city." He suddenly stopped and shrugged. "And you are probably wondering how someone who LIVES in this city knows that, but we'll leave that to your imagination.

Summer laughed lightly at his humor and then took the piece of paper back from him. "Is it far?"

"No not at all, it's just a short walk from St. Peter's Square, the Starhotels Michelangelo is an ideal place to spend your unforgettable Roman holiday!" He sounded just like a tour guide or salesman.

"Well to be honest, I just liked the sound of the minibar, color satellite TV with international channels and the internet." She added on to his enthusiasm. "There isn't much else to do when you are by yourself. Summer decided to leave the part out that she this wasn't really a vacation, but rather on a mission.

The boy gave her a look as if she were just admitted to a psych ward. He shook his head and laughed lightly. "Mini bars and satellite TV, you are definitely my kind of girl! I can't go a day without watching the Valley. But please don't tell me you are going to stay in your hotel room your entire trip? This is Rome, one of the best cities in the world after all."

"Me? Stay inside all week in one of the best fashion capitals of the world? Please! What kind of girl do you think I am? Don't you see the way I am dressed?" With that she did a little twirl and smiled.

"I think we really WILL get a long quite well. You should come visit me tonight at my restaurant. It's one of the top rated in Rome, and if you ask for me I'll get you the best seat in the house." He smiled and gave her a little wink. "Then afterwards, if you play your cards right, I'll even take you out dancing. If you are as fabulous as I think you are, you will definitely be able to keep up with me on the dance floor."

It was as if she was put up to a challenge, one that she wouldn't be able to refuse. She had to prove her fabulousness. Adjusting the strap that lay on her shoulder she smiled and pondered his invitation. Part of her thought that going out might not be a good idea; she was running out of time, and really needed to find what she came here for. Yet there was something about this guy that just screamed fun. And she deserved ONE night off right?

"Well I wouldn't even know WHO to ask for. Or should I just say 'the most charming waiter you've got,' in hopes they will know who I am talking about?" She teased him, letting him know he had yet to introduce himself.

He couldn't help but laugh and after trying to hail a couple of cabs for her, but with no luck, he turned around and extended his hand to her. "My name is Marcello, but what you just said would work too."

The two of them continued to make small talk and laugh for the next few minutes. It was uncanny how comfortable they felt with each other. Summer couldn't believe the chemistry that they had. It was as if they had been the best of friends for years and they were now just catching up.

Finally a taxi was flagged, only after Summer got out and did the job herself, and it was time for them to go their separate ways.

"So after you get settled in and rest your cute little behind a bit, I'll see you at the restaurant?" Marcello asked her, making sure he had their plans down in his head.

"If you're lucky." She smiled, letting him know she was obviously kidding and the two of them put their bags in the back of the small white car.

"Mitico!" He out of instinct leaned over and kissed her lightly on the cheek before backing away. "And now I must bid you goodbye. I may be pretty but Joe has been dull to my charms for awhile now."

Summer chuckled and waved him goodbye. "What just happened?" She whispered to herself. She didn't know it was possible to make friends that fast.

As she started to get into the car, with a bright smile upon her face, she hesitated and her last phone conversation with Seth came flooding back to her. He kept on asking her if she had met anyone yet. Every time they phoned he asked his paranoid list of inquiries and Summer would simply state that she was far too busy to meet anyone or get into trouble. That would work for the time being, but she knew that as soon as Seth found out she had met someone, an extremely looking Italian man at that, his insecurities would inflate!

Although she was pretty sure that Marcello would never be interested in her. For her own sense of peace, she needed to be sure of what she suspected.

"Hey Marcello!"

He turned around as he was a few feet away and raised a brow. "Miss me already?"

Summer just shook her head, he was too much. "Just for the sake of letting my boyfriend's insecurities rest, you are uh…ummm… well you know?"

Marcello had to laugh. It had been a long time since anyone had even questioned him on this. He was pretty shocked that his flame didn't burn bright with someone as trendy, intuitive and intelligent as this young woman seemed to be.

Normally he would tease her, let her squirm a bit… who was he kidding, this was a rare occurrence, he had to take advantage of it. "I know what?" He stood there, a few feet away waiting for an explanation.

Summer's tanned face suddenly turned pale. Did she peg him wrong? Maybe he just seemed that way. Then again, it was hard to tell with some Europeans. She shifted from one foot to another, trying to think of something to say without sounding like a blonde girl from the valley.

Marcello's lips turned into a devious grin, and he wondered how long he should make her exist there uncomfortably. He folded his arms over his chest and tapped his brown Prada driving shoes on the stone beneath him. "You were saying? Come on, I'm running late."

Summer looked up and met his gaze once more. She was in an awful predicament now wasn't she? She didn't want to offend her newest and only friend in Italy, but she had to know so that she could set Seth at ease, and if he wasn't, she would have to lay things straight then and there.

Finally she mustered up the courage, and decided that being blunt would be the best way to go. It always worked for her in the past. "You're gay right?"

Marcello's eyes widened and he placed his hand over his chest, as if to say, 'who me?' But as he remained quiet he saw Summer grow more and more tense by the nanosecond, he decided to set her straight.

"Oh, is that all? Don't worry honey I'm a Kinsey Six." And with that he waved his hand and darted around the corner leaving Summer there confused.

"Kinsey six?" She spoke out loud, now with an even more perplexed look upon her face. Then, she too disappeared into the cab and down the street.

A few hours later, after Summer had settled into her new temporary dwelling, taken a much needed siesta, a very refreshing bath and successfully looked up what Kinsey six meant:

"_A person who is completely homosexual, as opposed to one with some bisexual inclinations. Sex researcher Alfred Kinsey developed a scale from 0 to 6 to indicate a subject's sexual orientation. A person with no homosexual feelings was ranked a zero. Someone exclusively homosexual was a 6._"

She was ready to go grab some food. She studied herself in the mirror one more time, admiring how much better she looked than a few hours previous. Not to mention how much better she felt. She was rejuvenated and now it was time to start all over again.

But not before she at first had a little bit of fun. Tucking her long dark hair behind her ears, she leaned over to fix her cherry lip gloss. She ran her finger along the outside of her lip line and then smiled. "Much improved."

She wasn't sure what Marcello had in mind, but they had decided that after eating dinner at the restaurant where he worked, he would take her out in Rome. She felt slightly guilty about being in Rome for a few hours now, and not doing any Cooper research. But she also knew that it had been three weeks since she had been to any party, talked with anyone remotely interesting enough to hold her attention, or even taken some time out to vibrate at a high frequency. She needed this. And she would be the first admit that she was craving real interaction. It would be how she explained her connection with Marcello after only minutes of meeting him. She needed this… she needed a friend.

She grabbed her bag, making sure that all her possessions were neatly inside and went out the door. About twenty minutes later she arrived in front of her destination. Stepping out, she wore a calf length flowing white skirt and a simple olive green tank topped with a brown 'metal jacket' that was cotton with a metallic thread and a stand collar with a snap. She looked around her new setting, taking it all in. Although the buildings were obviously very ancient, they had been decorated with trendy lights and flowers. She turned around to see a brightly lit sign that read, "Joseppi's". She thanked the cab driver, paid him and took off towards the restaurant.

Within moments she understood why someone as chic as Marcello would want to work in a restaurant. The place was gorgeous, stylish and definitely in use. It was so crowded, that it took her far too long to even reach a hostess. Moving up, she suddenly realized that this wasn't the place where one would eat alone and she suddenly felt as if her once nice outfit was underdressed. She unexpectedly grew a bit nervous and timidly spoke to the hostess.

"Table for one please…" She paused and looked around herself cautiously. "I'm supposed to ask for Marcello Fanntinelli."

The hostess looked at her, slowly letting her gaze work up and down. When she finally reached her eyes again she let out a piercing laugh. Before she even spoke she gave Summer the most obnoxious look, topped with a snooty nose raise. And once she finally did speak, it was as if Summer was bothering her. Her accent was so thick, she was difficult to understand. "A table with Marcello will be at least an hour."

Summer was NEVER one to be shy, or even intimated. In spite of being in a foreign land, or even unsure of where she was, she was a still a Newpsie and was raised to be amongst the most fashionable, richest and elite. Why should this be any different? And yet for a moment Summer was a bit taken back. She blinked a few times. Did she just hear her correctly? An hour? She just shook her head, that just wouldn't do.

"I am sorry, I don't think that you heard me correctly." She stood up tall, and placed both of her hands on either end of the hostess podium, leaning forward slightly. "My name is Summer Roberts, and I DO have reservations. I am most positive that if you check with Mr. Fanntinelli, he will assure you that I am very important and should be seated right away." Her voice was certain and strong, and she gave her a look that screamed 'don't mess with me.'

The hostess was unsure of what to say or do, she wasn't expecting a retaliation. For a moment she opened her mouth to speak, but Summer raised her brow as if to say, 'I dare you to second guess me.' And then she held up her index finger and walked away.

Summer stood there and turned around to face a young couple who had just entered the restaurant. She smiled sweetly and stepped to the side to let them pass. A few moments later the hostess returned, ignoring the people who were standing in front of her and peeked her head around them. "Signora Roberts, right this way."

Moments later Summer was sitting not only at a table, but it seemed to be one of the better tables in the place; on the second floor, right by the window over looking a gorgeous Roman street. She smiled to the hostess, and took her seat. The hostess grumbled under her breath, gave her the menu and then disappeared. Summer sat with a satisfied smile upon her face.

Before she could even look at the menu, Marcello dressed all in black popped his head over the laminated paper and smiled. "Ciao la mia ragazza bella." He took the menu from her and stood up tall, with an excited smile plastered upon his face.

"I wish you would stop calling me things in Italian. I don't know if you are calling me gorgeous or the creature from the black lagoon."

Marcello rolled his eyes and shook his head. "I would never do such a thing, and maybe if you learned a bit of an Italian it wouldn't be a problem." He reached into a cold bucket and pulled out a bottled water, setting it on the table. "You Americani, so self centered, you don't think you need to learn anything beyond English."

Summer opened her mouth for a rebuttle and then closed it once again, knowing it was pretty close to the truth.

"See, told you."

She leaned over and swatted his arm playfully. He mocked a fake pout and the two of them laughed. It didn't take them long to fall back into playful banter. Summer scolded him for causing her to spend a half an hour in front of the computer trying to figure out what Kinsley Six was, and he complained that if she was savvy enough she would have already known Summer couldn't believe how easy it was to get comfortable with him; they just clicked.

After a few minutes Marcello said he had to get back to work and went to order her his favorite dish. Throughout the next hour and a half Summer experienced the most amazing food and great music. Every chance he got, which wasn't as often as either would have liked, he came to chat it up with her. But before they knew it, his shift was almost over, and Summer couldn't wait to spend the night on the town with him.

He of course wouldn't let her pay, and they had to argue about that for a good five minutes. But in the end Marcello won, but only because Summer promised to buy him a drink later in the evening. It was almost midnight and Summer was well rested and now stuffed with pasta. She was ready to burn some of the carbs.

After changing back into his street clothes, Marcello came back out of the kitchen and linked his arm with Summer's. "Let's go my love. We have places to see and people to do."

Summer joined her new friend and started walking towards the front of the restaurant. As they descended the stairs to go towards the front door, Summer looked ahead of her and unexpectedly stopped right in the middle of the stairs, causing the people behind her to knock into them.

"I'm sorry... umm you can go around me." She looked around in a bit of a panic and she could feel her heart beat fast. The people looked annoyed but continued to move around her without hesitation. She paused and tried to take a few steps back up the stairs backwards and out of view of the hostess stand. She tripped and almost fell on her butt again, but caught herself and stood back up. The look on her face resembled a little girl who just walked in on her parents doing the deed. She wanted to get out of sight fast.

"Way to be stealth Summer." She spoke to herself and finally made her way enough up the stairs to be out of view of anyone downstairs. "If Seth could only see you now, he would be lecturing you on how he should have been her to help... gawd!"

Marcello watched the spectical fold out in front of him, and had to hold his hand over his mouth to keep in the laughter. "Summer, what is it that you are doing? The sites are that way!" He pointed back towards the door, but when Summer didn't look back he followed her back up the stairs. Now Summer was bending her head down so far that she was practically standing on her head so that she could see the patrons below her. She was practically hanging upside down.

"It.. it's her. I can't believe it's her!" Summer shook her head. She had been searching so hard for three weeks, and she just stumbles upon her like it wasn't difficult at all. She continued to look back at her, to make sure that she wasn't just seeing things.

Marcello tried to figure out who in the world his newest friend was talking about. He looked back down towards the crowd running his eyes through it. Then his gaze stopped on a firey red head. Among all the Italians, she definitely stood out. Her brightly colored outfit screamed loudly among the sea of black. He rolled his eyes, surely Summer couldn't be talking about her.

He looked back to her, and back to the crowd, trying to follow her gaze. "You know Julie Cooper?" He looked back to Summer, and just when she thought she couldn't be shocked more, her head snapped around towards him and she gasped.

"You do!"

Marcello just laughed and shrugged. "Well if you qualify her barking out orders at me some kind of association, then yes I know her quite well."

Summer couldn't believe her ears. It was fate. She had made friends with someone who knew Julie! Suddenly her faith and determination was restored to its fullest and the wheels started to turn in her head. She continued to watch her best friend's mother, seeing her as she yelled at the hostess. Summer stood there smugly, _well at least she was doing something right. _

As soon as Julie starting heading towards the stairs Summer panicked and grabbed Marcello by the hand. "Quick you have to hide me!"

Marcello laughed as she dragged him back up the rest of the stairs and found the nearest door. Without even asking if it was ok to go in, she opened it up, and dragged the two of them in. The door slammed shut and it went pitch black.

"Summer I already told you I came out of the closet when I was 21, what are you doing dragging me back in!"

Before he could say another word a loud wack could be heard and Marcello screamed. "Ow!"

"Would you shut up, I don't want her to see me yet!" Summer didn't know what to do. She didn't know the lay out of the restaurant, but there had to be another way out. Although she had it all planned out just exactly WHAT she wanted to say to Julie once she confronted her, she wasn't expecting her this soon. She wasn't prepared mentally, she needed time to recoop.

"Well you didn't have to hit me! If Joe finds me in the closet with some girl, an American one no less he is going to think I've gone mad... then again, he is banging one himself, maybe it will get me another raise." Marcello continued to ramble on in complete darkness, and if he could see Summer's big brown eyes he would see them roll.

As they stood there, a weird silence fell over them. As he rubbed his shoulder where Summer surely left a bruise, Marcello was trying to figure out why they were hiding out in a closet. In the mean time Summer was coming up with a plan. Thirty more seconds passed and Summer flipped open her cell phone. A bright blue light suddenly flooded the closet and Summer could see that there faces were merely inches apart.

"Ok Marcey, here is the plan..." She looked him straight in the eye, the eery glow casting upon Summer's assertive face made her look like an ice queen. "First, you are going to get us out of here, with OUT Julie seeing me."

Marcello opened his mouth to speak, first to complain about the new nick name she created for him out of no where, and then to ask why she couldn't be seen by Julie. However, he was cut off before he could even utter a sound.

"Shut up, I'll explain everything later. Then we are going to go back to my hotel room. I need to know everything that you know about her. Where she lives, what she does, everything." Summer stopped for a moment, fleetingly realizing just how rude she just was. But before she could apologize Marcello spoke up.

"I like a woman who knows what she wants." He smirked and the cell phone light faded out. He didn't know what was going on, but he was always up for an adventure.

"Come on let's go."


	5. The Build Up

_Chapter Five: The Build Up_

As the short, curvy brunette sat in the passenger side of the old jeep wrangler she had her face pinned tightly to a large green book, trying desperately to read its words in the very dim light. As the sentences became more and more of a blur, she finally gave up and sighed softly. Her long loose curly hair was lying loosely around her shoulders, giving her a very soft and sexy look. Trying to stay comfortable for their long ride, she was wearing an old pair of jeans and one of her boyfriend's wife beaters. After marking her place with a feather, she closed the sixth Harry Potter story. Next, she kicked off her white flip flops and brought her knees up to her chest. With out saying a word she leaned over to turn up the radio and then turned to stare out the window as the sun was replaced with its counterpart, the moon and bright shining stars.

Although he was driving, and she obviously didn't think that he was paying attention to her by the way she was stirring, Ryan had still been watching her every move. It was something he loved doing, watching her when she had no idea that he was. When she didn't know, he caught her doing some of the most adorable things.

And then he broke the peace. "What's the matter, did Harry mess up some magic spell against Merlin or something?" He looked at her out of the corner of his eye and smirked slightly.

Isabella smiled lightly and turned her hazel green gaze towards the man she loved, even if he teased her almost continuously. "First of all it's Voldemort." She corrected him with a bit of a defensive tone, but at the same time smiled inwardly at him for at least trying. "Secondly no, it's just getting to difficult to read. Are we almost there?"

Ryan chuckled lightly at her impatience. He looked at her and then to the clock on the dash board. "Almost." They had already been driving for about five hours, and just about reaching the northern city limits of Los Angelus.

She perked up and stretched her arms up to the ceiling, yawning slightly. As she did, her shirt came up, revealing her stomach every so slightly. The couple was exhausted, which kept their talking on this trip to a minimum. They had just gotten off work, and seeing how this was the first time both of them had two days off in a row together, they had spontaneously decided to surprise the Cohen's with a visit.

It had been nearly a month since Ryan had seen them last and much much longer since he had been back to Newport. It was about due time for him to finally face the enormous mansions, sandy beaches and plastic woman. Besides, Seth had been calling Ryan every night telling him that he had to come home because he was bored. He was tired of something, antsy, and needed some real Seth and Ryan time.

So here they were, and in the home stretch Ryan was having second thoughts. Then again, he did this just about EVERY time he made his way home. It was with mixed emotions that he left the new comfort of San Francisco where the memories were of all new experiences, and trucked back to Newport. And yet he knew that he had to. He couldn't stay away for ever. It wasn't fair to the ones that had done so much for him, and it wasn't fair to him. He had to face the demons that haunted him; he just wished that it would get easier.

"Good, because my legs are falling asleep, I am dying of thirst and I really can't wait to crash in a big comfy bed." She paused a bit and realized how whiney she was sounding. She made a face and scratched her stomach lightly.

Ryan just looked at her with wide eyes and laughed. She was cute when she was irritable.

"Sorry, I know you're tired too. And I'm happy we are going to your home town, it's been awhile. I'm just irritable." She stated the obvious and then leaned over the space between the two car seats and rested her hand on his thigh.

"It's ok; I know that it's been long day. I can't wait to go to bed either." He shook his head some more and couldn't help but laugh.

"What? Oh no, I don't even want to know what you are thinking." Isabella couldn't help but laugh at him.

"What!" He looked at her innocently and shook his head. But as their eyes met once again a smirk fell across his face, and she swatted him playfully. Then he laughed, becoming more serious.

"No, that isn't it at all. I mean it could be partly it, but… I just know that once we get there, there is no chance in hell Seth is going to let us sleep." He turned the corner heading on the other side of LA and moving their way to Newport.

"He has called ten times since we left Berkley, and he can't stop rambling about how excited he is about Seth and Ryan time."

"Good, great." She started and let her feet drop back to the floor. "YOU can have time with your brother, and _I_ can sleep!"

"Oh no no," Ryan started. "If I have to stay up listening to Seth ramble on and on about all the drama he created this last semester, so do you."

Isabella's mouth dropped open and she tried to protest. "But Seth wants Ryan/Seth time, not Seth/Ryan/Isabella time. I don't want to intrude on your sacred rituals."

Ryan lifted his eye brow and turned to stare at her. She continued to talk about why it wouldn't be good for her to impose on male bonding, and how it could throw off the karma of the universe and Ryan just sat there quiet.

Once she was done, she sat there satisfied with her defense and leaned her head back against the cool window. Ryan smiled and reached his hand over to touch her shoulder. "Seth loves you!" He began, now giving his side of the argument. "He was telling me just last night that he needs to take advantage of you and your counseling sessions now, before you get your PHD and charge him mega bucks."

Isabella laughed. Neither Ryan nor she had the heart to tell him that she wasn't going to become a Psychologist, but rather a social worker. She sighed, knowing she wasn't going to win this battle.

"Besides, even if he didn't like you, you are part of the family now. Which means that you have inherited some of the Seth time. And you are NOT getting out of this one."

Isabella turned to him, her tired eyes now showing a glow inside. He had said that she was part of the family. No matter how tired she was, she couldn't refuse now. "Ok Ry, I'll sit with you and Seth. But I draw the line on that stupid ninja game."

Ryan laughed and nodded in agreement. "Of course not." The two of them stopped talking, Isabella looking out at the stars, and Ryan merging onto another highway reading a sign that said:_ Newport__ 10 Miles. _"You are more the Star Wars type anyway."

Isabella's mouth dropped open and she snapped her head back to him. But when she saw the smirk on his lips, and the loving look in his blue eyes, she just laughed and shook it off. It was going to be a long night.

It was the next day on the other side of the world, and the sun had risen a few hours ago. Rays of light were streaming through the east window of Marissa's small yet gorgeous room in Formello. As the golden luminosity hit her in the face, she squinted her already closed eyes and groaned loudly. She cursed herself for forgetting to shut the curtains, and turned her body around to face the other way in her antique canopy bed. The sheets and comforter engulfed the body masses that lay in the queen sized cradle as she tried to hide from the intruding star's warmth. As soon as she turned she felt two strong hands wrap around her dainty frame. This made Marissa's scowl turn into a slight grin, and her eyes fluttered open to reveal their soft blue.

"Good morning love." Bray smiled into her eyes and reached his hand up to push some darkish blonde locks away from her well defined face.

Marissa smiled and curled her body up closer to his. They were both clothed in their pajamas, Bray in long cotton blue pants without a shirt, and Marissa clad in short, silk, pink shorts and a matching tank top. And although their bodies were somewhat covered, Marissa could still feel the warmth radiating from him and it comforted her.

"Mmmm good morning." She smiled, letting her hand run lightly across his bare chest. With her touch, Bray took a deep breath; she had no idea just how much he wanted her.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked her, with true concern in his voice. He knew that she had nightmares often. In fact, Bray new as much about Marissa as she did. Although they had only been dating for about a year, he knew of Marissa's amnesia and of the accident, at least her version of it. In fact, from his conversations with Julie, he might even know a bit more.

As he rubbed her hips lightly through the thin material of her tank top she let out a small smile. "Actually, very well!" She acted very surprised. He smiled and they moved even closer together.

Although Marissa and Bray were close emotionally, they weren't as far as most couples were their age physically. Lucky for her, Bray was extremely patient. And they had just started 'sleeping' together. "I seem not to have those dreams when you are here with me." She spoke quietly, resting her head on his chest.

Bray smiled. He was happy that he could provide security for her. He just couldn't help but want something more. He wished that she felt safe enough with him to share everything.

"Well maybe we'll have to make this more of a habit then, now shouldn't we?" And with that he lightly pressed Marissa back so that she was forced onto her back and he was hovering over her. His dark chocolate eyes burning into her own. "I mean, my girl needs her beauty sleep."

Marissa couldn't help but take a deep breath. He was always gentle with her, and never pressured her. But the more and more they spent the night together, she knew the harder it was becoming for him to resist her. And just then she could feel just how 'hard' it was.

"Easy there killer." She laughed and pressed her hands to his chest softly, holding him back. He just chuckled and she continued. "I'd like that though… I mean, as long as you are enjoying it too."

Bray shook his head and laughed at her. "Are you kidding? There is nothing more that I want than to be laying here next to you."

"Nothing more?" She asked with a raise of a brow. She held back her smirk as she ran her knee lightly up between his legs.

He shuddered slightly and let out an excited laugh. "Are you trying to kill this poor chap?" He laughed, but didn't seem to mind at all as her teasing ways. The two of them giggled and he lowered his body closer to hers. As their lips inched closer to one another, they could feel each others breath upon their faces.

"I love you Marissa Cooper." He whispered, his lips now so close to hers that when he moved them, they lightly danced along the outside of hers.

Marissa just grinned and arched her back, to press her body into his. At the same time he leaned down and pulled one of the straps of her tank top aside to press his lips to her collar bone. "Are you just trying to get lucky Mr. Edeson?"

After a few more kisses Bray pulled back and smiled. "Miss Cooper, I am already lucky."

Marissa's heart melted and she closed her eyes. It was probably the sweetest thing anyone had ever said to her (from what she could remember anyway.) She exhaled slowly and didn't protest when his hands began to freely roam over her essence. And into the late morning sun, the young couple forgot the rest of the world. So much that Marissa _almost_ forgot about that chapter of her life that had been erased…. almost.

"Cohen, would you shut up and listen to me for a moment!" Summer was growing inpatient. She had spent the entire evening with Marcello. They had skipped site seeing upon Summer's request, and went back to her hotel room to dive directly into the plan. So she had been up all night, and had just called Seth to update him on her new found information.

However, upon hearing Summer's voice, Seth grew so excited, that he forgot that he even had ears. And for the last 5 minutes straight Seth had been filling Summer in on his latest adventures of ninjas, super heroes and pirates. And when he was finished with that he started to move into complaining about how bored he was alone with just Sandy and Kirsten to entertain him.

"Summer?" He gasped and held a hand to his chest. "Did you just tell me to shut up?"

"Can it Cohen! It's not like it was the first time. Besides, this is important!" Summer rolled her eyes and looked to Marcello laying on her bed holding his stomach in laughter.

"Are you insinuating that my life of video games and comic books isn't important?" He was offended, here he thought that his girlfriend supported his passions.

"SETH!" Summer didn't have time to play games, she was tired and needed to get a couple hours of sleep before phase one of their plan took place. "We found her!"

And then the impossible happened, Seth actually shut up. In fact there was now dead silence on his end of the phone. He sat there for what seemed like a decade and at first Summer thought that she had lost her overseas connection. "Cohen?"

"Holy foshizzle batman, what!" His eyes lit up and he jumped out of his bed with exhilaration. He couldn't believe it, but Summer had actually done it, she had found the missing person of the fantastic four. A million thoughts started running through his brain. Was she still the same? Was she happy to see Summer? Did she still carry around all that drama that he loved to use for his comic? Ryan was coming home and he couldn't wait to tell him… he couldn't wait to share the newest gossip. Wait did she just say, 'we?'

"Did you just say we?"

Summer jumped slightly at his sudden outburst and then rolled his eyes at his reaction. "Yes we, Marcello and I. He actually works at the restaurant that Julie's newest, gag me now, fling owns…. I haven't seen Marissa yet, but Marcy has been filling me in on what he knows and…"

But she was interrupted by a very paranoid Seth. "Marcy? Who is Marcy and why haven't I heard about him yet?" He tilted his head, full of worry an inquisition.

If Summer could reach, she would have leaned across the ocean and smacked him up side the head. "Cohen, are you hearing me? I… FOUND… MARISSA!"

"That's great and all, and I can't wait for you to rescue her from the evil wraith of the Fire Mistress, but I think what is important here Summer, is who Marcello is, and what your relationship is with him." He folded his arms across his chest, tapping his converse sneakers on the plush carpet, and waited for an explanation.

Summer groaned when she realized that is was completely helpless to go on with her story without reassuring him that there was nothing going on. "Cohen, when are you going to learn to trust me? I was away for an entire semester freshman year, without the likes of you and I didn't ONCE think about anyone else BUT you. If you don't know by now how much I love you, how much I can't live without you, then I think we have some serious issues."

Suddenly Seth's insecurities melted away. A smirk fell across his face and he relaxed, letting his lanky arms fall to his sides. "Can you say that part again?"

"What they we have some serious issues?"

"No the part about how much you loooove me!" He smiled and fell back onto his bed.

"You are such an ass, Cohen!" She sounded annoyed, but only Marcello could see the change in her eyes. He couldn't help but laugh at their obviously bizarre ways of affection. He just shook his head and let her finish.

"So tell me what you know." Seth instructed Summer to finally continue. And then she proceeded to fill him in on the town of Formello, the restaurant in Italy, and the fact that Julie did indeed seem to have sheltered Marissa from the truth. Seth listened attentively as Summer spoke, chiming in here and there only when he knew Summer wouldn't bite his head off, and within the matter of 15 minutes he was all caught up.

"Wow, so what's the next step?" He asked, growing more excited by the minute, and wishing he could be there to help her out? "Do you need my presence to develop an expert undercover mission?" He asked with hope in his voice, his ideas starting to run out of his mouth.

"Cohen, no!" She spoke with sternness. "Marcello and I are developing a really good plan, and if you come and Julie sees you, it could all be ruined."

Seth felt like his heart had just been ripped out of his chest and he sighed loudly.

"But I promise if I need any extra help, you will be the first one I call." She reassured him.

And although it didn't help much, Seth shook his head. "Ok Summer my own Magnum P.I. " He sighed again. "But keep me updated." Just then Seth heard the door downstairs open and Ryan's voice yell. "We're home!" followed by a "That's odd, I would have expected him to wait up for us."

"Eww Cohen, Tom Selleck is so not attractive." She made an 'eww' face right at the same time that Marcello did and they both laughed.

"Summer, I've gotta go, Ryan just came home and I can't wait to…"

"Remember your promise Cohen!" Her tone immediately changed and she warned him before he could even finish his sentence.

Seth stopped dead in his tracks and remembered he had promised Summer that he would not tell Ryan of what she was doing. It was going to be difficult, but he had to try.

"Right, I won't tell Ryan that…"

"Don't tell Ryan what?" Ryan came bursting through the doors with a huge grin on his face.

"Gotta go Summer, have fun in ah… skiing in the Alps." He turned around so that Ryan couldn't see his face and he rolled his eyes at himself for coming up with a horrific cover up.

Summer heard Ryan's voice in the background and shook her head. "Good one Cohen. Just remember that if you slip and tell him, I might just have to slip and kiss my new friend Marcello."

Seth gasped and shook his head vigorously. "You play dirty Summer… very very dirty."

"I learn from the best." She smiled proudly. "Now get off the phone, and think of something clever to tell him, I will call you tomorrow night… oh and Cohen?"

"Yeah."

"I love you, and miss you."

"I love you too Summer, hurry back." With that Seth flipped his cell phone shut and smiled. And then Ryan cleared his throat and he remembered he had to come up with a story fast.


	6. The Forward Plan

_Chapter Six: The Forward Plan_

"Was that Summer?" Ryan asked as he moved inside Seth's punk rock themed room and took a seat on the edge of his bed full sized bed clad in blue and pale yellow stripes. He looked around, and it was exactly how he remembered it being back in high school. But then again, the entire house looked untouched, excluding some new art Kirsten had picked up.

Once they got home, Isabella and Ryan had quickly made their way through the first level of the house, only to find it completely empty. This worried Ryan, and so Izzy offered to take their bags into the pool house, while Ryan checked upstairs.

Seth looked down to him. He knew there was no use lying about who it was on the phone, who else did he talk to anyway? His hands began to grow sweaty, and so he leaned down to rub them off on his light brown corduroys. Why was he so nervous? It was almost as if he should be ashamed of talking to his own girlfriend.

"Of course it was Summer. Who else would I say 'I love you' to?" He asked and rolled his eyes as if it was the most stupid inquiry ever known to man. Really he was just trying to avoid the question he knew Ryan was going to ask again. But his face was a dead give away, and Ryan was no fool. "I mean, I know that most woman find me to be the cats meow, la crème de la crème, but really Ryan, I'm a one woman kind of guy. Well not counting that fateful Thanksgiving day when…"

"I remember Seth." He interrupted him before he could even get started. "Really could your head get any bigger? That was definitely a fluke." He spoke and laughed lightly. Just like his room, some things never changed. "So how is she doing?" He decided to play the game a bit longer; ignoring the fact that Seth had just said he wouldn't tell him something.

Seth smiled, completely relieved that he wasn't going to ask him again. But he was really afraid that if he started talking about her, he would let something slip. And the thought of Summer slipping something else to some other random guy made his stomach churn. And so he had to change the topic all together and he had to do it fast.

"So buddy, how was your trip? Six hours in a car, man I don't know how you do it? My bum would have fallen asleep after the first twenty minutes. My legs would cramp, then again my legs are a lot longer than yours but still. You should have just asked Mom and Dad to buy you some tickets. It's not like they don't have the money, or did you forget that our family is kind of loaded?" Seth continued on, explaining to him, once again, how to take advantage of Mr. and Mrs. Sanford Cohen.

The fact that Seth completely changed the subject obviously didn't go unnoticed by his blonde brother. And with his gorgeous blues, Ryan gave him an all too familiar glare. And yet Seth either didn't see it, or could it be possible that he had become too accustomed to it to let it faze him?

"And even your little snow bunny could have gotten one. I know how you guys are all penny pinchers and stuff. But you don't have to pinch money when it's not yours to begin with." Seth continued on more and more, almost talking as if no one was there to listen to him.

"Seth!" Ryan spoke in a very stern voice, and their eyes finally met when Ryan gave him another glare. This time Seth shivered slightly and shut up for a moment. "So what is it that you can't tell me?" Ryan asked with a half smirk. He had decided to be straight forward. Knowing that if he didn't then he would have to listen to Seth ramble all night.

"Wha.. what are you talking about? By the way, where is your Buffalonian? I was sure I heard her in the car when I called you on your brave adventure down here. Did she decide not to co…"

"You mean all TEN times you called?" Ryan shook his head and ran a hand through his hair, which had gotten quite a bit longer than the last time Seth had seen him; he was growing impatient. "Stop changing the subject anyway, what's going on?"

Seth stood there, his second attempt at changing the topic failing miserably. His brain started to work on overdrive, trying to think of some sort of explanation. He scratched the back of his neck and met Ryan's eyes again, knowing by his look that he wasn't just going to let him slide by_. "Why does she trust me with anything?"_ Seth mumbled softly to himself.

And then, miraculously and out of no where he blurted out, "Summer was just telling me about the gift she got you in Europe, its uh… it's really cool." Seth's eyes widened at his stroke of genius and he smiled, satisfied with his answer. "It's no glorified wife beater or anything my friend, but I am sure you will love it nonetheless."

"My gift? You mean like a souvenir? Summer didn't have to do that." Ryan looked at him confused. He couldn't figure out what the big deal was about a gift, but knowing the two of them, they made everything a big deal.

"Au contraire mon frére. You know how much Summer likes to shop. She is so excited to come back and give us all our presents. She gets some sort of high off of it. But really, who am I to complain? I definitely could use some new clothes, maybe from the new Armani line. I wonder if you get a discount in Italy."

Seth continued to ramble, and Ryan couldn't help but chuckle. "Italy, I thought she was in France?"

Seth looked at him wide eyed and thought of something quick. "Oh, she is all over the place. You know our Summer, busy like the cute little bee that she is. In fact, I believe your gift just might be English." He thought to himself for a moment, yes the last name 'Cooper' was definitely English.

Ryan raised a brow and nodded with approval. He always had a hard time accepting gifts, but over the last six years with the coaching of the Cohen's, it was getting easier. He finally understood that allowing someone to give you a gift was humbling. And allowing someone to do something for you was a huge step for him.

Then there was a short silence that filled the room as both young men looked around and pondered over different things. They were both trying to figure out if what they had just discussed was satisfying or not. Just when Seth was about to speak up to assure that he was in fact telling the truth, he heard a beep come from his cell phone, indicating that he had a text. He reached into his pocket, pulled it out and flipped it open to read: '_You better not have slipped yet!_' And then a picture of Summer with Marcello appeared with Summer's arms wrapped tightly around his small body.

Seth studied it intensely for a moment, trying to decide if Marcello was sexier than he was or not. After a few moments and a throat clearing from Ryan, Seth shut his phone and rolled his eyes. "She has no faith in me."

"Do you blame her?" Ryan smirked and stood up off his bed, indicating that he was ready to leave the room.

"No, but we'll keep that secret to ourselves. Come on, let's go down stairs. I have had the PS2 set up for hours. Do you know how long it's been screaming at me to play it? But I firmly told it no, knowing that you would want the first crack at it seeing how its been so long, and you will need to warm up to face the master. See how selfless I have become?"

And as the two brothers walked out of the room, just like old times, Ryan couldn't help but laugh, imagining Seth truly talking to the man made machine. They made their way down stairs where Isabella was waiting for them patiently. And into the early morning sunrise, the three of them bonded over Seth's favorite past times: Play Station, pudding, and talking about himself.

After only a few hours of sleep, Summer had been rejuvenated and ready to go. Marcello had already finished getting ready, and was sitting on the edge of the bed watching as Summer finished putting on her make up. Marcello was clad in his newest outfit by John Varvatos; white form fitting slacks, a simple baby blue tee that clung to his body, topped with black loafers and a dark green zipper jacket that not only had random zippers on the front that went different ways, but also zipped both up and down, so that he could bring them together in the middle, leaving the top and the bottom open to show off the blue beneath. Summer wanted to look as Italian as possible, to be sure that she blended in. Her hair was stick straight, making it look blacker than ever. Her short legs looked longer in her dark grey Herringbone Pants. They were a thin and straight legged that looked fresh and new in a diamond-pattern with cuffed hem. On top she wore a Sadie Printed Silk Blouse, with a pintucked front and ruffled details to define a sheer silk organza style. Over top of the silk blouse was an embroidered bustier top that was satin and strapless with a crinkled chiffon sash with metallic details. The outfit was completed with a pair of Jimmy Choo's patent ankle strap pumps. She looked hot if she did say so herself. And Marcello noticed too.

"Damn girl, I thought we were going to spy on your beloved Marissa, not go hit on hot Italian men?" He leaned back onto his hands and watched as she put the finishing touches of her lip gloss on.

Summer turned to him and smiled. "We are going to do research, NOT spy. Besides, I bought this outfit in Paris, and have been dying to wear it. Do you think I will blend in?" She stepped away from the mirror and did a slight turn for him and then posed waiting for a response.

"Honey, with your looks I don't think you could blend in anywhere!" He meant it as a compliment, and Summer just ate it up. She moved over to the bed and took him by the hands to pull him into a standing position.

"Come on, let's go." She turned around to straighten her outfit and to check herself out one more time; Marcello doing the same thing behind her. "And you are sure that Julie and Marissa always go to the restaurant for brunch?"

Marcello responded as they headed out of the hotel and down to the Vespas that he got for them for the day. "Almost every day! I haven't had the morning shift in a couple of weeks, but by now Joseppi should be giving them Julie's favorite table. Once they sit and chat for a bit, they almost always order the same exact thing. Julie gets espresso with an English muffin and fruit, while Marissa gets her usual tall stack of pancakes."

Summer paused to smile as she pictured Marissa eating her pile of pancakes. For a moment her mind wandered to their times at the Diner in Newport and she sighed to herself. "Though her life is always unforeseen her appetite is forever predictable." They both laughed and Summer raised her brow at the Vespa she was supposed to get on. "It's kind of small." She tilted her head and studied a bit.

"It's my sister's, so don't crash it, or she will have my head. And trust me, it's not as pretty without the body to accompany it." Marcello got on his own scooter and handed Summer a helmet. "Come on, Formello is about thirty minutes away."

Summer was a little weary at first, wondering if maybe she wore the wrong outfit. But just as she hesitated she saw two men in designer business suits fly down the street on their very own Vespas. She smiled and shrugged. "Onward Formello!"

"Marissa honey, what is the matter, are you not feeling well?" Julie Cooper-Nichol, almost but not quite Roberts was sitting across from her eldest daughter with an all too familiar look plastered on her botoxed face: a forged smile. Julie had just finished reassuring her love for her latest beau, Joseppi and she blew him a kiss as he walked away. And now it was time to give her daughter some attention. They had just ordered their food, for her it was the regular, but Marissa had only ordered fruit. And now for the first time Julie seemed to notice that Marissa was distant.

"I'm fine mother, I just didn't get that much sleep last night." She spoke as she leaned back in her chair, and looked out the window into the familiar Roman streets. There was more to it than that, but Marissa was in no mood to get into it with her mother.

Julie couldn't help but frown severely as she unfolded her napkin, and laid it across her lap. "Oh honey, are you still having those horrid dreams? I should talk to your doctor, maybe he can prescribe a new medication to get rid of them"

"No." Marissa stated brusquely. "No more medication, I am fine." The last thing that she wanted was to stop her brain from trying to remember; she couldn't help but think that the dreams just might start to bring her to the truth. "Besides it wasn't the dreams last night, Bray came over remember?"

And with that, Julie's frown quickly turned into a smile again. This time however, it wasn't fake, but rather quite genuine. She knew that what she had done to Marissa was very risky. But she also knew it was best for her. And the fact that Marissa had met such a nice young man, one with no drama, who supported her and loved her, made Julie realize she had made the right decision. Not to mention, he of course was loaded. On rare occasions it killed her to see Marissa struggle with trying to regain her memories. She hated to see her daughter in any form of pain. But in her opinion, the pain from the three years that she had caused was worse than the pain she was currently experiencing. The accident was their chance, to start over, to try again. And so far, Julie's plan had worked beautifully. Marissa attended university, was dating a brilliant young man, and Julie had also met someone knew… someone who could take care of them.

"Ooh la la Marissa, do tell! Bray is definitely one sexy guy, and oh my gawd that body, he must be excellent between the sheets." Julie grinned and leaned forward to look into Marissa's eyes. Her enthusiasm was almost sickening. She wanted to know the details, but not just for the gossip, to ensure that her daughter was happy.

"We just talked mom." Marissa said flatly. And even if her and Bray had done something more, she wasn't about to tell her mother, even if she was her closest friend.

"Just talked?" Julie asked with wide eyes. She couldn't imagine laying in bed with someone as handsome as Bray, and JUST talk. And now she was curious.

"Yes, just talked. It is possible for two people to sleep together and not let anything happen." She explained it to her as plainly as she could. But she knew her mother too well, and knew that it would be hard for her to understand.

"Oh Mariss, you don't have to tell me, I did it all the time with Ca… with your father." She quickly corrected herself. As far as Marissa was concerned her mother had never married Caleb Nichol, and Julie cursed herself for almost letting the cat out of the bag. "But honey, you are young and beautiful, what would keep you from taking full advantage of such a strapping young man?"

Marissa rolled her eyes once again. She hadn't caught on that Julie almost said another name besides 'Jimmy.' And the thought of discussing her non existent love life with her mom was causing her to grow ill. Should she tell her the truth? That she had a hard time trusting anyone. After all Luke had cheated on her. And according to Julie, so did Koby with her own best friend at the time. Not that she remembered Koby, but still it was the same in principle. Or should she explain to her that she was scared, scared that she didn't even know what she was giving him. She decided on the most simplistic explanation she could think of.

"I'm just not ready yet. It's kind of hard to give yourself to someone when you don't even know what you are giving." And with that Marissa was saved by the server who returned with their food.

Julie frowned once more and sat there staring at her gorgeous daughter as she began to pick at the fruit in front of her. She looked the same, but Julie knew that something was missing. Marissa's absent mind had changed her. And as Marissa spoke those harsh words, Julie felt as if someone had just threw a bolder into her stomach. It had hit home, and maybe for the first time Julie was actually having REAL second thoughts about her 'virtuoso plan.' Was it better to live a life free of pain and drama, even if it was naively fake? Or had Julie done the wrong thing yet again? Maybe all of that pain and drama had truly made Marissa the person she was today.

"Hello, earth to Julie?" Marissa spoke up when she saw her mother in deep thought. "What's the matter, did they butter your muffin with the real butter instead of fat free margarine?" Marissa laughed lightly at her joke.

And as she did, Julie laughed lightly as well and took a bite of her breakfast. Maybe… just maybe Neil was right. But she couldn't turn back now. She had spent three years building this faux life. She wasn't going to ruin it. "Sorry honey, I was just thinking of all our tasks that we have to do today. Maybe we can cheat on our diets and stop by and grab some gelato." She smiled, trying hard to make light of everything.

"Ummm sure Mom." Marissa shook her head, and the two women continued to eat their breakfast in near silence. Something that didn't occur very often with the Cooper woman.

"Are you sure this is the right place?" Summer stood holding her helmet under her arm and looking up at a quaint old villa sitting on a small hill surrounded by grape fields. Although it was only 20 minutes out side of Rome, it was like they were in a different world. Just like the city, everything seemed long-standing and ancient. But instead of just the elaborate stone structures, everything was also covered in vines. It was absolutely beautiful; a scene from what Summer would imagine the Garden of Eden to look like. And although it was stunning it still didn't really look like anything Julie Cooper would pick out. Which is why Summer had doubted the information he had given her. She looked to Marcello and then looked to the house and back to him again.

"Of course it is, Bella. I told you I've been here before. Not since Marissa and the Queen Mistress have inhabited it, but back when Joseppi used it more of his bachelor... how do you say it... bachelor pad?" Marcello looked to Summer and shrugged, hoping his English didn't mess up what he was trying to communicate.

Summer shook her head and chuckled lightly. So Julie had found a man even half way across the world to accommodate her lifestyle. "Let's do this." She instructed, and with that they both moved forward and up the hill.

Once they reached the house Summer immediately started to look around to make sure that they were actually alone. "Are you sure we are alone? No maids or pool boys hanging around?"

Marcello was getting a kick out of her paranoia. They had run over this plan about a million times before putting it into action, and he was pretty sure it was flawless. Placing his hands on his small hips and cocking one to the side, he raised his brows to her and just stared.

Summer turned to face him, her big brown eyes were wide and easily exposed her apprehension. She laughed once she saw him standing there and shook her head. "I can't believe I ever doubted that you were gay." They both laughed and Summer moved to the door. She checked to see if it was unlocked, and sure enough it was not. She figured that she always had to go for the easy route first. But this didn't deter her whatsoever. She grabbed Marcello by the end of his shirt and pulled him to the side of the house.

"Hey hey hey, be careful! This shirt cost a pretty fortune!" He proclaimed, practically running behind her to be sure the shirt didn't tear. Summer stopped and turned around, causing Marcello to bump into her.

"Oh sorry." She caught him, pushed him away from her and 'dusted' off his shirt. She knew what it was like to damage expensive clothing. "So the door was obviously just too easy. But I bet one of these windows will be unlocked. If I know Marissa, she always likes her fresh air, and she was never super responsible about keeping her things safe."

And sure enough as they rounded the corner to the side of the house, they saw a window just a couple inches open. Summer turned to her new friend and both of their eyes lit up. This time Summer didn't have to drag Marcello as they both took off in a jog towards the entrance. Once arriving Summer turned to Marcello and spoke. "Ok, so it's a little high, but all you have to do is hoist me up and I should be able to…"

Marcello interrupted her instantly and asked. "Wait, what?"

"You know, hoist… push me up, give me a hand?" She tried to change the word around so that he understood her.

Marcello made a face and shook his head. "I know what 'hoist' means honey. But you honestly think that I can push you up that high? My strength is not in my arms gorgeous, it's in my…"

"I don't want to know." It was Summer's turn to interrupt and she had no choice but to roll her eyes at him. She had grown to know him quite well in the last few days, she had an idea of what he just might say. "I'm not that heavy, come on just do it." She moved over to the edge of the house, preparing to reach up towards the window sill. But when she felt that Marcello was not falling behind her she shook her head. She looked at him and realized he wasn't any bigger than her, taller perhaps, but definitely NOT bigger.

"Ok fine, I'll hoist YOU up." She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him over to the window, getting down on one knee for him to stand on. "But if you ruin my new Herringbone Pants, I will seriously kick your scrawny ass." She stopped herself and suddenly realized just how much she sounded like she was talking to Cohen and she shook her head again.

"I'll take of my shoes." He said, to be sure that her pants were not ruined. Then he placed one hand on her shoulder and one foot on her knee. He turned to see where he could get a good grip, then turned back to look at her eyes. "Wait a minute..." He began, before actually attempting to get up.

"What is it? We are wasting precious time Marcy... " Summer was growing impatient, she just really wanted to go in and get the information she needed.

"Once I get inside, how will we get you up here?" He asked, making sure they had it all thought out before they moved on.

"As soon as I throw your bean stalk body up into that window, you can let me in through the front door." Summer said, and then reached down to grab his other foot to 'hoist him up'.

"Your a genius Roberts."

"Someone has to be." And with that, he placed his other foot into her hand, and with all her strength she pushed him up so that he could reach the window sill. He successfully grabbed on, and Summer smiled with satisfaction of her achievements. But for a moment, Marcello just kind of hung there. His legs swung back and forth as he tried to find something to use as leverage to get the rest of his body up.

It was a funny sight for Summer. Once he was partly up, she stood back and burst out laughing as his thin legs scrambled to find something to use. His shirts had inched up to expose part of his back, and for someone who was normally very smooth and confident, he looked too much like a fish out of water. After a few seconds of failed attempts he groaned. "Can you please help me?"

Summer laughed some more and moved over so that he could place his socked foot on her shoulder. Once he got a bit of footing, he pulled himself up and fell inside the room.

"OUCH!" He screamed and Summer smiled once more.

"Are you in?" She asked, placing her hands on her hips with a bit of a giggle escaping.

"If by in, you mean falling on my face onto a dusty hardwood floor… then yes I'm in."

"Good, now go to the front and let ME in." She heard another groan, and Summer leaned down to grab his shoes and run to the front door.

The next twenty minutes Summer and Marcello spent rummaging through the villa. They looked everywhere for any signs of good information as to the current state that Marissa was in. They had found some hospital paper work in a drawer in the office, but nothing more than the typical bills and slight explanation of what was done. All seemed to fit into Julie's explanation, but Summer wasn't fully convinced. As she sat on the floor going through a box of old papers, Marcello sat at the desk, looking for a key to open the safe in the corner of the room.

With his head practically inside the desk, he spoke up. "So Summer, I have a question for you." He prefaced his inquiry, hoping he could find out even more of the situation.

Without looking up, she continued to thumb through papers and responded. "We've been through this, I know I'm gorgeous enough to turn any man straight, but what will your friends think when you tell them you are going back to women?" She smirked slightly and looked up briefly to him.

Marcello met her eyes and shook his head. "Very funny smart ass. You are so cute, I almost don't want to tell you what I was _really _going to ask."

Summer just shrugged and the two of them giggled to themselves lightly. And then Summer looked up to him once more as if to tell him to go ahead with the real question.

"Well what I was really going to ask was this. From my understanding, you weren't Marissa's only friend. I understand why she hasn't made contact, she lost her memory and all. But why are you the first person in three years that has shown up looking for her?" Marcello looked back down at the desk, unsure if he should have dived that deep into the lives of these OC girls or not. He could tell by Summer's passion of this mission just how much Marissa meant to her, but surely there had to be more.

Summer thought about his question for a few moments as she continued to sift, and then finally spoke. "Honestly? I haven't figured it all out yet. I mean, I think it was just too hard for Ryan to keep hoping. Her absence was destroying him. Besides the fact that Julie told us to stay away, and made it pretty impossible for us to come in any contact with her, I have never seen Ryan the way that he was when he found out that Marissa had left."

She paused again and stopped what she was doing to continue; her gaze faded off to a wall as her memories were recalled. "He was an absolute mess. We almost thought that we were going to lose him. He didn't eat, didn't sleep. The only thing he did was study and sleep. But from the looks of it, that was pretty rare too. I mean one time when he came home for Thanksgiving I barely could recognize him. Trust me, Chino is a good looking guy, but this time he looked so… ill. His blue eyes seemed so dull, as if his soul had left his body."

She looked back to Marcello as he watched her intently. "I kept trying to urge Seth to get him to talk, you know to extract some emotion from him, but it was next to impossible." Summer sighed as she thought of how hard it was for him… for all of them, that first year. "Kirsten just kept telling us that he would come around. But even we knew that she doubted it herself." And then Summer went back to her box and began to look again. "I know what he went through, because I did too, its just… Ah-ha… here is something!" She quickly changed the subject when she finally pulled out a doctor's note that had been written on a piece of prescription stationary. It was to Julie, which Summer thought was somewhat odd.

"Julie…" she began to read. "...We need to discuss Marissa's state in private, please set up a separate appointment to come in without her. Signed Jacomo." She made a face and looked up to Marcello. "Eww she is on a first name basis with her daughter's doctor?"

At first Marcello frowned. He wanted to know more about this Ryan character, and why he wasn't here with Summer looking for his lost love. Summer had already filled him in on Ryan, Marissa, that guy Volchok, and what led her to being in Italy. But there was so much more that he wanted to know. But as soon as Summer started to read the note, he left his position at the desk and joined her on the floor.

"I wonder why the doctor wanted to see her alone? I mean, what couldn't he say in front of Marissa?" Marcello wondered out loud and looked to Summer for some explanations.

"Don't look at me, I only know what she did with MY dad while they were alone. And with the way she convinced him to do things, I don't want to know anything more." She shuddered at the thought and then smiled. "But I bet the doctor could tell us some more." With that, she put folded up the piece of paper and shoved it in the pocket of her pants. Then she stood up, put the box back into the drawer where she found it and motioned for Marcello to follow her. "Let's go look in Marissa's room once more. How much time do we have?"

Marcello looked at his watch as they headed out of the room. "I'd say about ten more minutes before they return. But with what you have told me about Julie Cooper, I don't want to risk getting caught. We better make it five."

Summer nodded in agreement. "Don't worry, the only thing you will be scared of if we come face to face with Julie Cooper is a rage blackout from me. And I'm not sure we know each other well enough for you to witness that yet."

Marcello laughed and shook his head in concurrence. "I think I might have seen one when you were talking to Seth and I'll definitely pass."

"That wasn't a rage blackout, it was just foreplay." She smiled and moved into the room that Marcello first fell into. The one that was obviously Marissa's.

"You are kidding right?" Marcello asked as he stood in the door way. But when Summer just shrugged his question off he shivered slightly. He decided that changing the subject might be the best way to go again. "So Ryan was in pretty bad shape when Marissa left?"

Summer began opening her best friend's drawers once again to search for some kind of clues. The bad part was, she wasn't sure what she was looking for. "I wouldn't even know where to begin to tell you. Marissa and Ryan's relationship was one very complicated connection. For three years their drama could have easily filled all the drama of seven seasons of the Valley. They were on again, off again for a long time, but even when they were off they were still in love. It was bitter sweet, and none of us really knew how they would end up. I love my girl, but she was a mess. I would kind of describe them as a quintessential damsel in distress with a knight in not always so shining armor."

Marcello nodded, knowing a couple like that himself, and understanding exactly where she was coming from. "But they loved each other right?"

"Never stopped. They went through so much together, I just think that the last break that they had was needed to catch their breath." Summer continued the tale of her best friends and then moved to the other side of the room to look through the end table next to her bed. "They both made mistakes, and when the accident happened Marissa was actually going to leave to try to sort through her life. As much as I didn't want to see her go, I think it was the best choice she had ever made."

"And Ryan was the one there with her… when she… well you know?" Marcello continued to inquire, trying to get it all straight in his head.

"He was the last one that got to speak with her. She.. she lost consciousness in his arms." She paused for a moment and had to stop. Talking about this was bringing up some pretty horrible memories and along with them came the severe emotions, the ones she often tried to hide with rage blackouts. But they were also the same ones that had driven her to come to Italy. "The thing is, he wouldn't talk about what had happened really. Sandy, that's his adopted dad, had to pry it out of him who even did it so that they could press charges against that creep that did it."

She turned around to see Marcello sitting on Marissa's queen sized, canopy bed, listening intently to her every word. "Ryan has had a hard life to begin with, and to say that he broods would be an understatement. But I have never seen him like that before. He was so broken, so devastated. It was as if part of his own being was stolen from him."

She took a deep breath and tried to continue. "I think he blamed himself for a long time, and just the fact that he couldn't do anything to save her. It killed him inside… it killed all of us. He had always been there to save her, and this time he just couldn't." A small tear started to form in the corner of her eye and she quickly blinked it away. "He retreated into himself for over a year. We were all really scared for him. Seth and I… we tried to move on with our lives. And I think I did a pretty good job. I distracted myself with school and him. But Ryan… his passion was gone. And until he found Isabella, we wondered if he would ever love again." Finally one tear escaped and she let it roll down her delicate cheek and off her chin. As it did, she looked down to where Marcello's foot hung over the bed.

"What is that?" She pointed to something that was sticking out under the bed.

He blinked, being snapped back into reality. He was getting lost in her story, realizing just how much impact this all had on his new friend. "What is what, Bella?" He turned looked down at his body and around him to try to figure out what she was talking about.

"THAT!" She moved over to his side and bent down to where a leather bound book had been peaking out of its hiding place.

Marcello immediately stood up and stood beside Summer to look at her findings. "It's her journal!"

Summer looked up to him, a look of uncertainty evident upon her face. As much as she wanted to open it up and read every word, she knew that it was an invasion of privacy. Her conscious was getting in the way of finding out the truth.

"Are you going to open it?" Marcello urged her on with great anticipation.

"I don't know, can I really do that?" Summer asked, her eyes pleading with him to give her an answer.

"Of course you can! This is a matter of finding the truth, not spying on your best friends secrets of what she did with her boyfriend last night. Though that could be pretty juicy too, have you taken a look at that beau she hangs around with?"

Before Summer could open her mouth to ask any more questions she heard some voices coming from the front entrance of the house. And suddenly both Summer and Marcello had forgotten about their emotions as well as the question of if it was right to take Marissa's journal or not. They looked at each other with wide eyes and just as Marcello opened his mouth in terror, Summer clasped her own hand over his mouth and put a finger up to her own to tell him to stay quiet. Then, without thinking she thrust the journal into his arms and took off towards the door.

"Summer we can't jump out of here, it's too high." He spoke in a panicked whisper.

"Would you stop you pansy, just get on the edge and jump down!" She started pushing him towards the window but he hesitated.

"You go first." He instructed her as he attempted to stay away from the window. Summer shook his head with frustration. And just as she was about to get into the window they heard more voices.

"I'm going to go lay down for a few minutes Mom, will you let me know when Bray gets here?" Marissa's faint voice could be heard down the hall.

Then out of pure fright, the both of them practically dived towards the window. There was a bit of a fight as to who would jump first, both wanting to get out as fast as they could. But in the end Summer stood back and let Marcello jump out first. As soon as it was clear she started to get into the window. Once she positioned herself with her legs dangling out first she could hear Marissa's foot steps come closer, she took one last glance back and jumped into the grass below her.

At the same time Marissa entered her room. She performed a double take at the window as soon as she came across the threshold. Did she just see what she thought she saw? Not only did she imagine a face in her window, which would be impossible, due to the fact that it was a good eight feet above the ground, but she could have sworn that face was someone she knew.

Quickly Marissa moved over to the window and peered out it. But there was no one insight. She blinked and shook her head. "You are going crazy Cooper." She laughed at herself and moved back over to her bed, plopping down and sighing. "I need some sleep."

"Seth, I need some sleep." Isabella complained as she lay on the Cohen's couch watching old movies on low volume, trying to take a quick cat nap before everyone else came home.

Seth who was at the end of the couch, talking in a one sided conversation to Isabella about his latest idea for Atomic County, completely ignored her request to leave her alone for twenty minutes while the others went for Thai food, and spoke up again. "What's the matter Izz, is Ryan keeping you up late at night? I have always wondered how he was with the endurance factor. I mean I usually can only go for about…" Seth got lost in his own world and Isabella kicked him playfully in his side to get him to stop.

"SETH! I don't think that Summer would appreciate you telling me about your sex life, and frankly neither would Ryan if I told you. So I think we will just leave it at the fact that I have been working two jobs all summer, and I'm just exhausted." Part of that was the truth, the other part was the fact that she was up all night long listening to Ryan toss and turn. She didn't know what was on his mind, but he didn't sleep a wink. And in return, neither did she.

"You are absolutely right Isabella. I have to remember to think like a woman. It would save me so much time and … pain! You are in fact a woman, and understand Summer far better than I ever could. So maybe I can ask you a few questions later." He paused to actually look at her and smile. "There really is a huge difference between men and women. Have you ever read that book, _Men are from Mars, Woman are from Venus?_ Not that I have, but I hear it's really interesting." He didn't even notice, as he rambled on and on that Isabella had given up on trying to take a power nap, and returned to the sitting position next to Seth. "Thank you once again for saving me from the wraith of Summer's rage blackouts. Even from all the way in Europe I don't think I could escape from them. And of course here I have to deal with Ryan. Who I have to admit isn't quite as scary as he once was, but I still wouldn't want to brush my shoulder against his fist by any means…"

Isabella just laughed and flowed into the conversation. "How is Summer doing in Europe? Has she done a lot of shopping and sight seeing?" Isabella crossed her legs up under her, and used the remote to turn off the television. She decided that if you can't beat him, you might as well join him right? Besides she was genuinely interested in hearing about Summer's trip. She couldn't wait to go to Europe some day.

"I don't think she really has gotten much shopping in. Not with looking for Marissa and letting her new boy toy oogle her with his eyes. Do you think that letting some guy oogle you should be consider cheating? If not, maybe I should consider stripping for the rest of the summer. I bet Hailey can get me in at that place in LA. I don't need the money, but it would be a lot of fun."

"Wait, Summer is looking for Marissa?" Isabella's eyes widened. She knew who Marissa was, she was Summer's best friend, but she didn't know the entire story. Most of the time, whenever her name was brought up people fell silent. It was as if her name was banned from any topic of conversation on the West Coast. At least with around Ryan it was. Last year, when she came home with Ryan for Thanksgiving, she overheard part of a conversation between Sandy and Kirsten. So she knew that she was in an accident and lost her memory, but that was about the gist of it.

"What? How did you know?" Seth looked surprised, completely unaware that he had just spilled the beans. "I thought Summer only trusted ME with her secrets!"

"Seth, you just told me!" Isabella griped and laughed lightly. But the look of worry on Seth's face made her concerned. "What is it Seth?"

"Summer is so going to kiss Marcy!" He stood up in horror and began pacing the room. "If she finds out that I told you where she is and what she is doing I am a dead man. No wonder they never trust me with anything. But I did so well this time. I mean I kept it from him didn't I? For almost an entire month even. That has to be a record or something. It HAS to get me some sort of sympathy points." Seth continued to ramble and pace at the same time.

And during his tantrum Isabella watched him go back and forth, trying to take in everything that he was saying. Why was he freaking out so much? Isabella was a smart girl, and she knew that there was more to the Marissa story than Ryan let on. Still, at the same time, she never wanted to believe that he still wasn't over her. They were an old high school fling, but was there more? She shook her head and turned her attention back to Seth, who was still pacing and freaking out.

"SETH!" She screamed to get his attention.

Seth suddenly jumped and looked to her with confusion. He looked as if it was the first time he realized she was in the room. "Yeah?"

"Calm down. Summer is all the way across the world, and she has no idea you just told me. In fact, I don't even know what it is exactly that you let slip. Don't you think you are overreacting just a bit?" She looked at him, studying his reaction carefully. With her legs still crossed under her, she sat there waiting for a response.

Seth shook his head nervously and moved back over to his brother's girlfriend, joining her on the couch once more. He looked deep into her green eyes and lowered his voice, to let her know just how serious this was. "You have no idea what I have just done, Isabella. I mean she made it perfectly clear what would happen if I let this slip. And normally when I mess up, I can beg and pout before pulling out the big guns and perform some sort of grand gesture to make her forgive me. I even had one picked out last semester for the next time something like this happened. Luckily I haven't had to use it. But the thing is, she is in Italy and this gesture won't exactly work via cell phones or emails."

Isabella smiled lightly, momentarily forgetting about what Seth had just told her, to focus on calming his nerves. "Seth, it's ok, I know how to keep a secret. This doesn't have to leave my lips." She placed her hand lightly on his shoulder to reassure him.

"Really? Because you have no idea what the repercussions are of this mistake. I don't think you have ever really seen Summer mad." Seth shook his head up and down extremely slowly, trying to make her realize that Summer was NOT one to mess with.

Isabella smiled and shook her head yes again. But Seth's words only made her want to know more. What was it that Summer was doing that had to be kept such a secret. Visiting an old friend was a good thing right? She opened her mouth to speak, to ask more questions, but before she had the chance the front door swung open reveling that the rest of the family had come back home.

"Food's here." Boomed Sandy as he, Kirsten and Ryan came through the door carrying bags of Thai food and a couple of other grocery bags.

"You are the best Isabella, no wonder Ryan loves you so much." Seth leaned over and hugged Isabella quickly and then bounced off of the couch, his mood completely changing as he headed towards the kitchen. "Hurry up, I'm starving, and did you know we are out of any of the really good snacks?"

Isabella laughed lightly and turned to get up. As she did she was confronted with a smiling Ryan. "Should I be jealous? I didn't know you were only using me to get to Seth."

"Well I didn't want to hurt your feelings right away." Isabella moved closer so that she could wrap her arms around her boyfriend's neck.

At the same time, his strong arms wrapped around her waist, and he brought her body to his. Lowering his head he smiled and moved his lips closer to hers. "Maybe I'll have to fight him for you. I think I can take him."

"Are you sure about that? I hear he has some kick ass ninja moves up his sleeve." And with that she could no longer resist, pressing her full lips against his, and melting into his arms. Just as Ryan let his tongue press between her lips to enter her mouth to massage her own, they were interrupted by a loud voice.

"The force, I'd use the force! Come on guys, stop making out, we are hungry." Seth complained from all the way into the kitchen.

Isabella pulled back with a laugh. "Come on Lothario, before Seth starves." She grabbed him by the hand and started to pull him away.

But Ryan wasn't budging. He used his strength to pull her back to their original positions, and forcefully pressed his lips against hers once more. This time though he pressed his body more firmly into hers and let his hands snake around to her bottom. As he did, Isabella could feel her skin warm and her heart flutter. Ryan pulled back with a smile, feeling the way that he effected her. "I can live with him starving if this is what I get in return."

Isabella smiled and then they laughed when they heard Seth yell, "I heard that!" Then with much reluctance the couple turned and walked hand in hand into the kitchen, where the five of them sat down to a meal of Thai food and laughter. All the while, Isabella was dying to know more.


	7. The Hidden Issues

_Chapter Seven: The Hidden Issues_

Looking down, a young brunette woman sat alone on the edge of the extremely soft king sized bed, in the place in which she temporarily inhabited. Her petite hand ran gently and slowly across something in her lap, as she studied the object in front of her. It was a simple entity from the outside, one that someone passing by might not think to look at. But the girl knew that it contained something authentic and important within its barriers, something she wasn't sure she was prepared to see. She couldn't believe that she had had this much restraint thus far. She was dying to unfold what was before her, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. If she did, could she ever be trusted again? She wasn't absolutely sure that she could justify her actions, even if they did seem legit to her. And so instead of opening it, she continued to sit still and stare, her brain never ceasing to churn over the possibilities.

"So after we have lunch with my mother, I think that she and I are going to go shopping down town." Marissa started to explain her day's events to her boyfriend.

"Sounds like a plan, it's been awhile since you and your mother have had bonding time." Bray nodded as they continued.

"That's because SOMEONE hogs all of my existence." Marissa grinned and leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, so that he knew that she was just kidding. She would much rather spend time with Bray than her mother any day. But truth was, ever since she had woken up from the coma, she actually spent the majority of the time with just one person, herself. She was a far off resemblance from the Social Chair she once was. "But if you want, you can meet us again for dinner."

"Sounds like a plan."

The couple was walking hand and hand down the ancient stone streets in Rome. It was a vivid sun filled day, with not a cloud in the sky. It was also extremely warm. Due to no clouds, the sun's rays had nothing to filter through, and they were blatantly beating down on Marissa's bare back. She wore a simple styled halter top, one that crisscrossed in the front and tied around the back. The designer shirt left her back completely exposed and the front fitting snuggly to show off her small rounded breasts. Showing off all different shades of greens, it was accompanied with a short white skirt and matching keds flats. Bray was clad in a fitting pair of Burberry jeans that were rolled up at the ankle. On top he sported a baby blue button up, with again the sleeves rolled up. They looked classy, and certainly were a head turning couple, especially among the sea of black dressed Italians.

They had just spent some time in the Vatican City, where they took a trip up to the top of the Vatican Dome to look out over the city of Rome. It was one of the most breathtaking views Marissa had ever remembered seeing. Not to mention very romantic. This is how they had been spending their time all summer long. Bray had urged Marissa to actually explore the city she had lived in for three years. This of course was in hopes to help her take the focus off of her elapsed past and progress with the future; hopefully a future with him. He only had one year left of university in Italy, and then he was planning on returning to England; and if she agreed, he wanted to bring her with him. But these were plans only conversed in his head; he wasn't going to spring it upon her yet. He knew how she got when they spoke of her past, or even their future. She had a problematical time making plans without knowing her past for some reason. And so Bray believed that it was better for their relationship to live in the present. And so as she did, he pretended to follow along without pressuring her too much. But he was definitely working on her, and with his request she had agreed to finally explore Rome and other small villages in Italy. By doing so, the two of them were enjoying their summer holiday by doing many touristy things that Marissa had ceased to do since she had lived there. However Bray's plan in helping her let go of the past was still unapparent if it had begun to work or not.

Finally, after a little bit more flirting and strolling along the side walk she stopped as they reached the outside of the restaurant they had become so familiar with. "Well this is my stop." Marissa spoke as she turned to face Bray with a crafty smile.

Bray smirked slightly and looked her up and down. "What is that smile for love?"

Marissa shrugged her shoulders and leaned into him. The sun was so bright she had to squint her baby blues into slits. "Nothing, I just had a really good time today." She leaned in and wrapped her arms around his torso tightly.

Bray took in a deep breath, as he breathed in her scent. He wrapped his arms around her lower back and held her so close, that it raised her a bit off the ground. He was crazy about this girl. It was odd because he wasn't sure he would be once Julie explained to him the situation and all the drama. But he had grown to truly care about her, and now he was afraid of losing her. "Are you actually going to try to get along with your mother today?" He asked as he tilted his head back to look at her tanned face.

Marissa loved it when he held her like that. It didn't make her problems and issues go away, but it sure did make them feel better. "That depends." She spoke as she finally took a step back with a shrug. "I can't promise anything if she annoys me." She stated flatly and without regret.

Bray just shook his and laughed lightly. He would be the first one to admit that Julie Cooper could sometimes be a handful. But at the same time, he didn't quite understand the resentment that Marissa held for her. Especially when it was obvious to him that she loved her. "You need to go easy on her Marissa, you know she loves you."

It was Marissa's turn to roll her eyes. She backed away from him with irritation. "Bray, don't tell me how to deal with my mother." She didn't even know why, but this frustrated her beyond anything. If it wasn't Julie telling her how to act and what to do, it was Bray. She looked and met his big brown eyes. He returned her gaze with sadness. He hadn't met to upset her.

But before Bray could open his mouth to apologize or even to defend himself, Marissa interrupted. "I'm gonna go, I'll talk to you later." And with that Bray leaned forward to kiss her again, but Marissa turned her face so that his lips pressed on her cheek, and she turned to enter the restaurant.

Bray was left there to gawk at her as she walked away. He was confused. What had he said to make her suddenly turn so cold to him? He watched until her thin frame disappeared into the restaurant. And then he allowed himself to blink and look away.

In the mean time, as Marissa made her exit, and was growing more irritated. She hadn't met to take out her frustration on Bray, but lately it seemed to always be happening. She snapped at him, when he tried to help her out. But she knew that he was trying to get her to forget about her past. And that killed her. Didn't he realize how important it was to her? No, he obviously didn't understand. She didn't have a choice in the matter. She HAD forgotten her past. And it slaughtered her within. She didn't feel complete or authentic. And between him and her mother, she felt like she didn't even have control over the present. Maybe that was another reason why she couldn't sleep with him. There were other reasons, the fact that she didn't feel like she could give herself to anyone, when she didn't know what she was giving. Including the idea that every other guy she had slept with, Luke & Koby, had cheated on her. But lastly because this was the ONE last thing that she had control over. Her body.

Trying desperately to forget her aggravation, a moody Marissa moved into the restaurant just in time to see her mother making out with Joseppi. She immediately covered her eyes and groaned. "Ugggh, you guys are too old for that." She didn't hesitate to say her opinions, and slipped into the chair in the empty table where she and her mother always sat.

Julie immediately jumped back, with a sheepish grin played across her face. It didn't seem to bother her that her daughter had just caught her making out with him. It made her feel young and lively. Besides, he had come along way from the man he once was when she first met him. Although he didn't lack for imagination between the sheets and in the confines of their room, getting him to kiss her in his restaurant was something else. "Oh Marissa, stop being such a prude, you're just jealous Bray isn't here for you to make out with."

However, as soon as Joseppi saw Marissa he blushed slightly. He had never dated anyone with a daughter before, let alone one as grown as she was. "You're never to old for a little hanky panky." He spoke in his truest Italian accent. Then he moved over and kissed Marissa on the cheek in a fatherly manner and then stepped away. "Ladies, I will leave you be."

As he walked away Marissa laughed. "And the fact that he used the term 'hanky panky' proves my point."

She was now shaking. The same brunette woman was slumped over on the edge of the bed, holding the object tightly in front of her and between her fingers. It was as if she allowed herself to loosen up she would do something she truly regretted. This was absolutely killing her. Did it really matter what was in this small object? Couldn't she come to conclusions on her own? Or even just ask the person it involved directly. She knew it wasn't easy, but if she carefully and deliberately asked the right questions, she surely could do it. But what if she didn't receive the right answers? What if she wasn't trusted with the real information? She knew that this object held the truth. Or at least it contained clues that lead her to the truth. She wouldn't have had it in her possession now if that wasn't the case.

Slowly she sat it down on the bed. She just couldn't do it. As much as she wanted to know, it wasn't right. She stared at it for a brief moment and than shot up off the bed, trying desperately to forget about it.

"Marissa, are you really going to put ALL those carbs into your body?" Julie sat and watched as Marissa took a large bite of spaghetti. It seemed she had finally gotten her appetite back from the other day. Perhaps her frustration made her hungrier. Julie's eyes grew wide, wondering just how her daughter ate what she ate, and still kept her lean figure. She had to admit, she was pretty jealous.

Marissa chewed and swallowed her bite before taking a drink of the wine in front of her and washing it down. "Would you make up your mind Mom? First you yell at me for not having an appetite, and now you are complaining about me eating too much." She shook her head and leaned back in her chair, wiping her mouth on a cloth napkin and putting it back into her lap. "Besides, we're in Italy, when are you going to finally embrace the culture?"

Julie looked down to her salad that contained spinach, other greens and cold shrimp. She then smiled and looked back up to her daughter. "Oh honey, I embrace it just fine." Julie's gazed turned towards the kitchen and then moved back to her grown daughter. Her lips turned into a devious smirk and she took a bite of own lunch.

Marissa made a face when she realized what Julie was talking about and spoke with disgust, "Ewww." She laughed and then suddenly stopped. Where did that word come from? She looked up to the red haired woman across from her with wide eyes, but Julie hadn't seemed to flinch. Marissa hadn't seen Summer in years, and hadn't been friends with her for even longer, so this surprised her when she used the word in the way that her long time best friend had. She had sounded just like her.

Julie decided to change the subject, and began jabbering aimlessly away about something selfish, and Marissa's mind began to wander….

_It was a typical Newport party; consisting of the most popular kids finding yet another reason to get together and revel it up while getting wasted and using their bodies to grind against one another like the true horny teenagers that they were. Although it was years and years go, Marissa remembered it like it was yesterday. Perhaps it was because she lost so much of her memory. But the stuff she did remember seemed so clear. Girls were clad in nothing more than string bikinis and maybe a small cover up here or there. The beach house was decorated with sporadic white Christmas lights hanging on the walls, but it was the crowd that truly bejeweled it. It was a scene straight out a richer and younger version of the playboy mansion. Although the clothes were practically non existent, they were at the very least designer. But Marissa stood out. Instead of wearing her beach clothes she had on her favorite pair of low rise boot cut jeans. They hugged her hips and bottom perfectly. Just enough to show off her small curves. Her tank top was a red and grey horizontally striped. It was form fitting and short enough to show just a sliver of her mid drift. Although she was covered more than anyone else, she wasn't a prude; the plummeting 'U' shape the cut of the shirt made, was held together only by crisscrossed string over her small breasts. She didn't know it, but she looked perfect. _

_The party was held at Holly's house just after their yearly fashion show, and Marissa had already spiked her drink with her personal stash of her favorite poison of choice: Vodka. Just when she thought the party was going to be just like any other she saw him. She smiled and moved over to greet the new boy in town._

_Ryan who other than Seth was the only one still wearing his suit. He saw her approaching and spoke first. "Hey." It was a simple greeting, but in his eyes it held so much more_

"_Hey." She responded back. Marissa remembered thinking how different he was. She was intrigued, and wanted to know more. _

"_So, what do you think of Newport?" She continued the conversation with a smile. She took Ryan's drink from him, helping herself to his supply. Sure she was with Luke, and of course she would never let anything happen beyond simple flirting. But he was different, and she craved the distinction he offered. _

_His blue eyes met hers, and a smirk fell across his face. "I think I can get in less trouble where I'm from." Before she could open her mouth to respond to his comment, Holly interrupted their conversation from the card table. "Hey Coop, it's your turn to deal."_

_She knew she couldn't get out of it. She had a reputation to uphold, and friends to please. But she couldn't leave without a closing remark. "You have no idea."_

_She gave him another smile and turned to leave him, leaving him to watch her go. _

In reality Julie was still rambling on and on. But Marissa didn't hear a word. A smile fell upon her face and her memory continued…

_Marissa was from afar now. But her eyes were still upon Ryan. The only thing separating them was a pack of nearly identical looking blondes all talking on their cell phones. But Marissa still managed to watch him. There was something about him that drew her to him. It was hard to explain. But she didn't have to. Right now her thoughts were merely in her head. And just as her eyes had found his again, Summer's petite body came between them. _

"_Look …who I found." A very drunk Summer approached Ryan with more than just words, with a provocative look. As she tried to flaunt her own bikini clad body, she spilled some of her beer upon Ryan. "Ooops, I'm wasted."_

_Ryan didn't respond verbally. He bent down to brush off the suit, Summer tried to 'help him' by rubbing her hands along his chest. He just looked from her and then around, hoping that Seth or Marissa weren't watching. And Summer continued with playing him, 'hot' by wrapping her hands around his neck. From her spot in the room Marissa eyed her best friend. What was she doing? A ping of jealousy was felt in her gut, yet she tried immediately to dismiss it. _

"_So, what's your name anyway" Summer asked the blonde beau, her eyes still burning into him._

"_Ryan."_

_A larger smile spread across her face, and she repeated his name in her head as she ran her hands across his firm chest. _

_As Ryan continued to try to push her away, Marissa continued to watch. She wanted to stop her friend from embarrassing herself. Or was there something more to it. But before she could even interrupt Seth Cohen intervened. _

"_Ryan, you've got to come…" He stopped as soon as he saw what was going on. "What are you doing?" Seth stared at his new friend with the love of his life not holding back that he was obviously quite upset._

_Ryan tried to pull away again, and this time succeeded. "Hey… ummm."_

"_Excuse me!" Summer tried to ignore the guy she barely recognized. She was insulted and offended that Ryan just brushed her off. _

_But that didn't stop the conversation between the boys. Seth continued, "What are you doing? I named my boat after her."_

_And suddenly Summer's attention was caught. "What? Eww, who ARE you?"_

_And now it was time for Ryan to ignore Summer. He needed to explain what was going on. Marissa was watching it still from a few feet away still unnoticed. Ryan spoke quietly, "It's not what you think. She's just a little bit drunk."_

_Summer didn't seem to care, she came up behind Ryan and wrapped her arms around his neck once more, this time from behind. "Come on, Ryan."_

_Seth started to walk away, and Ryan tried to stop him. " Seth, Seth…Seth"_

_But it was official, Seth was betrayed once again and this time he wouldn't stand for it. He pushed him with all his might, causing Ryan to actually stumble a few steps back falling into something. "You know what, why don't you just go back to Chino? I'm sure there's a really nice car in the parking lot that you could steal." _

_And that is when Seth disappeared out of the house and down to the beach. Ryan stood there a bit dumb founded. But by then they had caused quite a scene, and Marissa wasn't the only one watching. The awkward silence was only broken by Summer's all too familiar catch phrase._

_She laughed and spoke up. "Chino? Ewww."_

_That was Ryan tried to get away from the stares and whispers. He turned to get out, and nearly bumped right into Marissa. She chose to just look away and Ryan took off after Seth._

The memory was perfectly lucid. She smiled to herself as she remembered that first night and how it was the start of her friendship with the kid from Chino. Ryan had come to Newport and shook things up for her. She couldn't help but reminisce about how she had helped Seth take him to the model home, or how when she and Luke took a break, she almost fell for him. He was different, and she loved it. There were never any judgments from either of them. And Marissa remembered the spark she felt every time he touched her. She still couldn't believe they ended up going to her Katilion together. The look on her mother's face was priceless. She had started to second guess her perfectly planned out life with Luke. And if it wasn't for Ryan, she might not ever doubt it. She knew that deep down she wanted him. She was just scared. Could she really leave the life she had with Luke, the life she had known her entire life? As much as she wanted to, she couldn't help but still be scared. But it didn't matter, nothing happened between them anyway.

She continued to wonder what would have happened if she hadn't messed up in Tijuana. Could she and Ryan have ended up together? She knew things were over with Luke as soon as she found out about him and Holly, but how did she end up with Koby? Was seeing Marissa in the dingy alley way too much for Ryan to handle? She couldn't blame him if it was. She was a mess, and there was no reason to bring him into that life. It was just a shame that Marissa slept with Luke in the first place. Maybe her and Ryan could have been something more than friends and Marissa would have never went through the pain Luke put her through. Maybe then she could have truly let Ryan comfort her when she found out about her parents divorce. He could have been the thing that changed her. They seemed to be on that track even before Marissa broke up with Luke. But what happened? She didn't know, and her mom never seemed to mention him. And whenever she asked, Julie just responded by saying she had no idea because after TJ he wasn't really in the picture. Maybe if her and Summer ever did talk again, she could ask her. It wasn't important, it was her history, her silly youth. And yet she still wanted to know every detail of her lost memory. But it was no use. Her and Summer were no longer friends, and as much as she wanted to try, too much time had passed. She may just never know. Was it time to accept that?

"Marissa, are you even listening to any word I just said?" Julie tapped her manicured finger nails on the table in front of her, waiting to see what her daughter's explanation would be this time. But she saw something on her face, she hadn't seen in a really long time… a real smile. But it wasn't just any smile. It seemed… old.

"Oh sorry." Marissa apologized and then looked up to her mom.

_Did she just say she was sorry?_ Julie thought to herself. She looked to her daughter strangely and waited for more of an explanation. Marissa rarely apologized for her actions.

"So you know what's strange?" Marissa began, and took another bite of her now cool spaghetti. Once she realized it wasn't hot anymore, she pushed it away from her and crossed her arms loosely over her stomach.

"You mean, besides the way that you are acting right now?" Julie's eyes widened and stared one more time at her. "Marissa honey, you haven't been acting like yourself, is everything ok?"

Marissa sighed. Not only because her mom wouldn't just leave her alone. The way she saw it, she had been acting funny for the last three years. But then again, she really wouldn't know now would she? She had no idea what she was supposed to act like. But she was also annoyed that she was interrupted in her thoughts. So she decided to ignore her Mom's statement and continue.

"The other day, I must have been hallucinating…" Marissa laughed at the way her mind played tricks on her. "I walked into my room, and looked out the window."

Julie sat there, quiet, waiting to hear what had gotten Marissa so amused. She crossed her legs, and started tapping her foot up and down.

"And for a moment I could have sworn I saw Summer Roberts staring in through the frame." Marissa laughed and reached out to take another sip of her wine.

Julie's eyes widened and she felt as if her heart had suddenly stopped. Uncomfortably she let out a strange sounding laugh and shook her head in disbelief. "Why on earth would you think that you saw her? First of all your window is like eight feet off the ground. Secondly, there is no reason for her to be here." _Nor, no way that she could find us. Right? _She thought to herself inside her frantic running mind. The once easy going Julie had suddenly become very paranoid.

Marissa stopped with her story, and started to pick up on her mother's bizarre actions. She laughed and leaned forward to look at her, as if she was studying her more closely? "Are you ok?" She laughed and shook her head. "Of course she couldn't be there, I guess some of my dreams must be transferring into my day dreams. I wonder what Doctor Bryce would say about that one." Marissa shrugged it off. She really did think it was just an illusion her crazy mind had made up. But it was Julie who was now worried.

"I'm sure it is normal to think you are seeing people of your past? Especially when that is all you think about." Julie said sternly, unfolding her crossed legs and sighing. "Marissa, you really need to stop worrying about what your mind has lost. Have you ever thought that just maybe your memories have vanished for a reason? You are going to drive yourself mad if you keep this up."

Marissa looked gravely at her mother. She really didn't understand did she? No matter how hard she tried, Julie Cooper would never get her daughter. And for sake of not getting into it in her mother's boyfriends restaurant, Marissa decided just to agree. "You are right Mom." Her words were cold and flat. She finished off her wine and looked away. "I just thought it was kind of funny. Sometimes I think about her, and what she is up to." She admitted. She knew that her and Summer had had a falling out, but she couldn't help but miss her. Even if she did sleep with Koby.

At a table near by, Marcello was watching the two women eating and interacting with a curious face. He had been spending the night with Summer in her hotel on a regular basis. Really the only time he wasn't with her was when he had to work. Today he had wanted to call in sick, to spend time with her, and crack open that journal he had been trying to convince her to read. But it was no use and Summer hadn't budged. And furthermore she had insisted that he went to work, because he needed to make money to come visit her when she returned to the states. But Marcello couldn't help but think she just wanted to read the journal by herself.

And now he was excited that Summer had pushed him off to his job. He was lucky enough to be the one to wait on Julie and Marissa, and for the first time he truly paid attention to every word they said. Maybe he would be able to find out some things on his own. But to his dismay, the only things he had found out thus far was that they didn't really get along very well, Marissa seemed to be having some trouble with Bray, and Julie… well Julie was just Julie: overly demanding, completely self involved and without a clue as to how to make her daughter happy. It seemed nothing could falter her demeanor either. And just as he was about to give up, and think that they really did lead a boring life, Marcello's ears perked up when he heard Summer's name.

Marcello moved closer to the table, using the excuse to fill their water glasses to get a better sound. He hadn't heard what was said, or why she was talking about her, but he wouldn't miss a word now. He started with Marissa's glass first, flashing her an all too charming smile. And he actually thought that in the midst of glaring at her mother, she offered him one back.

"Well of course you think of her Marissa, she was your best friend for practically your entire life. But please don't forget that she isn't to be trusted, you know what she did to you." Julie was pulling out the big guns here, she couldn't risk Marissa wanting to come in contact with her best friend after all this time. Only trouble could truly come of that.

Marcello's eyes grew wide, and now he was even more anxious to hear more. What could she possibly have done to ruin Marissa's trust? The Summer that he knew would have done anything for her best friend and nothing at all to hurt her. And the way she talked about her, the two of them had an amazing relationship.

"No mother, actually I don't really know what she did to me." Marissa began, with aggravation in her voice. She didn't care at all that she might be putting on quite the show to their waiter. "Sure you have told me, but I don't even remember any of it. You keep telling me to move on from the past I have forgotten. But wouldn't that include conveniently ignoring what Summer did? I don't even know why she did it, in case YOU have forgotten I don't really talk to anyone from back home and I have no idea why!"

Marcello's eyes grew wider than they ever had before and it was going to be hard to put on the front that he wasn't interested. As he heard Marissa explain to her mother her frustration, his mind began to wander and he forgot that he was currently pouring Julie's water. It had begun to over flow onto the table and by the time he when he finally realized what he was doing he jerked up, causing the glass to fall over into Julie's lap.

Julie yelped and jumped up out of her seat, knocking her knees into the table, causing everything to rattle and the glass to shatter loudly onto the floor. Suddenly Marcello wasn't the ONLY one watching the two American girls.

"You clumsy little idiot!" She managed to get out in the middle of her scream. "Look what you have done! Do you have any idea how expensive this suit was?" She looked down onto her now soaked lap.

Marcello opened his mouth to tell her exactly how much the suit had cost but was interrupted by a chuckle coming from the other side of the table.

Marissa couldn't help but laugh, and didn't bother covering her mouth to stifle it. "Relax Mom, I am sure that Marcello didn't mean it. Besides its only water, and as many times as I have wanted to test the theory that you are the wicked witch of the west, I am sure that you unfortunately will not melt."

Marcello turned to Marissa and smiled once more, she knew who he was, and had remembered his name. He knew that he liked this girl for a reason.

But with Marissa's words, it only caused Julie to fall into an even bigger outrage. Not only was she paranoid beyond anything, she now looked like she had wet herself and her own daughter was making fun of her.

"I don't need to stand here and listen to my own daughter make fun of me." Julie used her napkin to try to soak up some of the water.

"Oh don't worry Mother, you don't need me to help you with that." This time it was Marcello who had laughed out loud, but at least he had the decency to cover his mouth, shocked but his lack of control over his emotions.

"Oh just lovely." Julie began. "Marissa, be ready in ten minutes, we are leaving as soon as I go and get cleaned up." And with that Julie stormed off yelling Joseppi's name, and definitely causing an even bigger scene than before.

With the red haired woman now gone, Marissa and Marcello were left there giggling softly to themselves. Marcello moved down to begin to pick up the glass pieces and Marissa stopped him.

"Let me." She moved over to where she knew they kept the broom and dust pan, and began to help him clean up.

Marcello stood there for a moment watching the beautiful blonde clean up his mess and smiled softly to himself. "I'm so sorry about that. I didn't mean to…"

"What for, interrupting our embarrassing argument, or spilling water on my ungrateful, gold digging mother?" Marissa stood back up and handed him the dustpan. "Trust me both I am grateful for."

Marcello took them from her and smiled. He liked this girl that was for sure. "Why is it that we never have chatted it up before now?"

Marissa just shrugged and moved to sit back down at the vacant table. "Don't ask me, I never knew that fabulously gay boys could be so quiet." She crossed her legs and smiled towards him.

"Oh trust me honey, I'm anything BUT quiet, and I'm even nosier to boot." He stood there, completely interested in this girl now, and wanting to know even more than before. "Speaking of being nosey, what was that about before? Your mom seemed pretty paranoid." He sat down where Julie once sat and continued his conversation.

Marissa shrugged her shoulders. It was a common argument between her and her mother really, so much so that she didn't even really know what it was about. "The mystery of Julie Cooper and the way she thinks is beyond me. She always gets that way when I try to talk about my friends from back home."

And now that Marcello seemed to be breaking ground, he gained courage and decided to ask more. "Why don't you ever talk to them?" That was the part of the conversation that he definitely heard clearly enough.

"To be honest, I am not really sure. I guess now it's just been too long to go back. I mean things are different now, and god knows that I'm different. I guess maybe this is how it really was meant to be" It sounded like a rehearsed answer, one that Marissa had been practicing to tell someone for quite awhile… perhaps three years. And then she thought about it a bit more. It had been three years since the accident, and even if she was at odds with Summer, she couldn't help but think that they had been friends for far too long to just completely forget about each other. And as for the others, she was somewhat embarrassed. She was told that talking to them would only cause her more confusion. Could she really face them knowing that she barely remembered them?

"I think about them all the time, I guess I just…" She continued on with her thoughts and Marcello chimed in.

"Well get over it already. You can't completely forget about where you came from, I'm sure everyone back home really misses you. And from the looks of it you miss them too."

Marissa looked up into Marcello's unique eyes and smiled softly. Did they miss her? OR had they long forgotten about her? She wished she had that option to at least remember.

"It's more complicated than that." She admitted, not thinking that Marcello had any clue to her amnesia.

"Why don't you tell me more about it then? Help me to understand." He asked. But as soon as Marissa looked as if she were really about to open up, someone was clearing their throat behind them. Marcello jumped up out of his seat and turned to come face to face with Julie.

"Marissa." She spoke her name, but stared at Marcello, giving him the 'don't mess with me look. "Are you ready to go? The shops await us."

Marissa rolled her eyes and reluctantly stood up. She didn't want to spend any more time with her mother, especially like this, but maybe she could use this trip to guilt her into buying those new shoes she wanted.

"Alright mom, let's go." With that Marissa walked by a stunned Marcello. For a brief moment she placed her hand on his shoulder and smiled to him. Whispering in his ear she said, "We should hang out sometime." And with that she walked past him and off with her mother.

Marcello frowned slightly. He was so close to getting more information about the situation and failed. He at least confirmed the fact that not all her memory was lost, but they pretty much knew that anyway. Summer would have been so ecstatic to find out more. But now Marissa was more to him than just a mystery to be solved. He felt sorry for Marissa, and he couldn't wait to help her. He and Summer might have their work cut out for them, but he was up for the challenge.

She stood there only a few feet away from the target. She could feel her hands moisten with sweat, as her gaze fell once again object at hand. Her eyes burned into the minute entity hoping that maybe while she was gone it would just disappear. Her plan had worked to leave the room for a few hours; distracting herself temporarily from the object she now had in her possession. But that didn't change the fact that she still had a huge decision to make once she returned. And sure enough the moment she walked into the room, it was as if there were a hundred little devils taunting her, poking her with their forks and telling her in sinister whispers that she had to make a choice. The hardest part was, they weren't even forcing her to go one way or another, just to make a choice was hard enough. She groaned to herself and finally let go of her reservations. Like bottled up water being released from a damn she spout over to it and jumped on the bed. Taking it in her hands she opened it up and her eyes began to read the scribbles over the pages.

Everything was exceedingly familiar. There were just some things that really never change. The constant motion of the Pacific Ocean, the way a four year old child never gets sick of asking 'why', knowing that Sandy would always crack his self righteous jokes at the most inappropriate times, and at the top of the list was the way the pool house smelled, looked and made Ryan feel. Everything was still perfectly in place and identical to what it was when he was in high school. Even the smell was the same. And there he was once more, back at that same place. Not just physically but emotionally as well. He had thought that he had gotten past all the old feelings the pool house brought back to him every time he stepped into it. The once amazing memories were now tainted with pain. After Marissa had left, the pool house just wasn't the same and he had found it most difficult to enjoy being in the place he once found so much security in. However, the past year with Isabella by his side, he had successfully been able to at least sleep there when he came home on Holiday and NOT freak out. It was slowly getting better, until he was ripped back into his old thoughts. Due to his recent yearbook browsing and dreams, his anguish and insecurities came back ten fold.

And yet he was trying desperately to ignore it and get past the struggles. He had grown a lot in the past year, and he wasn't about to fall back to the same place he once was without a fight. It wasn't fair to himself, nor was it fair to Isabella. He paused from the sketches he was doing and looked up to his girlfriend laying on his bed. She was laying on her side. Wearing a semi paisley form fitting top, to show off her full breasts and simple low rise jeans, his eyes went from the curls of her gorgeous brown hair, to the curves of her body. He knew that he had something great with her. She was one of the most passionate people he had ever known. She was intelligent, and outgoing, and she forced him to come out of his shell. And he knew that some day she would make an amazing counselor. She was always there to listen to him, and she gave the best advice ever, almost as good as Sandy's. He just wished that he could open up to her more. But he always had a hard time with words, and she was the extreme opposite; incredibly articulate, and never afraid to say what she was feeling. He admired that in her, and wished that sometimes he could be as open. And the way she kissed… so gentle, and with so much behind each one. There was only one other girl in his life that he felt something more with. He smiled at his thoughts, and continued to stare along her features both on her face and on her body. They really had come along way, and he was thankful for that.

As Ryan stared, Izzy could feel eyes upon her and looked up. Ryan was sitting on the floor with his back leaning up against a few oversized stacked pillows. Because the bed was low to the ground he was able to look into Izzy's green eyes easily. He smiled and she closed the book she was reading.

"What?" She asked him, wondering why he was looking at her so strangely.

"Nothing, I was just watching you." He set his sketches aside and continued to look at her.

"Well I see that weirdo, but aren't you supposed to be finishing up your work? Seth is going to be pretty suspicious and angry if you ditch him yet again to say that you have too much work to do." She smiled and tucked a piece of her thick curly hair behind her ears.

"Well what if I tell him, I couldn't hang out because I had something else to do?" He wiggled his eyebrows a bit, and couldn't help but smirk.

Isabella saw the look in his eyes and laughed lightly. "Oh what, so now I'm a thing?"

Ryan shrugged and without a word and crawled over to the bed. Izzy naturally fell onto her back to welcome him and Ryan climbed on top of her. He could do this, he wanted to do this, he told himself. He wanted to open up to her, and give her what she deserved. He loved his girlfriend, and needed to prove to himself that he had moved on. He stared down at her with intense cobalt eyes and let the back of his hand run lightly down the side of her face.

Izzy could feel her stomach do flip flops at his touch and returned his smile softly. "Are we doing this?" She asked in a soft whisper, dying for him to answer in the affirmative. She had been craving inside for him to open up to her, but he just wouldn't. And there was something more. They had been dating for quite some time, and although they never lacked with fire between the sheets, whenever they were in Newport Ryan was different. He held back in not only his true emotions but in everything else, even his kisses. And although she wasn't sure if Ryan understood what she meant by 'doing this,' she wanted him so badly... but not just physically, she wanted his heart. And for some reason, she knew that if they could make love here, it would be a stride in the right direction. There was something about Newport, something about this place, and she wanted to know what it was.

Again Ryan didn't speak to her nor did he even bother to nod or shrug. Instead he answered her by lowering his body down so that it pressed against hers softly. His lips met hers in an extremely zealous kiss. His tongue wasted no time separating her lips and entering into her own mouth. It was unlike Ryan. Even when he was most antsy, he still went slow, and enjoyed all their time together. But it was as if he took his time he might actually turn back. Even with this gorgeous woman in front of him, one he loved very much, this was going to be hard…. Even if he wanted it.

Izzy returned his kisses with just as much passion. But she wasn't sure she liked him so aggressive. Not that they hadn't had pretty wild sex before, but they were just sharing an intimate moment, one she wanted to last longer. And so with great struggle she pushed him back lightly and smiled to him. Letting him know she wanted to continue, but wanted to change the pace, she just stared, tracing her hands down his chest softly and to the bottom of his shirt. As soon as she gripped the hem, she pulled it over his head slowly and leaned up again to take his lips once more. This time she started the kiss off slow, but with more passion than she thought she could ever have. Her hands ran over his broad shoulders slowly, wanting to feel every inch of his skin. Their legs entwined together, and Ryan fit comfortably straddling just one. She lifted her outside leg to run her knee along his side and Ryan began to moan into the kiss.

If Isabella was trying to get him to forget his worries, Ryan was pretty sure it had worked. As soon as she took the initiative to take off his shirt, he remembered how much he loved to kiss this girl, to hold this girl, to make love to this girl. He looked down to her and smiled wide. And as soon as their lips met again his eyes closed. As they continued to make out, one of his hands found her neck, and he cupped it with the inside of his hand to hold her face close to his. He didn't want to stop now, this felt amazing and he began to forget where he was altogether. His other hand moved down her collar bone, and with a little bit of pressure he ran it further along the outside of her shirt and over her breast.

Izzy was in heaven, but then again she was every time they were together. She could feel her heart start to beat faster, and her breathing grew very heavy and deep. The kissing grew even more intense. Their noses pressed together and their lips danced with one another. Ryan then pulled back once more and smiled. Izzy took a moment to catch her breath. Then Ryan leaned down and kissed the side of her lips, to her chin and began to go towards her neck. At the same time his hand moved down further to her side and began to creep up her shirt. As his lips met her neck, he lightly blew on her bare skin and then barely touched his lips to her neck, using a different technique than normal.

Isabella giggled lightly and pushed him back. "Ticklish."

Ryan pulled back and smiled. "Sorry." But before anything else could happen Isabella pulled him down again to kiss him once more.

And like that, Ryan was taken back to six years ago...

_It was a perfectly clear Newport night. But the young couple wouldn't even know. They were in the pool house. Marissa was lying on the bed breathing slowly and heavily as she looked up into Ryan's eyes. Ryan moved down, lightly pressing his body to hers and began to kiss her. Marissa's hand was upon Ryan's neck and it seemed Ryan couldn't get enough of the taste of her lips. Then he moved to her right side, sinking into her neck and kissing that just as passionately._

_"Ticklish." Marissa whispered slightly with a smile._

_Ryan stops reluctantly and smiles once more. "Sorry" And then he returns to her lips. As they continue, Ryan uses his right hand to move up Marissa's blue t-shirt, rubbing smoothly and firmly up her side. _

_Marissa stops him and pulls speaks. "Hey, what time do you have?"_

_Ryan couldn't stop. He needed more of her, and so he didn't bother to stop kissing her as he spoke. In between kisses he mumbles. "Mmmm, almost eleven. What time do you have to be back at your dads?"_

_Marissa smiles and speaks again. "Soon."_

_More mumbling, "How soon?"_

_Marissa laughs once more and answers. "Now."_

Ryan pulled back his eyes wide. But instead of seeing Marissa below him it was Isabella. He blinked a few times, and snapped back into reality. He couldn't believe what had just happened. He was dumbfounded and had to pull away.

"Ryan? What's wrong?" Isabella sat up. She had thought that things were going well. At least on her end, and his abrupt stop caught her off guard.

Ryan didn't know what to do. His breathing was heavy and he realized that he was just dreaming... day dreaming, something. He just wasn't in the same place she was, and instant guilt filled his soul. He looked to Izzy and ran a hand through his blonde hair. "I'm sorry, I... I just had to catch my breath." He lied, why was he lying?

Isabella knew that something else was wrong, and it bothered her that he just wouldn't tell her. She frowned and looked over to him. "'Well did you want to stop. I mean, I was having a great time, but if something is on your mind I don't care if we..."

"No, of course not." Ryan interrupted her. This was hard, he didn't want to do this to Isabella. He moved back over to her and laid down on his side. She followed suite laying on her side as well and looking into his eyes.

"Ok, it's just... I don't know, you seem off." She looked even more concerned. When she looked into his eyes they seemed hazy and lost, and it scared her. She had seen this look before, but it had been a long time. "Ryan..." She let her hand reach up to touch the side of his face. "I love you."

Ryan smiled at her words. He loved her too, but for some reason he just couldn't say it. He leaned back in again and kissed her softly.

"You aren't very talkative tonight?" Isabella pointed out, but smiled underneath his kiss.

"I'm never talkative." He responded and kissed her again. "But I am good with my lips in other ways."

Izzy smiled but welcomed his change of mood almost immediately. It was driving her crazy, but she loved him, and in a way accepted it.

Ryan moved closer to her. Though still on their sides, he moved with ease to assault her body with sweet sweet kisses again and again, pausing only for a moment to speak. "I do have to prove to you just how 'on' I can be."

Izzy laughed and pushed him onto his back. Moving on top of him, she placed either leg around his waist to straddle him. She leaned back down and her hair fell in front of her face. Ryan pushed her hair back away so that he was free to kiss her again. "Oh, so that is all I have to do now to get you to kiss me like that, is challenge you?" She shook her head, and he moved to kiss her chest lightly. "Typical male."

Ryan groaned lightly, and to show his typical manliness he sat up, picking Izzy up with him with ease, and flipped her onto her back so that he could hover back over her. "But don't you love that about me?"

Isabella felt his strong arms on her sides, and when he lifted her up, it only turned her on more. She laughed lightly, but when he asked his question she shook her head denying his acquisition.

"Hell no!" She laughed and so did Ryan.

After they got done laughing, Ryan looked down to her. How could he have flashbacks of Marissa while kissing Isabella? It wasn't like they were anything alike. And he was different now too. He stared into her green eyes and leaned down, but didn't kiss her yet.

"Ryan if you want, we can just watch some TV or go back to doing our work." Isabella was now becoming paranoid. She could see the thoughts turning in his head, and she just wanted to make him feel comfortable.

"Do I look like I want to watch TV?" He pressed his lower body into hers so that she could feel how hard he had gotten in their first make out session.

She moaned slightly and closed her eyes. It was all he had to say. This time it was she who attacked his lips. Her hands wrapped around to his bare back, and she lightly dug her finger nails into his skin. She had never remembered wanting him more. Ryan's hands began to explore as well; down her sides, and to the top of her jeans. He let his thumbs read down between the fabric and her skin, and he began to start to tug against them. He then lifted the lower half of his body so that he could reach between them and begin to unbutton her jeans. Without even bothering to pull them down he slipped his hand into the front of them and pressed the palm of it on the outside of her panties.

Isabella moaned, and arched her back pushing her hips forward to meet him. Her hands went further down his back and ran firmly over his butt. She pulled him towards her so that he was forced to press his entire body onto his hand and into her more.

Their kisses became more and more frantic; they needed each other and they needed each other now. _This was it,_ Isabella thought, _this was their moment_. Ryan pulled back with a very satisfied smile upon his face. He was incredibly turned on, and couldn't wait to go further. "Am I on now?" He had to just ask.

Isabella, who was having trouble speaking because she was breathing so heavy looked up to him and smiled. "Well almost."

His eyes grew wide and shook his head. He mocked being frustrated, as if he wasn't enough. "What do you want from me?"

Suddenly Isabella's face grew serious. Ryan's fingers had made their way inside her underwear and had already begun to please her. His other hand had successfully pushed up her shirt and was lightly rubbing her stomach. All Isabella managed to say was, "I want you." With that she closed her eyes and Ryan's lips crashed back into hers.

When Ryan's eyes closed, he was brought back in time once more. This time about three years ago….

_Marissa and Ryan had just recently entered the pool house. He remembered the night just like it was yesterday. Their relationship had been on the rocks, but he had never stopped loving her. He was frustrated and just wanted things to be the way they once were. Marissa looked to him as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed. She joined him by sitting on the stool next to it. _

"_Look, I know it's going to take more than Thai food and teen movies to sort this out but… if you want to talk…" She left the end of the sentence open, wondering what Ryan really did want. She was afraid of what he was going to say._

_Ryan looked to Marissa and then removed his gaze from her. "Talking is the last thing I feel like doing."_

_Marissa sighed softly to herself. "I figured since you gave me silent treatment the whole way in the car."_

_Ryan, not hiding his frustration replied, "What do you want from me?" He looked back towards Marissa, sadness in his eyes. _

_Marissa's heart felt like it had stopped. Didn't he know? She looked to him, away, and then back to him once more. "I want you." The look upon her face was innocent and vulnerable. She moved to touch his arm and look him directly into his eyes. She then leaned forward, touched the side of his neck lightly and leaned in to kiss him. She was hesitant at first, afraid that he might reject her. Her hands floated for a moment on either side of his face, almost as if she was afraid to touch him. But she knew she had to do this. _

_Ryan hesitated at first. He wanted to resist but he knew deep down that he couldn't. He loved her far too much and no matter what they were going through, he knew she was the one. After trying to resist for only a few seconds, Ryan finally brought his one hand up behind her head, cupping it and holder her lips to his. And that was when the kiss intensified. It was full of so many things, the release of tension, amazing desire, but most of all love._

_They never stopped loving each other. It didn't take long for the make out session to move to the next level. As soon as they both let go of their reservations and remembered how to just be them, Marissa found herself lowering herself gracefully onto Ryan's bed. Marissa reached up to lightly wrap her arms around Ryan's head to pull him on top of her. As soon as he was there, she released her head, and her hands fond their way to his face again, as if it was something to be treasured. _

_Their lips continued to dance perfectly with one another. They were made to be together, they both knew that. Ryan ran his hand through her soft golden hair, and things begin to heat up some more. Suddenly they realized that they had too many clothes on. Ryan began to help Marissa take her jacket off, first one arm and then switching to the other side. But as he began to slip the second one off they were interrupted with the all too familiar ring of Marissa's cell phone._

Ryan snapped out of it once more, when he realized that it was Isabella's shirt he was removing and not Marissa's jacket. He blinked a few times, wondering what was going on in his head. Luckily this time, they were so into it, that Isabella didn't notice his hesitation. Ryan felt like he was going crazy. His ghosts would not stop haunting him. He shut his eyes tightly, trying to block it out of his head. He continued to kiss Izzy, and try to make her feel good. But inside his head was swirling and he was getting dizzy.

He tried again, to block it out, but this time the images grew more vivid in his brain. And this time they as they came back they weren't as pleasant. Ryan in reality was on his back, and Isabella was rubbing he hands down his chest, and moving them over his stomach and to the top of his jeans. But his eyes were closed and in his mind he was staring at a shattered Marissa. Her face was gaunt and it was hard for her to keep her eyes open. Her normally beautifully flush lips were almost as pale as her face. And as she turned her head, Ryan could see the large gash on the right side of her face. Her gorgeous hair was soaked with sticky deep red blood.

As Isabella moved down to kiss him once more, he imagined it was the tortured Marissa coming towards him. He could feel his eyes start to well up and suddenly he jumped.

"Isabella stop!" He lifted her up off of him and stood up so quickly, Izzy had no idea what had happened.

She lay there half naked and feeling completely exposed. She started to shake as she saw Ryan began to pace around the room, acting like he was claustrophobic and needed to get out. He was sweaty and red; Isabella had never seen him like that before. And because it came from no where, she couldn't help but at first think that it was something she had done.

"Ryan…" she started off timidly, her voice was shaky. She grabbed for her shirt and put it back on.

But Ryan didn't turn around, he kept his back to her, fighting off the tears of frustration. He clenched his fits. He suddenly wanted to hit something. He tried taking a deep breath, successfully keeping the tears in, but in the mean time his stomach began to feel queasy.

Isabella buttoned her pants and moved to get up off the bed. For a moment she just stood there, too terrified to approach him. But she was more scared not to. "Ryan." She tried again. She reached out to touch his shoulder. "Ryan are you ok?"

With her touch, Ryan jumped, and immediately regretted his reaction. What was he doing? He had thought that he could do this, but maybe he was just fooling himself. A tear escaped Izzy's eye as he jumped. She took her hand back and hugged her arms around her own curvy body.

Ryan turned around to face her. And the look upon her smooth face broke his heart. "I'm so sorry Isabella." He remained further away from her, but stayed facing her.

Isabella didn't know what to say, or how to react. One moment they were about to make love, and she had never been so turned on in her life, and the next he wouldn't even let her touch him. Her full pink lips trembled and she looked up to him once more. "Ryan, please tell me what is wrong. Please, you are scaring me." She pleaded with him; she couldn't take it anymore.

"It's not you, Isabella." He reassured her instantly. He didn't want to her to think for a second that she had done anything wrong. But when she looked at him to ask him what it really was, he wasn't sure how to say it. "It's this place." He began to look around. He closed his eyes for a moment to try to fight the demons coming back. "They remind me too much of her." He hadn't even realized it, but Ryan had just admitted something big.

Isabella's heart sank. She felt like suddenly she couldn't breath and she had to back up to sit on the edge of the bed. All of her fears were coming true. He was thinking of Marissa… wait, he was thinking of her while they were sharing this moment? She ran her hand over her face and looked down to the ground. "Of Marissa." She spoke so softly and her voice was unrecognizable.

Ryan looked to her confused. Did she just say her name? Yes, he had mentioned Marissa before, but he had always left out the details, so how could she possibly know who it was that he was referring to. "I… " It was the only letter he could get out, before he closed his mouth again.

Isabella regained her courage and looked back up to him. She didn't know that this much pain even existed. She was the reason why they hadn't moved forward in their relationship. SHE was the thing Ryan couldn't let go of. And thanks to Kirsten, she now knew why. Should she tell him what she knew? The selfish side of her wanted to keep it a secret. If he knew where Summer was, and what she knew, would he go too? But Isabella also knew that if she kept it to herself it still might not do any good. Whether or not, he had hope of her return or not, she would still continue to affect their relationship.

"Ryan, talk to me." She pressed him once more. She didn't want to have to tell him, she just wanted him to admit it all, to trust her and to confide in her. To tell her what he went through after the accident.

Ryan blinked and looked down to the ground. He knew that if he ever wanted to move forward with Izzy, he just had to be honest with her. And maybe if he talked about his past with her, the demons would be released. The thing was, he wasn't completely sure he was ready to let go of them yet. He didn't speak verbally, he just looked back up to her and spoke to her with his eyes.

Isabella looked at him and knew that he wasn't going to talk to her. He never did when it came to something real. She sighed softly and let out a long breath. No more thinking, she knew what she had to do. She couldn't be afraid of the outcome of telling him what she knew, because right now, things couldn't get worse than this.

"Ryan I know." She stated simply.

His eyes shot up to her. What did she mean she 'knew'? What exactly did she know? He squinted his eyes lightly, waiting for her to further explain.

Isabella may have not known every single detail, but with the information she had received, along with knowing Ryan pretty well, and just being an intelligent girl, she put two and two together.

"I know what happened to Marissa."

"Oh my Holy Prada shoes, you talked to her about me?" The look on Summer's face was priceless. Marcello was in the middle of telling her about his interaction with Marissa and Julie. As soon as he had left the restaurant, he couldn't wait to run to the hotel and tell Summer all about it, even if he hadn't gotten as much information as he had wanted. He was a drama queen, and lived for this stuff, especially when he was the messenger. Besides, any attention he could get from his new best friend, he would lavish in.

Summer wasn't in complete shock. Her suspicions had merely been confirmed. Marissa's memory wasn't completely lost. If it was, how would she even remember her at all? But now that some of the simpler questions had been answered, they opened up so many more: why she hadn't come home, or at least tried to contact her? How had Julie lied to everyone about Marissa's true condition? Was it Marissa's choice or Julie's? And how much did Marissa actually know?

Marcello wrinkled his nose a bit at her reaction and laughed. "What are you batgirl meets designer princess or something?"

"No, Little Miss Vixen." She corrected him quickly but blew off his joke because she wanted to know more.

Again he looked at her confused and shook his head. He didn't want to know, and continued on. "You should have seen the look on Julie's face when the water spilled all over her lap!"

Summer just shook her head, she definitely wished she had been there to see that. Then again, if she had, then Marcello wouldn't have been able to talk to Marissa. So as much as any Julie embarrassment would have made her entire year, this was more important.

"When you heard my name, what was she like? Did she look like she missed me?" Summer begged to know more. "I mean, if she remembers me, why hasn't she contacted me?"

Marcello who was sitting with his legs folded and crossed in front of him, was across from Summer on the large king sized bed. He wasn't sure what to say. He had a hard time understanding it all himself. He only wished he could have asked more questions.

He took a deep breath and began to speak. "To be honest, I think that she seemed confused. I know you are right about her remembering you Bella, but there is still something missing. She seemed scared, and when I asked her why she hadn't tried to contact her friends from home she clammed up."

"That's my Marissa." Summer nodded. "She really was never one to just show her emotions out right. She would rather hide behind things like her vodka than face her tribulations." She paused for a moment to ponder. "She is just like Hope on the Valley. I swear sometimes I think that character was based directly off of her."

Marcello nodded. With the comparison of his favorite character from his favorite American show, he understood Marissa so much more. "Oh my gosh, could you believe her in the middle of last season? She was driving me completely mad. If it wasn't for her turn around at Prom and Graduation I was going to lose faith in her altogether."

Summer nodded in agreement, falling into the trap to gossip about the best show known to man. "Oh I know, and the way she treated Nicole, when she was only trying to be her friend and save her from that walking STD… I wanted to strangle her!"

They both grew silent with smiles upon their face as the reminisced about the latest season of the Valley. Then they both remembered what they were discussing, and without missing a beat, both returned to the topic at hand.

"She said something like it has been too long now to go back to her old life. But I think that was a weak excuse, I know there is something more." Summer pondered some more as Marcello continued. "She was going to tell me about it when her vile mother interrupted us."

Summer rolled her eyes at the thought of Julie ruining their plans once again. But that didn't discourage her, Marcello's information gave her the boost she needed to vibrate at a high frequency once again, and she was ready for round two. "Do you know where they are right now?"

"Of course, they were headed down town to the Cinecitta Due Centro Commerciale!" He smiled at the thought one of the biggest shopping centers in Rome. "What I wouldn't give to shop with those girls. As determined as Julie is, and fashionable and Marissa is, I would be sure to get the best of the best in no time at all."

Summer stood up and offered her hand to help him. "Well you may just get your wish."

Marcello accepted her hand and pulled himself up to stand next to her. "What? Where are you going?"

"WE… are going to go follow them." Summer explained.

Marcello's eyes widened. "We are?"

"Of course we are, your initial interaction with her only makes me want to know more. And we aren't going to know more by just sitting around." She got up from the bed and moved over to her suitcase. "I know I have me pink oversized Dolce & Gabbana sunglasses here somewhere." She began rummaging through her suitcase and continued talking. "Do you have a hat or sunglasses for yourself?"

"Please do you honestly think I'm going to ruin this fabulous hair by putting on a hat? I'm having a great hair day." But before Marcello could say anything else, Summer had found a hat in her suitcase and went over and stood on her tip toes to put it on his head. "Hey!"

"If we are going to be following them around, and really want to find more out, then they can't recognize us." Summer stared, and put her hair back in a pony tail. Marcello opened his mouth to speak. "Don't argue with me."

Marcello sighed. He knew there was no use trying to debate. And truth was, he was more than up for the mission. But, he just had to complain anyway. They both started to disguise themselves the best they could, wearing jeans, oversized sweatshirts and of course hats and sunglasses.

"You know how much this kills me. I haven't worn clothes this big since I was trying to pretend I was straight in the fifth grade. Even then I wasn't very convincing." He adjusted his sunglasses and looked to Summer.

She had her pink over sized D&G sunglasses, with a hoody that she would use later with the hood up once they got near the Cooper girls. Marcello looked surprisingly butch in his 'baggy' sweatshirt, hat, and sunglasses. They stared at each other and then both looked in the mirror both satisfied with how they looked.

Summer nodded to him and smiled. "You pull of heterosexuality quite well."

"Eww don't even say that out loud again." He adjusted his hat once more and smiled. "Besides I wouldn't want to get your hopes up and break your heart."

Summer rolled her eyes and moved towards the door. "You wish." She looked around the room and then remembered she forgot her purse. She moved over to the bed and picked it up. Underneath it was the journal she and Marcello took from Marissa's room. She turned and headed for the door again.

Marcello noticed it. "So did you do it?" Marcello asked as the moved through the door and towards the lifts.

"Do what?" Summer decided to play dumb, and of course she knew how to do it well, even if it had been awhile.

He paused and put his hand on his hips. Even through all his 'straight gear' he still looked extremely gay. "Cute." He stated simply. "You know exactly what I am talking about."

And yet Summer just looked to him and shrugged.

"Please do not tell me you didn't even take a peek? Summer, you want to know more, and that is the perfect opportunity to do so!" The lift opened and they both walked inside. He couldn't believe that Summer still hadn't read the journal.

"I just feel like its invading someone's privacy. It was taunting me all day. I almost did it once, but then I realized I'd rather just find things out the right way." She stated simply. But Marcello really had no idea how hard it was for her to not look inside.

"By the right way, you mean following them around shopping, while looking like idiots? You Americans sure do things backwards." He sighed and just as the bell dinged to indicate they had reached the bottom floor, Summer swatted him across the shoulder.

"I do things my own way. And I am not about to be one of those friends who snoops. It may be hard enough to get Marissa to open up to me as it is. So I'm not about to give her a reason not to trust me." Summer explained herself as they moved to the Vespas Marcello had borrowed for them again.

And then it hit him, he had forgotten to tell Summer the most important part. "That reminds me." He put on his helmet over his hat, making him look even more goofy. "Right before I interrupted Julie and Marissa talking today, there was something odd that Julie said, that just didn't sit right with me."

"Julie always says something odd, but go on." She put her helmet on and strapped it under her chin.

"She said, 'don't forget what she did to you.' And I can't possibly understand what she meant by it." He started up his Vespa and looked to her for her reaction.

"What –_I-_ did to her? What in the world did I do to her?" Summer tried to think what she could have possibly done. She was very confused and tried hard to think of the options. And then suddenly it hit her. "THAT BITCH!"

There was no humorous name calling, no five word description, just flat out 'bitch,' and Marcello was taken back. "What's wrong?"

Summer started her Vespa, with a very determined look upon her face. "Do I have to explain everything?" She shook her head. "I never did anything wrong, she must have made something up so Marissa wouldn't try to contact me!" She was fuming so much; she couldn't believe how conniving Julie really was. "I wish I knew what it was, so I was prepared to defend myself."

"I bet it's in the journal." Marcello pointed out.

She glared at him and shook her head. "It's not happening." And with that she pressed on the gas and they were off down the road.

About fifteen minutes later, the dynamic duo had already parked their scooters and were walking around the shopping center where Marcello said Marissa and Julie went to all of the time. As promised, Summer's hood was up, and her sunglasses were on. And of course Marcello was still wearing his hat no matter how much he complained to Summer, he wasn't going to win that argument. They were currently ducking in and out of stores, trying to find where the Cooper girls were.

Summer was directing Marcello into all of the shops she was sure Marissa and Julie would be in. Even if Marissa lost some of her memory, she was sure she would still have the same fashion sense. But they still couldn't seem to find them.

Just when they were going to have to brainstorm where else they might be, Marcello spotted the twiggy blonde and her fiery mother. They had just walked into a Fendi store, both hauling a few bags in each hand from other various shops. Marcello perked up and pointed. "There they are!" He smiled getting excited at his discovery.

Summer instantly turned around to see, and as soon as it was confirmed with her own eyes she pulled the hood further over her face and ducked behind a near by potted tree. She was silent for a few moments just observing the two women she once knew so well. Suddenly she got a little queasy in the stomach. Could she really do this?

She continued to stare, like a true trust fund girl watching her credit cards being cut up, and Marcello, who had followed in tow behind her, was peering over her shoulder. "Are you ok?" He asked, wondering what she was feeling seeing Marissa with her mother.

"What?" She asked, being drawn out of her state of trance. "Oh yeah, lets go see if we can hear them talking." She grabbed Marcello by the hand and they made their way into the store. The shop was somewhat small, and they didn't have a ton of options to hide out. Julie was off talking to one of the clerks and Marissa was checking out a few of the bags that were at a discounted price.

Marissa and Marcello stooped down the other little aisle which was towards Marissa's back. Marcello tapped Summer on the shoulder as he saw Julie walking back towards Marissa. As she walked by them, Summer grabbed an oversized bag and put it in front of her face. And in the most weak Italian accent ever she spoke, "Look at the detail on this one, Antonio. Isn't it exquisite?"

Marcello stifled a laugh but when Summer elbowed him in the ribs he coughed and spoke. "It's wonderful darling." And with that they both peeked there heads slowly around the bag to see Julie walk over to Marissa.

"Marissa honey, why are you in the clearance section, it isn't like we can't afford the others." Julie spoke out loud. She was trying desperately to mend what had happened earlier in the day. After she left the restaurant with Marissa they had quite the argument.

Marissa looked up as her mother approached. "First of all, it isn't our money it's Joseppi's, and I happen to like this bag." She held up a beige and red large hobo bag with Leather trim.

Julie studied the bag and smiled. "You always did have the best eye for fashion Marissa, you must get it from me." She smiled and nodded in approval.

Summer gasped and Marcello looked at her immediately. Julie had heard the gasp and turned to look their way, and immediately Marcello pulled her down so that they were in a crouched position below a shelf.

"Are you TRYING to give us away!" He yelled in a loud whisper.

"I'm sorry, it's just I just got that bag shipped to me at the end of last semester! It was my favorite purchase that month." She explained to him why she was so shocked.

Marcello couldn't help but laugh and rolled his eyes. Luckily Julie hadn't seen the pair, and moved her attention back to Marissa.

"So is that the one you want then?" Julie smiled once more, hoping that after their shopping trip she and Marissa would be on good terms again.

But Marissa wasn't stupid, she knew her mom was just trying to buy her approval back from her. And normally she wouldn't let her, but for some reason today she was going to take advantage of it. "Yeah I guess." But she wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of seeing any enthusiasm.

Julie smiled weakly and took the bag from her stubborn daughter. She then turned and moved towards the cashier to pay for the bag on Joseppi's credit card. Marissa stayed back to continue to browse.

Summer and Marcello watched as Julie walked by, and then looked at each other. "I think that you should go talk to her." Marcello suggested. "We aren't going to find anything out by watching them shop. Maybe now is the time."

Summer, still trying to whisper stood up a bit to watch Marissa move to the wallet section. She stared again for a few minutes. She had been waiting for this day for so long, and now that it was finally here she didn't know how to execute it. She wasn't normally one that hesitated or doubted her actions. But this was a delicate situation. She turned to Marcello quite nervous. "What if…"

"What if nothing, she is your best friend, and no matter what she thinks happened between you, she is going to be happy to see you." He tried to encourage her, and pushed her a little towards the back where the wallets were displayed.

But Summer hesitated more and pushed back on him. "But maybe it's too soon, maybe I should go back and read the journal, to know what I'm up against." She began to make excuses. This was so unlike Summer, when was she ever afraid of confrontation?

Marcello just shook his head, a little disappointed in his friend, and trying to persuade her to do what he thought was best. "Summer you already told me that reading the journal was a bad idea, so don't give me that nonsense. Just go out and do it!"

They were in a heated whisper, and their hands started to fly around as they talked silently. They were both so into trying to convince the other of what to do, that they hadn't seen Julie turn their way and down their aisle.

Julie's head was down, and she was busy looking at the purchases she had just made, and just as she looked up she was practically on top of the back of Summer. "Oh excuse me." She actually sounded quite genuine.

Summer who was too busy defending her actions didn't even realize it was Julie's voice. She turned to step out of the way and her hood fell down to her shoulders. As soon as her shaded eyes met Julie's she gasped again. She felt like her stomach had not only churned but jumped out of her throat. Marcello who was facing Julie to begin with stood there with wide eyes.

Julie couldn't believe her eyes either. She blinked a few times and then gritted her teeth together. "You." She spoke one word, and didn't know what else to day. Then she tried to smile, unaware that her faux happiness to see her daughter's beset friend was the worst acting either of them had ever seen. "What are you doing here?"

Although Summer was timid before, seeing Julie made all of her reservations vanish instantly. "Well you see, I've lost my mind, and I heard Rome was the best place for doctors, and I thought I would check it out." She could feel the temperature in the room going up, and things around her going black.

Julie laughed uncomfortably, and honestly wasn't sure what to say. Should she continue with her lies? Part of her almost wanted to cry, she had to think of something fast. However, before she could think of any sort of response Marcello chimed in. "I think you might want to say something, before you experience the worst rage blackout in history."

If Summer could, she would have laughed at her new friend's response. It was cute to hear him say 'rage blackout' in his thick Italian accent. But her eyes and soul were focused on a speechless Julie.

Finally she started to speak. "Summer my dear, if I would have known you were coming, I would have…"

"Who are you talking to mom?" A completely clueless Marissa had seen her mother talking to two people from afar. She had moved over to see what was going on. But what she was about to see would more than astonish her.

Summer was already coming up with something quick and witty in her head to say to Julie, but her thoughts were interrupted when she heard her best friend's voice. She quickly turned around to face her. And even though she could barely contain all the anger she held inside for Julie, she still managed to offer her a smile.

"Summer?" Marissa asked, as if she didn't believe it was really her. She didn't know what to do, was she dreaming again? She stood there, stuck in her spot, trying to take it all in.

Summer removed her sunglasses, revealing a set of big brown, watery eyes. "Hey Coop."


	8. The Revelations

_Chapter eight: The Revelations _

Summer removed her sunglasses, revealing a set of big chocolate brown, watery eyes. "Hey Coop."

Marissa stood there for a moment, completely dumbfounded. First she had thought that this must be a joke; either that or a very strange and vivid dream. Was her mind truly playing nasty tricks on her? Not only was she seeing Summer, but now she was hearing her too. She looked at her big brown eyes, not realizing that Marcello and Julie were staring at the both of them waiting to see what her reaction would be. Maybe she was right all along, she really was going crazy because this couldn't be happening, it didn't make sense.

She closed her greenish blue eyes for a moment and held them shut, trying to take it all in. Julie stared at her daughter, wondering if she was ok. She took a step forward to touch her arm, but before she could even make contact Marissa came to and reopened her eyes. She figured that as soon as she opened them reality would reappear and the vibrant mirage of Summer would be gone. But to her astonishment Summer was still standing there, her smile still wide and welcoming, and her cheeks stained slightly with tears. Everyone was so silent that it was deafening and Marissa's head felt like it was going to explode.

A million thoughts and questions started running through her clouded mind_. What was she doing here? Was she there to see her? Shouldn't I be screaming at her for sleeping with my boyfriend? Did time heal all the wounds? Could she even be angry with something she didn't remember? She looked amazing. I really have missed her. Should I hug her? Should I run away? Why now after all this time? _All of these thoughts were crashing down on her all at once, but the one thing on her mind that held more weight than any other was _what would seeing her mean in her quest to finding her memory_? Suddenly she felt embarrassed. She was confused and scared. The fact that she didn't know how to act with her once best friend was driving her senseless. She took a step away and looked down. Her stomach tightened and she felt a little nauseous.

As she took a step back, Julie finally reached out to place a hand on her shoulder, hoping that the contact would comfort her. She tried to tilt her head a little to meet her yes. "Marissa honey, are you ok?" The look of genuine concern was very evident upon her face. She looked up to Summer instantly and tried to think of something quick. "It might be too much for her." She spoke as if Marissa was a mute and couldn't answer for herself.

Summer looked to Marcello and he shook his head with disbelief. "Too much for her to see her best friend?" He chimed in and took a step forward before Summer could even respond. He was ready to step in and help his new friend with whatever she needed. He knew how Julie could be, and he wasn't about to let her come between these two best friends any longer. It was obvious to him the love Summer had for Marissa, and the idea of Julie keeping them apart infuriated him.

Marissa heard Marcello's words covered in his thick Italian accent and was a bit taken back by the passion in his voice. How did he know anything about them? _This was all too much. _She looked up to him, and with his glance he gave her a small reassuring smile. Something about it made Marissa ease up just a bit. But before she could speak Julie interrupted her.

"Do you have any idea what my daughter has gone through?" She paused and shot a piercing glare in Marcello's direction. "Seeing someone from her past like this could cause her much confusion." With that, she stepped in front of Marissa, as if to protect her from any harm. She wasn't going to let two young kids ruin three long years of getting Marissa to where she was today.

But Summer knew better. And Julie's words only fueled her anger. She could feel her blood start to boil and things around her started to blur. The fire in her eyes was enough to scare anyone and she took a step forward. "Or it could help her regain her memory!" Summer shouted, she pushed her hood back further, and stood up tall.

Marcello looked to his friend proudly and knew that this wasn't over by any means; in fact it was just starting. He placed his hands on his hips and nodded to Summer and then both of them turned to face Julie to see her reaction.

Julie was shocked to find Summer to be so bold. She stared at her for a moment with a look to say, "_don't mess with me."_ She stood her ground and raised her chin a bit to let Summer know she was not backing down from this. "Summer…" She began, her voice sweet as can be, but her eyes darting towards her. "… you really don't know what you are talking about." She pressed her lips together firmly, causing thin white lines to spout from them.

Maybe it was the fake sweetness in her voice, or more likely it was nearly three years of life without her best friend, but Summer could feel her heart start to beat faster and she took another step closer. She wasn't going to let Julie Cooper do this, she was determined to speak her mind and get Marissa back in her life. Now the indomitable brunette and the daunting red head stood face to face, with mere inches between them.

"Well maybe I _would_ know what I was talking about if you would have told us where she was, and informed us of her well being!" Summer was trying with all her might not to scream in the middle of the shopping center. She was also attempting to keep her cool, but every second that passed she grew more and more fired up.

Marissa who was standing behind her mother could hear the anger in Summer's voice and grew even more confused. _Why now, after all this time? _She took a step back from them and stared as the two continued to confront each other. Marcello never left Summer's side, and he let his hand run to the small of her back for mental support, all the while diverting his gaze between the three women.

"Listen here young lady, I know what is best for my daughter and you need to change your tone of voice if you…" Julie began to defend herself but Summer interrupted her before she could even finish.

"If I what?!" She began, not even trying to hold back her anger now. She shook her head in disgust. Anything that Julie would try to throw at her, she already knew she would have an argument for. She was prepared for battle. "You kept her from us Julie! For three years! We were the one thing that could have helped her and your selfish, well manicured, cardio-bar ass kept her from us! You say you know what's best for her, but I'm thinking you only know what's best for Julie Cooper." She paused and then looked to Marcello who just smiled to her for being so outspoken.

"Cardio-bar ass?" He questioned with a laugh bending his head down low to check her ass out and shook his head. But Summer was too focused now to even crack a smile. She eyed him carefully and then looked back to Julie.

Julie couldn't believe what she was hearing. When did Summer become so brave and brazen? She had to admit she was a bit taken back by her daughter's best friend's forwardness. She would have never expected her to stand up to her the way that she was. And suddenly she began to become a little frightened by the outcome of this encounter. "I don't need to explain myself to you." Julie began, but when she saw that her strong voice didn't budge Summer she continued. "Look Summer, the doctor's said that…"

Julie tried to remain calm, tried to act like she was in control. She was not about to concede defeat to this young girl. Julie had been playing this game for far too long, and she had many years on her. She didn't have to take this attitude, and she wouldn't. Summer may be determined and bitchy now, but there is no way she could trump Julie Cooper. But Summer was on a roll and she wouldn't let Julie breathe any sort of lie. "They said what, Julie? To keep Marissa from the ones who love her the most? I find that very hard to…"

"You slept with my boyfriend." Marissa interrupted meekly. She had finally come from around Julie and showed her face to them once more. She wasn't sure what they were talking about, but the one thing she wanted answered was why Summer was even acting like her friend. "How could you do that… after Holly and Luke… why?" She paused and continued to look into her yes. "We were best friends." She was confused beyond anything, and her first reaction was to just run. And yet she didn't escape just yet, she wanted to know why someone who clamed to love her would do something so hurtful. None of it was making sense, but she was trying. With her head hung low she didn't wait for a response to move on. "You claim to love me but you slept with my boyfriend. We haven't been close for longer than three years, so what do you want Summer? What are you doing here?"

Although both women wanted to continue the tremendously heated discussion they were in, as soon as they heard Marissa's voice, they grew absolutely silent. They stared, and watched her as she spoke with her head to the floor. After she was done, Marissa raised her head slowly and met Summer eye to eye, waiting to see some sort of flicker of regret or even some form of embarrassment from being called upon the truth. But instead of seeing her cheeks flush red, all Marissa saw was a fresh tear run down Summer's face.

"Marissa I don't know where you…" she stopped herself and shook her head in disbelief. How could she tackle this? Her eyes met Julie and she took a deep breath. Turning back to Marissa she spoke again, "I could never sleep with Ryan… I…"

Marissa looked to her for a moment and squinted her eyes. _Ryan? Did she just say Ryan?_ She turned her gaze to her mother for a moment, a strange look forming upon her normally very confident face. She wanted her mother to explain to her what was going on, but everyone was quiet once again. "Not Ryan." She started, "Ryan and I never dated… I.. I was talking about Koby." Marissa saw things flashing before her eyes. The same images she had been thinking about for the last three years. The dreams, the memories of her times right before TJ mixed with memories in which she wasn't sure were real or not. Things started circling around her, and she was losing focus again. She began to freak out, and needed answers now.

"Koby? Who in the hell is Koby?" Summer immediately glanced to Julie for an explanation. But Julie wasn't paying attention to Summer at all. She was looking to Marissa who was starting to turn paler and meek.

She shook her head and moved to support her. "Marissa, honey are you ok?" She turned to Summer and glared at her. "You are confusing her!" She grew more frightened, not just for Marissa but for her entire plan that seemed to becoming unraveled. "Marissa honey, we should go, and I'll explain everything once we..." She couldn't lose her, she couldn't lose her Marissa.

"Don't you think you've done enough!" Summer wanted to hit her, she knew now what Ryan felt like all those times. "Marissa… listen, I know you are confused, that is why I came…."

"Marissa you have to trust Summer…" Marcello chimed in at the same time.

Everyone was talking to her at once, but Marissa found it hard to actually hear anyone's actual words. She hadn't felt this confused since right after the accident. She looked from Summer and then to Julie. Both of their mouths were moving; she could see the concern in their eyes, but Marissa had never felt so claustrophobic in her life. She started to back away from them, shaking her head. "Both of you just stop!" She screamed as tears of her own burned the white flesh on her face. "I… I can't do this." She admitted to them.

Julie and Summer stopped arguing and turned to look at the distraught Marissa. Simultaneously they took a step forward to comfort her. Summer could feel her heart starting to break; this is not how she wanted things to happen. And at the same time, Julie felt like her world was crashing down on her all over again. "Marissa." They both spoke at the same time.

"No, don't." She instructed them, taking another step back and putting her thin white hands up to keep space between herself and them. "Just leave me alone." And before either of them could do anything else Marissa turned around and started to walk away. At first it was just a couple of sluggish steps, but before she knew it she was in a full on dash. It was too much for her to handle, and she wasn't sure she could take it right now. Tears started to stream down her face just as fast as her legs were taking her through the shopping center. She couldn't get out quickly enough. Her head was spinning; it felt like it could explode at any minute. Everything around her was a blur and she could feel herself become dizzy. The amount of information she was trying to process only bemused her more.

But regardless of her head spinning, she continued running… running until she couldn't breathe anymore, and she was forced to stop. As she did, she rounded her shoulders over, placing her hands on her knees to catch her breath, the tears felt like they were burning holes into her soft skin. Looking around, she tried to gain her composure. And as soon as she did, she hailed down a cab and quickly spoke to the driver as she got in. "Lake Bracciano." She told the driver, and without speaking he responded by heading out of the city.

"_Ryan I know." She stated simply. _

_His eyes shot up to her. What did she mean she 'knew'? What exactly did she know? He squinted his eyes lightly, waiting for her to further explain. _

_Isabella may have not known every single detail, but with the information she had received, along with knowing Ryan pretty well, and just being an intelligent girl, she put two and two together._

"_I know what happened to Marissa."_

Ryan stood there for a moment just staring into his girlfriend's deep green eyes. He pressed his lips together firmly, holding his breath, and causing his face to grow slightly more white. What did she mean she knew what happened to Marissa? How could she possible know? He tilted his head slightly, trying to figure out what exactly she was talking about. But again he remained silent.

Isabella looked at him, waiting for some kind of reaction; or even just a form of recognition that he had heard her. But to her dismay she didn't obtain one; instead she received a blank stare with a slight tilt of the head. She sighed, and had everything she could do to not let out the tears that were welling up behind her eyes. Her heart was breaking, because she was finally realizing just how much Marissa meant to Ryan. But it was more than that. He was still in love with her, she was the reason he couldn't love her back. The thing was, she would have been ok with knowing about her. She could handle the fact that he had had past loves; it was rare to find someone who hadn't had them at their age. It was just that if he would have just been honest with her, if he would just admit he was still in love with her…

"The accident, her memory loss, I know it all." Isabella reaffirmed her first statement. Her voice trembled as she attempted to take another step towards him. She wasn't going to tell him how she knew, but she knew, and that was all that mattered. "Ryan?" She called out his name, wondering if she should try to touch him again.

Ryan closed his eyes and turned his back to Isabella. Visions of a broken, bruised and beaten Marissa flashed before his eyes again. He tried to ignore them, but they seemed as clear as day. She knew. How did she know? As much as Seth couldn't keep his mouth shut, he wouldn't think that he would actually make a mistake this huge and tell her. He had warned him time and time again, that Isabella didn't need to know about his past. It was HIS past, his demons, and he didn't want her to have to deal with them.

He ran a hand through his dirty blonde hair and took a deep breath. Some how, deep down inside his gut, he knew this would come up sooner or later. He just didn't expect it so soon. He didn't know what to tell her, because he still hadn't dealt with it himself. And if he was honest with himself, he knew he wasn't willing to admit that even though it had been three years since the accident, he couldn't move on completely. She was still out there… she may have lost her memory, but he hadn't. Finally after a very long silence he spoke in a monotone voice. "Who told you about her?"

Isabella looked at the back of his head, and watched as he ran a shaky hand down the back of it. She sighed and decided to play this game of beating around the bush and hiding from the real issues; at least for now. "Does it really matter how I found out? Most everyone around here knows about the accident, it only took a little bit of investigating to find out more." She paused and waited for him to respond, and with his silence she grew more frustrated. She was trying to at least sound patient, but it was becoming harder by the second. "The question is, why have YOU never told me about her?"

Her question lingered in the air, and this time she wouldn't speak until he answered her. It wasn't something new and surprising that Ryan was keeping something from her. She knew the moment she meant him that he was someone with a complicated past, and it took him awhile to trust and open up to people. But Isabella had felt like they had made progress. He started to open up to her, at least with some things like his family, and his life in Chino. She had truly believed that they were moving past those problems. Little did she know the root of his pain had still been left unturned. It was brutal on her to realize that he still didn't trust her with his heart… and with the important most stuff.

"There isn't anything to tell." He said as he looked over his shoulder at her. But he didn't turn his entire body around. He wished that that would be enough, just telling her he didn't want to talk about it. But he knew her too well now, and he knew she wasn't going to be satisfied with that answer. And so he took a deep breath and continued, trying not to feel… trying to put on the show that it wasn't a big deal. As he spoke, his eyes never met hers. "We dated, and she was in an accident. We weren't even together when it happened." He paused and continued to look straight ahead. "She was in a coma for awhile, but she woke up when I moved to Berkley." Although he was trying hard not to show it, the pain and regret was evident in his voice. "We aren't allowed to see her, not that it matters anyway, because she doesn't remember me." It was the most he had said in a really long time. He only hoped that she would be satisfied with that information.

However, Isabella needed more than that. If Marissa didn't mean anything to him then he wouldn't be acting this way. She took a deep breath and shook her head, disappointed with him, for not trusting her yet again. She had never done anything to hurt him before, and she was tired of proving her loyalty, her passion and her very being to him time and time again in hopes he would return a bit of his heart. Before she knew it, she couldn't hold them back any longer, and the tears started to overflow out of her green eyes and down onto her cheeks. "Julie told everyone to stay away, that it would hurt Marissa more to see you." She picked up where he left off. "And of course, you wanting to do what was best for someone you care about, stayed away… even though it killed you inside." She sat on the edge of her bed, feeling defeated. She wiped the tears away from her cheeks only to have fresh ones take their places. She continued to look up at him, just hoping… praying he would finally open up.

As Isabella began to talk about what she knew, Ryan could feel his blood pressure rise. Why was she talking about this? What right did she have to bring up the past he was trying so hard to forget? The last three years he had fought his very own soul, just to find some sort of peace within himself. But peace was no where to be found. All he created was some sort comfort in consistency. He never stopped hurting, and definitely never stopped missing her, he just got used to it. And in some weird way the constant familiar pain became soothing.

_How I wish I could surrender my soul;_

_Shed the clothes that become my skin_

_See the liar that burns within my needing._

_How I wish I'd chosen the darkness from cold._

_How I wish I'd screamed out loud,_

_Instead I've found no meaning._

_I guess it's time I run, far far away;_

_Find comfort in pain_

_All pleasure's the same:_

_It just keeps me from trouble._

_Hide's my true shape,_

_Like Dorian Gray_

_I've heard what they say,_

_But I'm not here for trouble._

The more he tried to ignore her, the more Isabella continued to speak. Ryan became angrier and angrier and began to shift uncomfortably. He didn't want to do this, not now, not ever. As he felt one single tear drip out of the corner of his eye he clenched his fist and turned around to face her. "Stop." He said with an agitated voice. But it wasn't a scream. He tried to stay calm. He wasn't going to let her bring out his emotions.

_It's more than just words:_

_It's just tears and rain._

Isabella wasn't sure but she thought that she saw a tear streak his face. She looked closely, but just as quickly as it was there it was gone again. And through her own blurry eyes it was hard to focus on anything. "Ryan you need to deal with this." She stood back up, but didn't dare move closer to him. "I know how much she meant to you, I can see it in your eyes. You can pretend all you want that it doesn't matter, but it does matter…it affects us… and you need…"

"Do you know that I was there when it happened?!" His voice raised as he tried to explain to her what he was going through, without actually talking about his feelings. "Whoever informed you, did they tell you that I thought she had died in my arms? That I held her there as she was broken and bleeding? And did they leave out the small bit of information that I could have probably prevented it all?!" His voice was no longer calm. She wanted his emotions, she would get them. He just wished that he could close those doors in his mind for good, and only open the ones with the good memories, not these.

_How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind;_

_Hold memory close at hand,_

_Help me to understand the years._

_(How I wish you were here)_

_How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell._

_How I wish I would save my soul._

_I'm so cold from fear._

He stared at her with the look of pure hatred in his eyes. And it scared Isabella; she had never seen him like this. Normally he was one of the most gentle persons she knew. Without warning Ryan moved back over to the night stand, grabbing his wallet and his keys.

"Ryan where are you going?"

_I guess it's time I run, far far away;_

_Find comfort in pain,_

_All pleasure's the same:_

_It just keeps me from trouble._

_Hide's my true shape,_

_Like Dorian Gray._

_I've heard what they say,_

_But I'm not here for trouble._

_Far, far away; find comfort in pain._

_All pleasure's the same:_

_It just keeps me from trouble._

_It's more than just words:_

_It's just tears and rain._

Ryan shook his head. He couldn't deal with this, not now. He needed to get out of there, clear his head, push the old feelings out of his heart before they started to eat at him once more. Isabella grew frightened and took a step forward to him. She grabbed his arm lightly and spoke. "Ryan wait, there's something you don't know." Ryan ripped his arm away from her but stood his ground. He didn't say a word, just looked at her to go on.

She stood there breathing heavily. Her blood shot eyes were puffy and sore, and her nose was running with immensely hurt feelings. She knew she wasn't supposed to tell Ryan what Summer had found out, that Marissa's memory wasn't completely gone. But she felt like she was losing him. She couldn't lose him, she didn't even think she could live without him. Part of her knew that if he never found out, he would eventually get back to the state they were in; the content happy state of their relationship. But she also knew that that state wasn't real… and she was sick of living a life filled with acting and lies. And if finding out what she really meant to Ryan meant that she had to tell him what she knew, she was willing to do that. It was a risk, and before she spoke she hesitated a great deal. _What if she told him?_ She knew there was a huge chance of him taking off. She didn't date Ryan Atwood for a year and a half and not realize he had a savior complex. But maybe if he knew that she was ok, and that Summer had gone to find her, they would be able to move on. She looked intensely into those deep blue eyes as Ryan waited for her to speak. 

"Marissa, she…" just as she began to speak, there was an obnoxious knock at the door and Seth's face popped up in one of the pool house windows. He only had one eye opened, afraid of what he might see if he fully looked on. But once he saw that the couple was fully dressed he proceeded with opening the pool house doors. "How is my second favorite couple in the entire world doing?" He spoke with a bit of a laugh. "I would say you were my first, but not to sound conceited or anything, but Summer and I are surely much cuter than the two of you. It's true Ryan has the whole young Russell Crow thing going for him, and Izzy, you are definitely a knock out, but Summer and I have this charm that is just…"

"Seth!" Both Ryan and Isabella screamed his name at the same time, getting him to shut up. And with that Seth jumped. He looked startled at the two of them, and realized for the first time that Isabella was crying. He opened his mouth to speak, but he wasn't sure what to say.

"Now is not the time Seth." Isabella informed him, before he could even speak again, trying to sound less harsh. She tried to regain her composure now that Seth was in the room, and began wiping her tears away. But the room fell completely silent and the awkwardness was quite evident.

Seth shuffled his feet a bit, not sure if he should just turn around and walk away or stay and try to fix things. He couldn't help but wonder what he had just walked into. And although he knew he shouldn't be involved, and was actually scared by the tension in the room, his curiosity kept him glued to the floor. He started to tap his toe and looked to Ryan, only to see an angry look upon his face. "Are you guys having problems between the sheets? You know this one time Taylor helped…." Seth continued to fill the room with his ramblings, but this time it was Ryan that interrupted them.

"NO Seth." He began with an annoyance in his voice. "Isabella here was just going to tell me what she knows about Marissa. Mysteriously she knows more about her than I do." He turned back to face her, waiting to hear what she wanted to say.

Seth gasped and quickly spun around, his Jew frow bouncing light as he did. "You can't!" Seth barked out and moved between his friends quickly. "Isabella, you promised…"

Ryan's eyes brows raised. So it was Seth that had spilled the beans after all. He had never been so disappointed with him in his entire life. Instantly he felt betrayal creep into his soul. He looked to him and stared. How could he? After all these years, he thought he had grown up.

"Seth he needs to know." Isabella protested. He wasn't the one that told her about the accident or about Ryan's feelings, all he had revealed was that Summer was in Italy. And now everything made more sense now that she had all the pieces to the puzzle.

Ryan started to get confused. What more was there to know? Was there more to it than Seth telling Isabella everything he had wanted to keep buried the last few years? Ryan looked to Isabella and frowned. But what was bothering him more? The fact that Isabella was quite obviously upset, and it killed him to know he was the cause of that pain, or was it the fact that his closest friends were going behind his back?

"Seth I can't believe that you told her!" He shook his head with disappointment. His voice was full of anger and bitterness.

Suddenly Isabella realized what was going on in Ryan's head. She knew things were all messed up, but she needed to be sure Ryan didn't blame Seth for telling her about Marissa. She knew how close the boys were, and she would never forgive herself if she messed that up. "No Ryan it wasn't him…"

"Ryan, I totally had your back dude, you know I wouldn't do that…" Seth talked at the same time.

It seemed everyone was talking at once. "Then who was it Isabella?" Ryan demanded to know.

Confusion cluttered the air and Isabella grew more impatient by the moment. She could hear Seth rambling on and on about how he had in fact matured, and he even kept Summer's secret for a long time, which was why Isabella couldn't tell anyone. And everyone should be proud of him, because it was definitely a record. At the same time Isabella was trying to convince Seth that Ryan deserved to know. And finally Ryan grew quiet, trying to take it all in. He wasn't sure what anyone was talking about, but he finally understood that they were talking about separate issues.

"Summer will rip me to shreds if she finds out." Seth turned to Isabella, pleading with her to please not tell Ryan.

"Seth, this is important, he deserves to know everything. He won't be able to make his own decisions or heal if everyone keeps trying to shelter him from everything." It was as if Ryan was now out of the room and Seth and Isabella continued to banter back and forth. Seth's hands were flying around in protest, and a look of complete and utter horror glowed in his eyes.

"Ok everyone stop!"

The two bodies turned to look at Ryan, and again silence filled the room. He looked back and forth between two of the most important people in his life, a mixture of feelings flooding him. "Please someone just tell me what is going on."

Seth looked to his brother and took a deep breath. He saw the confusion and pain in his eyes. He hadn't seen that look in awhile, and deep down he knew that Ryan needed to know what Summer was doing. But he was afraid, and wasn't too proud to admit that. Not only was he terrified of the wrath of Summer's fury if she found out he let the cat out of the bag, but he was also horrified of opening Ryan's wounds once more. He hung his head low for a moment, and started to murmur under his breath.

Isabella looked to Seth for a moment, and took it as a sign to go forward. She didn't want to be the one to come between three great long term friendships, but she felt like Ryan needed to know. She took a deep breath, preparing herself for telling Ryan what was going on. She wasn't positive what the outcome would be. Would Ryan leave her? Would she see a side of him she had never known? All she knew is that she needed to risk that because Ryan deserved to know. "Ryan, Summer isn't just in Europe for a vacation." She began slowly. But by Ryan's eyes she could tell that he was already starting to figure out. "She is there to find Marissa."

Ryan stood there for a moment completely speechless. Summer had done what he had sought to do for the past three years. But he was too afraid, afraid that he would hurt her more. He shook his head in disbelief, partly that Summer would risk damaging her best friend more and partly that he hadn't had the courage to do it first. "But Julie said that…"

"Summer thinks that Julie is lying." Seth finally blurted out. He knew now that there was no way in changing Isabella's mind. And he knew he might as well tell Ryan the complete truth; not that he hadn't been dying to do so anyway. "You know she has been studying medicine in school. She has become quite a good little nurse if you ask me." For a moment Seth's mind wandered until Isabella cleared her throat to snap him out of it. "Right….so I didn't realize it, but the driving force behind Summer's new medical passion is of course Marissa." He paused and looked between Ryan and Isabella as he continued to speak. "She is pretty certain that the facts that Julie has been giving us are not medically accurate."

Isabella looked to Seth, surprised that he had finally opened up to Ryan. The information that she had in her head about Summer was only partly speculation. So she let Seth continue. Ryan did the same. He knew that once Seth began the story, there would be no stopping him now, and all he had to do was sit back and wait for it all to come out.

And that is what happened. For the next ten minutes Seth explained to Ryan that Marissa's memory wasn't completely lost. He shared with him Summer's theory about her partial memory loss, and that Julie had been keeping her from them. He explained that Summer didn't want to get anyone's hopes up, but just recently he found out that she had located her. Isabella and Ryan sat there silent, taking it all in. Isabella watching him carefully, trying to figure out what was going on in his head. But his eyes remained blank. It would be a long night. Isabella knew that.

"Grazie." Marissa said as she reached up to pay the cab driver. She opened the door and stepped out onto the cobblestone street. Lake Bracciano was only about thirty minutes out of the city, and only fifteen minutes from her and Julie's borrowed home in Formello. She had stumbled upon this quaint little town within the first few weeks of living in Italy, when she took a wrong turn and ended up near the water. It wasn't long before this place became a safe haven for her. Julie wouldn't go near it; the town itself was too small for her liking. There weren't many places to shop or dine; it was just a small quaint town with great scenery and amazing friendly people. And so whenever she wanted to get away and try to clear her head, this is where she came. No one knew about it, not even Bray.

Marissa made her way over towards the lake. She paused for a moment and just stared into the bright sun as it reflected off of the blue grey liquid chopping away at different things in its mass. This side of the lake was surrounded by a stone wall that many people sat on to look out at the view. But after years of coming here Marissa had found a much better spot to enjoy the lake than looking at it from afar. There was a spot in the wall that had a part in it. Coming from that separation were a set of steep stone stairs that went down towards the lake's edge. In fact after a good rain, the first few steps of the stairs would be covered in the lake's water. The stones were tattered and worn and in parts almost completely washed away. Because of this, the local town had put a 'No Trespassing' sign up due to the potential danger. Still this didn't stop Marissa. Looking both ways Marissa made sure the coast was clear, and just like many times before, she then jumped over the chain that was supposed to prevent people from going forward. If she wanted, she could easily go on the other side of the colossal lake which had a man made beach front and places to go to the waters edge. But Marissa liked this natural feel, where waves would beat against the rocks and the stone wall. More importantly she liked to be alone. Climbing down the steps carefully she paused, and then like so many times before, she jumped over to a near by rather large flat rock that rose high above all the others. Looking up, the wall was a good twenty feet, and no one seemed to bother her there. If she situated herself just right, even if people above her were to look over the edge they wouldn't be able to see her.

Sitting down Marissa curled her legs up into her body and hugged them closely. Resting her chin upon her knees she stared out and watched as the small waves splashed against the rocks in front of her. Once in awhile the wind would pick up, causing a larger wave to lightly spray the freckles on her face. She only welcomed them. She squinted her eyes lightly and took in the feeling that the water gave her. The constant motion of it soothed her soul, and brought a sense of peace to her brain. She sighed and shook her head. What was so familiar about this place? She knew she had never been there before she moved to Italy, and yet it gave her a sense of familiarity she just couldn't explain.

Ryan climbed the familiar wooden ramp to the spot in which he had spent so many key moments in his life. Like the pool house, the lifeguard stand held more than just memories. It brought back intense feelings and familiarities beyond his control. Once at the top he turned around and leaned up against the wooden wall. The sun had long gone to bed and had been replaced by a half crescent moon. Its rays shined upon the water, and Ryan slid down to take a seat in his favorite spot.

He had no idea what to think about all the information he received just an hour previous. Marissa was in Italy and had more memory than Julie led on. Seth and Isabella had filled him in on everything they knew, and yet there were still so many things left unanswered. He had no idea if she even remembered him at all. But she did remember Summer, so that was a good sign right? Surely he was just as important in Marissa's life and remembered him too. He brought his knees up half way and let out a deep sigh.

Ryan had dreamed of hearing the words, "Marissa remembers you," over and over again. But he never thought that it would actually happen. The last three years had been an extremely difficult time in his life, even harder than the beginning years of his life, which was hard to imagine. There had been a great number of people who had just left his existence previous to what he knew now: his father, his mom, Trey, all the people that meant anything to him. When he first came to Newport, he had a wall built up around him. He wasn't about to fall in love with anyone again, just to have them leave his life like the others. But after time he grew to trust people. And just when he thought he could really rely on the human race once again, she was ripped out of his being. It was different this time around, not because it wasn't her fault, but because it was his. Ryan let a hand move up to his forehead, as he massaged his brow. He was getting a headache.

"_I would never sleep with Ryan." _The words ran over and over in Marissa's brain. What exactly was Summer talking about? She had never been more confused. Although she knew her mom wasn't perfect, she never thought that she would lie to her about something so important. But Marissa couldn't help but wonder if she had gotten the whole story. Did she and Ryan date? That just seemed so strange to her. Julie had told her that she hadn't dated anyone really seriously most of high school. When Marissa asked why, Julie just assumed she had been too hurt by Luke. But even that didn't add up the more Marissa thought of it. Sure she loved Luke, but she wasn't in love with him. She hadn't been for most of their relationship. Still, even though she remembered being infatuated with Ryan, wanting to know more, wanting to be with him, it didn't make sense that they had actually dated. So why did Summer say that?

Julie told her she dated around until she met a new guy in school named Koby. _"He has dark brown hair, gorgeous blue eyes, is extremely well bread, and has great abs." _Julie told her as she was trying to fill her in on the memories she had lost. It was weird to her that she had fallen in love with someone she couldn't even remember. But at least the fact that he had blue eyes explained the fact that she kept seeing them in her dreams. But the question in her mind was, if he was so important to her, why did her memory block it out? Then of course there was the Summer issue. After all these years, why would Summer sleep with her boyfriend?

Marissa's brain started to hurt more and more, as she tried to patch things together. If she really had dated Ryan it wouldn't really be that hard to believe. Marissa could still remember the way she felt the first time she met him. She had never had those feelings before. But was she just a silly school girl with a crush on the new guy? She remembered the model home, and even the night of her Cotillion. If it wasn't for Luke, Marissa would have loved to pursue things with him. Ryan made her feel so different, he made her feel alive. And yet she couldn't do that to Luke. She was so confused back then. But that was nothing compared to how confused she was now. Marissa laughed and shook her head. She SHOULD have done that to Luke, after all he did it to her. She leaned her head back and remembered those last nights as if it were yesterday…

_The night was warm, even warmer than expected. The Cohen boy who lived across the street, Summer, Ryan and Marissa had some how found themselves stuck together on a road trip to TJ. Marissa couldn't even remember exactly why she was going with them instead of with her typical ride, Holly. Although the warm Mexican air filled the atmosphere, there was a cold front splitting through the two young teenagers outside at the vending machine. Marissa was wearing a light green tank top, with an adorable frilly pink skirt that sat low on her hips. Ryan was in his typical attire of jeans, a grey button down shirt and of course… a wife beater. _

_Marissa was leaning up against the wall, looking quite annoyed at being stuck in the middle of no where. Secretly she wasn't as annoyed as she seemed. Still she would never admit that, not to anyone, not even herself. She was brought out of her thoughts as Ryan spoke. "So, I have to pick wisely, ding dongs or cheese sticks?_"

_Marissa rolled her eyes, continuing with the act that she didn't want to be there. "I don't know, pick whatever."_

"_I don't care either, so…."_

_Marissa interrupted him. "So I guess we'll all just starve."_

_Ryan looked over to her with a slight glare. He understood that she was upset, but how long was she going to put him through this? "Are you ever going to stop being mad at me?"_

"_I'm not mad at you." Marissa answered almost too quickly. _

"_Right."_

"_Well why would I be mad at you?" She responded with wide eyes, wondering what exactly he was thinking."_

_Ryan let out a light inaudible sigh. "Because you walked in on me with another girl?"_

_But now Marissa didn't need to pretend that she was annoyed. Jumping on his words quickly she responded. "Actually, I think she was a woman. But why would I care about that?"_

"_I don't know. Shouldn't be a problem."_

"_There is no problem."_

_Ryan shook his head and returned his attention back to the vending machine. "Except ding dongs or cheese sticks."_

"_I don't care, Ryan! I really don't care about cheese sticks, I don't care about ding dongs and I really don't care that I walked in on you with some girl, or woman, whatever!"_

_There was no need to pretend anymore. They both knew what the real issue was. And although Marissa was telling him she didn't care, he knew better. "The only reason I was with her was because you were CLEARLY back with Luke."_

"_I was NOT back with Luke." Marissa protested._

"_But you are now right?"_

"_Right."_

"_Good." _

_There was a soft silence between the two as Ryan answered. But Marissa continued. "Great, so we'll just go to Mexico, split up so we don't have to talk to each other ever again."_

"_Sounds like a plan." Ryan paused but then went on, "By the way, you could've knocked first."_

"_Did you ever wonder why I went to the pool house to find you?" Marissa asked, trying to open up to him. _

"_Everyday. Here's your chance. Clear the air. Tell me." Ryan looked at her intently, waiting for an answer. _

_Marissa took a deep breath. She couldn't tell him, she was embarrassed and confused, and now she WAS back with Luke. Changing the subject she spoke. "Cheese sticks. I hate ding dongs."_

Ryan thought back to the look on Isabella's face as she listened to Seth tell them both what Summer had found out. He avoided making direct eye contact with her for fear of what he might reveal himself. But when she wasn't paying attention, Ryan looked to her green eyes. He wondered what she was thinking. There seemed to be a good mixture of sadness, worry and pain written across her face. He knew Isabella well enough to know she was genuinely concerned for Marissa's well being (even though she had never met her). It was in her nature to help people and care for them, just like it was his. It was part of what made them work so well together. But he also knew that she was scared for other reasons as well.

Ryan opened his eyes again and looked out at the ocean's waves. They splashed up onto the shore with vigor, knowing that they belonged there and what their purpose was. If only Ryan could be as determined as the forceful water in front of him. He once was that guy. But things had changed, and he wasn't sure what his purpose was anymore. Awhile back he knew he was meant to be with Marissa, he was meant to protect her, and to save her from anything that tried to harm her, and most of all to love her. But since the accident, that world had shattered. He hadn't really fooled himself, and he knew that deep down he hadn't completely moved on from her, no matter how hard he tried. The problem was, it wasn't just about him and her anymore. He had brought someone else into his life, into this mess. Though his intentions were innocent at first, he knew now that it was a mistake. He shut his eyes again and groaned. Pictures of Isabella ran through his mind. Her long dark curly hair, her perfect curves, and her full lips that would always curl into a smile when he teased her, she was beautiful, and she was his. Although Ryan was reluctant at first to let her into his life, he knew that she was amazing, and she loved him. She was the type of girl that a lot of guys dreamed for, and yet she wanted him. And the thing was, he truly did love Isabella now. It took awhile, but he could honestly admit that. The thought of hurting her drove him crazy. But he couldn't help but to think 'he needed to do this.' Part of him wanted to hop on the next plain to Italy and resume the role of Marissa's savior, but had his reigns been taken away from him? Maybe she didn't even need him anymore. Maybe he had to let her go.

But he couldn't. He had to know if she remembered him, he had to help her. The other part of him knew that by saving Marissa it would be breaking someone else. Was he capable of hurting that someone? He stared out into the ocean again, and with his thoughts, his eyes began to lose focus. Slowly he stood back up, making his way back to his car… and back to the pool house.

Marissa knew that she wasn't ready to face Summer or her mother. But she couldn't stay at the lake forever. She just didn't know who to trust anymore, and it frustrated her to the point of wanting to scream and pull her hair out. Seeing her best friend did more than just throw her for a loop. The moment their eyes met, she longed to hug her. She missed her so much, and part of her knew that she was the solution to all her unanswered questions. But could she trust her? Julie's stories were never very detailed, but they always held a great bit of passion, and she was after all her mother. All this time despite her and Julie's differences, she truly had trusted her with her life, but maybe she was wrong in doing so. She just didn't know what to think anymore. All she knew was that she didn't want to run from this, she needed to know what was going on.

And yet Marissa knew she couldn't go home, to Bray's and the restaurant was completely out of the question. Marissa didn't want to face anyone of her past of her present right now. Leaning up against part of what was left of the ruins of the fall of Rome, Marissa felt this place was appropriate for her mood.

"Marissa, Bonjourno." A think Italian accent spoke softly, and Marissa turned around to face him.

Marissa turned and smiled softly, letting her arms fall to her sides and standing up taller, trying to appear brave. If she could convince him, maybe she could convince herself. "Hi, thanks for coming."

Marcello smiled sweetly, flashing his yellow and blue eyes at her and approached her somewhat timidly. When he got a call from the restaurant telling him that Marissa wanted to meet him he was shocked. No, he was astonished! He was in Summer's hotel room, trying to calm her down from their encounter with Julie when he got the call. He stood there with his mouth opened, completely taken back by Marissa's request. Speaking frantically in Italian he watched as an antsy Summer paced the room asking 'what', and 'who is it?' After hanging up the phone and informing her what the call was about, Summer stood there even more bewildered than he was. _"Why you?" _She asked him, but all he could do was shrug. Immediately Summer wanted to go with him, and didn't hesitate to tell him so. But Marcello informed her that Marissa had left very explicit instructions, and for some really bizarre reason, she wanted to talk to him and only him. Reluctantly Summer let him go, but not without making him promise to call her as soon as he could. Which led him here. He saw Marissa off in the distance, her long, delicate body leaned up against one of Rome's most precious pieces of history. Though she was gorgeous, and had the look of a stunning European Model, she couldn't look any more out of place.

"Of course." He started as he moved even closer to her. "But you know, Summer is back at her hotel, waiting to see you, if you want I can tak…"

Marcello was immediately cut off by Marissa as she spoke. "I can't face her right now." The two looked at each other, and Marcello just nodded in understanding. He still wasn't sure why she wanted him here, but he was happy to oblige if it meant helping her in anyway. "I know you probably don't understand why I called for you." Marissa continued.

"Well most everyone finds me most fabulous, so I can understand if you just can't get enough of me." He winked and smiled a little, trying to lighten the mood, and to let her know that he was in fact her friend in this situation.

Marissa laughed and shook her head. But his planned had worked; with the laughter her body relaxed, and she felt more at ease with him. For some reason she knew she could trust him, even if she couldn't trust anyone else. She let her shoulders relax a bit and got straight to the point. "How do you know Summer?"

Marcello watched her carefully, trying to read her body language to get a feel for where she was going with this. "Bella?" He began and smiled. "I met her just a bit ago when she rammed her feisty little body right into me, and practically knocked me over." He laughed, remembering their first encounter and telling his slightly different version of it. "That girl may be little but she sure does have power and determination."

Again Marissa chuckled noting that Summer really were all those things he described. Marcello watched her, and saw a hint of complete joy in her eyes. He had seen that same look when he first told Summer that he knew Marissa. "She just came into town; she has been looking for you since the beginning of the summer. I always tell her it is fate that we bumped into each other, you know seeing how I work for your…." He paused, almost saying something harsh towards Julie, but knowing he didn't want to get started on the wrong foot. "…for Joseppi and your mother."

Marissa shook her head and took a deep breath. "It's ok, whatever you were going to say about my mother I am sure she deserves it." Again their eyes met, and another point of understanding was made. "I… I don't understand why she has been looking for me. I mean when I left Newport we weren't even friends, why would she care about my well being?"

Marcello sighed and shook his head. He knew that he had to convince her that Summer and her were friends, and this may take awhile. He moved over to a portion of the ruins that were small enough for him to sit on. He jumped up and sat down, and then patted the seat next to him. To his surprise Marissa agreed and followed suit. "Marissa, I don't know what your mother has told you, but according to Summer the two of you were the best of friends and she has missed you more than a Matador misses his capote!"

Marissa sighed softly and shook her head. "It doesn't makes sense. Why would my mom tell me that Summer and I weren't friends? After all we have been through, I never really thougth that Summer would stoop to the level that Holly once did. I thought she was different."

"That is because she is different!" Marcello said exasperated. "I've only known my Bella for a very short time, but she is the most loyal friend I have ever had. Not to mention she has the most gorgeous hair." He winked and nudged her shoulder again lightly.

"But someone is lying. Either Summer, or my mother, and I just don't know who to believe right now." Deep down and on a subconscious level, Marissa knew who to trust. But for some reason, she just couldn't admit that to herself.

"Do you think that Summer would prance all the way through Europe just to find you after all these years if you weren't friends?" Marcello pointed out the most obvious point. He didn't want to call Julie a liar. Ok well he did, but he respected Marissa enough to not call out her mother. She would figure it out sooner or later on her own. "She has wasted her entire summer vacation just for you. Now THAT is what I call a sacrifice."

Marissa sat there for a few moments, completely silent. She had spent a lot of time at the lake just thinking, and had pretty much come to the same conclusion on her own. The way that Summer spoke in the shopping center, she knew that she was so happy to see her, and at the same time so angry at Julie. But she needed to have it confirmed by someone else.

"If my mother has kept me from my best friend all this time…" she trailed off as her eyes started to water lightly as more and more questions raised in her mind. She held back the tears and continued. "Why would she do that? Summer could have helped me remember…. She could have helped me find myself again." She looked to Marcello, a few tears now escaping her eyes. She pleaded with him with just a look to just explain it to her.

"I don't know Marissa, maybe Julie didn't want to confuse you any more." He spoke the words, but not believing any of them as they left his mouth. Julie was a class act bitch in his eyes, and he couldn't imagine her reasons for keeping Marissa from her friends were anything but selfish.

"Maybe." Marissa spoke softly and looked out into the distance, where the sun was shaded behind hundreds of broken stone pieces. It filtered through them, casting shadows every which way. The parts where the sun came through showed off the most gorgeous green grass, mixed with purple, yellow and red flowers. But the parts where the stones blocked the sun's rays were left dark and cold. It was exactly how Marissa felt. She only knew small glimpses of her life, the rest were hidden from her mind's eye. After some more silence Marissa's tears began to flow freely once more.

"Marcello, I'm so confused. I feel…" she took a deep breath and as she let it out she started to choke up, the tears turning into sobs. "…. I feel so lost."

Marcello's heart started to break as he saw Marissa begin to weep. He had no idea how he had gotten himself into the middle of all this. Sometimes he thought that drama found him. But he knew he was there for a reason, and he wanted to help her just as much as he wanted to help Summer. "Marissa…" he spoke softly and wrapped his arms around her. "Summer found you… she loves you." He rubbed her back softly. "I am sure you will find your way."

Ryan returned to the pool house as the sun was waking up in the morning sky. He still wasn't sure what he was supposed to do, but the one thing that he had decided was that he needed to talk to Isabella. Really talk to her. He needed to tell her everyone of his past, and to the best of his ability open up to her. He was terrified he wouldn't be able to do it, and if he did, he was only hoping that she would understand. Without knocking he twisted the doorknob and took a deep breath. As he exhaled he pushed the door open. Expecting to see Isabella sleeping in his bed, he was surprised to see that the bed was still made and Isabella was no where in site.

"Izzy?" He called out, moving further into his room while looking around. He suddenly panicked, was it too late, had he lost her already? He ran over to where he left his cell phone the night before to see if he had any messages. He flipped open his phone only to see that he didn't have any. He sighed and started to head back out towards the main house to see if she was in there. Just as he opened the door again he heard a voice.

"I'm here." It was a voice barely capable of being heard and Isabella stood there in a fresh pair of clothes with her hair wet from the shower she had just had.

Ryan turned around and let out a sigh of relief. He shut the door once more and looked over to his girlfriend. At first he wanted to hug her, to take her in his strong arms and tell her that he was sorry. But instead he stood there, unable to move. "I… I thought you were gone."

Isabella shook her head. She hadn't slept a wink all night, thinking about what was going to happen between her and Ryan. She had no doubt in her mind that she loved him with all her heart. But seeing Ryan the way he was when he found out about Marissa made her realize that he just wasn't sure where his heart lay. "I thought about it, but then I realized that I shouldn't be the one going." She moved over to the bed, and for the first time Ryan realized that her duffle bag was out, and she was packing.

Ryan wasn't completely sure what as going on. But he knew he didn't want her to leave. "Isabella listen, I know that things have been really weird for us lately, but you have to know that I love you and…"

"Ryan please just stop." She turned around to face him. Her eyes were red, but she was all cried out. Today, she would not let Ryan see her tears. "I understand what you are going through." She continued and then placed another item in the bag.

Ryan face immediately went cold. He wanted to tell her that there was no possible way that she could understand. She had never lost the love of her life, she had never had to see him dying in her arms… or then face the fact that he was alive, but had forgotten all about her. But he knew that she was trying, and it wouldn't be appropriate for him to start in like that. "Iz, I know that you know what happened now, but you can't possibly…"

Isabella could feel her anger starting to rise again. He wasn't going to tell her that she couldn't understand. No she had never been in an accident with the love of her life, nor had she had to deal with losing him in a way that he had. But she did understand losing someone, whether he knew it or not. "Can't possibly understand what you are going through?" She finished his sentence for him and raised a brow. "I think that I do." She left the words like that. What Ryan couldn't see was that he was the love of her life, and she felt like she was losing him.

The words hit Ryan like a Mack Truck hitting the side of a brick building. He blinked and fell silent for a moment. "Iz, I tried to push you away…. I… I wasn't ready, but you…"

"Don't you dare blame me for this Ryan. I waited almost two years for you, and I never once pushed you into anything!" She couldn't believe he was saying this, that he was blaming her for opening up to her. "Are you going to tell me that you never loved me now, and that it was all my fault that you moved on from her?" Her words were harsh. This is not how she expected this conversation to go, but he had opened up the can of worms and there was no closing them now. Ryan remained silent and so she took advantage and continued. "You asked me out Ryan, you told ME that you loved me. I never held you back from going anywhere!"

"I do love you." Ryan protested. He moved over and sat on the edge of the bed, his head falling into his hands again. He could feel the tears coming again, but he couldn't let them go, he had to be strong. He had never cried in front of anyone, and he wasn't going to now.

Isabella watched him move to the bed in defeat and sighed. No matter how angry she wanted to be at him, she knew that he was going through something really difficult, more difficult than she could even imagine. And she knew what she needed to do.

"Look Ryan, lets not fight." She moved over to the bed and sat down beside him. "I know you love me…." She smiled for a moment and spoke again. "I would like to think that I can read people pretty well, and not even Ryan Atwood can hide his true feelings from me….. I know you can't get enough of me." She teased him, but it was partly true. Although Ryan had kept his whole heart away from her all this time, she knew he cared for her, and their chemistry was undeniable. She had dated him for quite awhile now, and although she had her share of insecurities, she knew he at least loved her, on some level. The problem was, did he love her enough? There was only one way to find out.

Ryan was thankful for the joke and light hearted tone Isabella's voice changed into. He knew he didn't want to fight with her. He didn't want to hurt her an ounce more than he already had. It was just challenging; he didn't want to admit that he brought her into this mess and risked breaking her heart… her huge, beautiful heart. "It's true Izzy, please know that." He said as he looked up.

Isabella managed to let another smile form on her lips, and she placed a hand on his arm. "I know Ryan." That moment their eyes met, and her entire body warmed. She wanted nothing more than to kiss him, to hold him, and to get lost in his world. They both sat there silent, and although neither of them knew it, they were coming to a mutual understanding.

"Which is why I want you to go." Isabella said as she stood up. The tears were filling up behind her eyes and if she looked at him any longer she knew they would break out. She moved back over to the night stand and reached behind the wall to take out Ryan's cell phone charger. Moving back over to the bag she placed it inside.

For the first time Ryan realized she wasn't packing a bag for herself, but for him. His eyes widened and he immediately stood up to lightly grab her hand. He knew he wanted to go to Marissa, his entire body, mind and heart needed to see her again. But he didn't want to lose Isabella in the process. He was confused. "Isabella wait, I'm not going to go anywhere." He stuttered, obviously unsure of himself.

Isabella looked up at him and let out a small laugh. "I knew you would say that." She smiled softly and took another deep breath. "Or at least I hoped. Your loyalty is so strong Ryan, and I know you don't want to hurt me." Ryan opened his mouth up to protest but she continued. "But I also can see in your eyes that you need to do this."

She moved back over to his desk and grabbed the plane ticket she had gotten him the previous night while he was out 'clearing his head.' "You don't have to make the decision Ryan, I made it for you." She reached her hand out and handed him the ticket. She swallowed hard, and felt herself start to shake. _Don't cry Isabella… do NOT cry._ She told herself. If she wanted to be convincing to Ryan, she needed to be strong.

Ryan looked to the ticket that was now in his hands. It was a round trip ticket from LAX to Rome. He couldn't believe his eyes. He looked back up to her and could feel his heart start beating faster and faster. He was speechless, and he just didn't know what to do. He was going to go see her, after all this time… and he had never been so anxious.

Although they were both silent, Isabella could see the look of anticipation on his face. And though she knew that this was going to be his reaction all along, she still hoped deep down that he would surprise her. She though that her heart couldn't break anymore, but in that moment she felt as if someone took the already shattered pieces and stomped on them. "Ryan, go." She instructed him. He needed to find out what Marissa still meant to him, and if there was still a chance to be with her. Isabella knew that if she was ever going to get his entire heart, she had to let him go.

"Izz…" Ryan barely choked out. He looked back down to the ticket and saw that his hand was shaking. He looked back up to Isabella who had moved over to the bag and got it from the bed. She returned and handed it to him.

"Hurry up, Seth is in the Range Rover waiting for you." Ryan didn't know what to say yet again. Just then he heard a honk and knew that this was really all happening. He moved in to wrap his arms around Isabella. But she took a step back. "No Ryan, just go!" This time her voice seemed urgent. And it was, if he didn't leave that instant, she knew she would grab a hold of him and never let him out of her site. This was the biggest risk she had ever taken, but she knew she needed to do it.

Ryan was a bit taken back by her lack of affection. He needed to at least tell her goodbye. But she wouldn't allow it. She turned around, so that her back was to him, and he had nothing left to do but walk out the door.

As soon as she was sure that he was gone, Isabella buckled onto the bed, crying deeply into the pillows. Moments later, Kirsten made her way into the pool house. Her motherly instinct telling her not to use any words, she simply sat on the bed and placed her hand upon Isabella's back, rubbing it softly for comfort. Isabella quickly sat up, and collapsed into a loving embrace with her.

"Dude what took you so long?" Seth asked as soon as Ryan opened the back door to throw his bag in, and then shut it to get into the passenger side. He had been waiting in the driveway for nearly twenty minutes, tapping his fingers anxiously on the steering wheel.

Ryan looked to his brother, and although he was completely torn on just exactly how to feel, he actually let out a very small but noticeable smile. "Just drive Seth."

Seth didn't need to be told twice, he put the car into gear and backed out of the driveway. "Can you believe we are going to Italy?"

Ryan's head snapped around and looked at his brother. "We?"

_Song: Tears & Rain by James Blunt_


	9. The Confrontation

_Chapter 9: The Confrontation_

"Cohen, where the hell are you?" Summer was pacing the plush carpeted floors of her hotel room and paused for a moment in the mirror to look at herself. Her petite foot tapped lightly on the pale green floor as she used one hand to hold her cell phone to her ear, and the other to smooth out her dark russet brown hair. His phone just rang, and rang, or rather sang the latest Death Cab song to her before going to voice mail yet again. She had been alone for hours, and her patience was waning more than she'd like to admit. It had been practically all night and she hadn't spoken with anyone. Marcello was out with Marissa, and she hadn't heard from him in over three hours. This was driving her completely bonkers. The last time she had gotten a hold of him for only a brief moment, he and Marissa had talked about a number of things, but he couldn't really get into specifics. Most importantly, Marissa still wasn't ready to see Summer. For some reason she was opening up to Marcello like he was her long best friend. And although she was a little jealous, Summer couldn't blame her. He was a good guy, and easy to talk to. But the problem was, she wanted to be there with her, telling her the truth, getting her best friend back. She was impatient. And yet she knew that if Marissa needed time, then she had to give it to her. She couldn't imagine how lost and confused she must feel, and so Summer had to try her best to just wait. But what better way was there to pass the time than to call Seth and take her frustrations out on him? Problem was Seth wasn't answering his phone.

"Grrr Seth, if I find out your scrawny ass is watching Anime with Captain Oats instead of answering your phone, I'm going to smother you." She flipped her phone shut and thought a moment. After a few seconds of silence she flipped her phone back open and dialed a new number. Plopping down on the edge of the bed, she waited again to a familiar ring.

"Are you sure that you want to do this?" Marcello stood next to the tall and slender blonde outside of his boss' house. He turned his gaze towards her with a look of compassion. "I mean this is a lot to take in for just one day. We've been up all night, and I know you must be tired both physically and mentally. If you'd rather wait til tomorrow, I'm sure that Summer with unde…"

"No, I need to do this." She interrupted before he could finish his thought. "Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?" Marissa was a bit disheveled, but forced half a smile before turning serious again. Her normally gorgeous blue-green eyes were a bit blood shot from all the crying she had done the night before. Her cheeks were streaked with mascara and her clothes were rumpled. They had spent all night talking about what Marissa had gone through during her time in Italy: the confusion, the heart ache, the frustration. She explained to him she didn't remember three years of her life, and in return he gave her all the information he could about how Summer had been trying to find her and her theories on Julie keeping her from those who loved her in Newport. He stayed away from any stories of Ryan, because frankly there was so much more for him to know, and he definitely didn't want to mix anything up. She was confused enough as it was. So of course he told her that he didn't know all the details, which only left Marissa wanting to know more. But there was something about talking to someone not directly involved that just helped a lot. It had been a long night, and she was tired, but not too exhausted to face her mother. She was so furious at her, and the thought of confronting her only gave her the strength she needed.

Marcello couldn't help but beam. The last fifteen hours had proven to be quite interesting. It had been a long time since he had stayed up all night and chatted with a beautiful woman. They had covered a lot of ground; and yet there was still so much more to deal with. But in that time, he had seen a change in Marissa, even if it was just in the span of one night. Spending that time with her, he realized why Summer loved her so much. It was an exhausting night, but one he wouldn't change for anything. It was amazing to see her gain the confidence she needed to confront her mother. And so he just nodded softly to her, and let her proceed without further discussion.

Marissa took a deep breath, she pondered for a moment, ringing the doorbell, but the fiery ferocity inside of her told her that she didn't have enough patience. Instead, she reached up to turn the door knob and shoved the entrance open. "Mom!" She called out instantly in a demanding tone and looked around for her.

Marcello fell in behind her as Marissa made her way through the house with determination. He wasn't sure what was going to come out of this little altercation, but he was proud of Marissa nonetheless. He knew from what Summer had told him, that Julie wasn't going to admit to anything. But if doing this gave Marissa the vigor she needed to go and see Summer, he was all for it.

"Julie!" Marissa screamed again. She wasn't in the mood to wait for her, she had waited around for three years for answers, and knowing all along that her mother had some of them, she surely wasn't going to hold off any longer.

"Maybe she and Joseppi are out by the…"

"Pool." Marissa finished his sentence, and stormed off towards the back entrance of the house.

Once again, Marcello followed in tow behind Marissa and on through Joseppi's ostentatious residence, down the hall and out the back through the gorgeous French double doors. The large villa was absolutely gorgeous and unique, unlike the McMansion's the Cooper girls were used to in Newport. The ancient looking stone walk way led around the house and to the marble in-ground pool. Flowing into the pool were triple marble fountains shaped as Roman gods, keeping in the traditional Italian style, causing the water to always be rippling and giving it the effect of something in nature rather than man made. Marcello had never seen it before, and if he wasn't there on a mission, he would definitely take a moment to be quite impressed.

As soon as they rounded the corner the couple came into view. Julie, wearing without flaw, an off white string bikini with a matching wrap, was lounging in a lawn chair, martini in hand while Joseppi did laps in the crystal blue pool. Marissa started walking towards them when Julie finally noticed that they were there.

"Marissa honey, oh my god, you are ok." She quickly got out of the chair and stood to greet her daughter. Although, Julie was dressed to kill and appeared to be calm and collected, as she came closer to Marissa you could see the look of anxiety in her eyes. "I have been worried sick about you, I called your cell at least a dozen times but you didn't answer, I thought you had run away… I…"

"You look real concerned mother." Marissa hissed, noting silently that her mom was lounging by the pool and not out looking for her as she suggested.

Julie immediately fell hushed, guilt written upon her pale face. She began speaking again, but this time a bit more meekly, "I went looking for you, and I called Bray and your doctor, and Joseppi called some of his friends. After a few hours Joseppi suggested that we ju…"

"I don't want to hear it." Marissa stated flatly and placed one hand on her hip. She didn't want to hear her mother's excuses. She knew they would be fabricated and completely lame. And she just didn't care. "I'm not here to listen to your excuses, I'm here to…"

"Marissa, thank god." Another familiar voice came out of the villa, shutting his cell phone at the same time. "Your mother and I have been worried sick about you." Bray reached out to embrace his girlfriend, but Marissa stood still. He hesitated for a moment, but then engulfed her into his long arms and held her tight. Marissa accepted the hug, but remained motionless underneath it.

"Bray, this has nothing to do with you. " She said into his chest. Inside she was confused and scared, but her tone stayed determined and strong. She had no reason to be angry with Bray, but the fact that he was there with her mother made him guilty by association. She was so full of fury, and planned on taking it out on anyone she could.

Once she spoke these words Bray surrendered and pulled away from her. He looked down into her tired eyes and shook his head. "You look exhausted, I know that you've been through a great deal. As soon as your mother told me who you ran into I…"

Marissa blinked for a moment. Really what did _he_ know about Summer? What had her mother told him, and why did he seem so concerned? She stared into his eyes a bit more, trying to search his soul for answers. But just like always she came up unfulfilled.

"Finding Bella is the best thing that could have happened to her!" Marcello spoke up for his new friends. He had a strong need to defend his new Summer especially, and found himself become more overprotective than he thought possible. They were kindred souls after all, and after only a short time he felt extremely close to Summer and the situation. "You need to let her talk." Now that Bray was involved, he knew it wouldn't be as easy for Marissa to just speak up for herself. And he needed to let her know, that she wasn't alone; he was in her corner.

By this time Joseppi had gotten out of the water and was drying his hair off as he approached the group. "What are you doing here Marcello?" He wondered why one of his servers was at his home. Back in the day when he was a bachelor, he would have parties all the time, and invite most of the staff. But Julie had put an end to them being a part of the festivities a long time ago. Most of the staff hadn't seen his new house, and most considered him not as good to work for either.

Marcello looked to his boss and was unsure of what exactly to say. If he got involved in all this, he risked losing his job. But right now, this was more important. Besides lets face it, he already was involved. He took a step closer to Marissa and put his hand on her shoulder. "I'm with Marissa."

Joseppi opened his mouth to speak but Julie waved him off with her hand. He obeyed her silent wishes to be hushed and let Julie intervene.

"Marissa, honey, Bray and I understand that…"

"That for the last three years you have done nothing but lie to me!?" Marissa practically screamed. She knew that if she let her mom speak, she wouldn't be able to get out exactly how she felt. "Why did you keep me away from her mother? She was my best friend!"

Suddenly the crowd fell silent. Marissa's outrage left them speechless. Julie didn't know her daughter had it in her, and visions of what their relationship was like back in Newport came back to her. She tried to search for the right words, but all that came out were a few stammers. The men stood around the two females and waited for someone's next move.

"She could have helped me remember mother, she could have been the key to helping me get better!" Marissa could feel the tears start to swell up once more. She had no idea just how much her mother had lied to her. She knew now that there was probably no Koby, but what else had her mother made up about her last three years of high school? Marissa wanted to know, and she demanded to know now.

"Marissa, it was for your own good." Julie started, sounding as if she were trying to convince herself as well as Marissa. "Summer hasn't talked to your doctors, she could have done more damage if I let her see you." She paused and looked, but Marissa remained quiet, waiting for more of an explanation. Julie hesitated more, but fortunately for her, came up with something more to say. "Honey, I love you, you know that I would do anything for you… I was just doing what the professionals told me to do. I wanted you to get better… I…" She prayed for another interruption. Julie was searching for what to say now. She glared at Marcello, knowing he had a lot to do with this. Suddenly her anger shifted. "You!" She pointed a finger at him and glared at him with eyes of fire. "Don't believe a word he says Marissa, he doesn't know your past, he doesn't know what's best for you."

Marissa looked to Marcello and shook her head. He opened his mouth to defend himself, but there was no need, Marissa did it for him. "He has done more for me in one night then you have in three years." She screamed at her. "At least he listens to me."

Julie's pale face started to redden; she couldn't possibly mean that. She had given up her entire life just to make a better one for Marissa. If she only knew what she had sacrificed to bring here there: Neil, Jimmy and Kaitlin, having the Cohen's as friends, her place as a Newport Socialite... the list went on and on. "Marissa, if you'll just sit down and talk with me about this, I am sure I can help you to understand." She reached out for her daughter but Marissa snapped back.

"I'm done trying to understand you Mother." She began, the more she talked to her, the more courage she got. "You've kept me from my friends for three years, and it's been long enough."

This time Bray tried to interject, he stepped closer to the Cooper duo and took a deep breath. "Marissa she hasn't kept you from anything important, your doctor's said that keeping you from Newport and your old life would help you to concentrate on your future instead of dwelling on your past."

Marissa turned her attention to Bray. She didn't understand why she felt like he wasn't on her side. Didn't he understand how much it meant to her to know her past? She shook her head and took a deep breath. "Not important? She shook her head again. "Neither of you understand." She looked from him to her mother. She didn't think that it was possible to cry again, but she could feel the tears start to swell once more. She couldn't do it though, she couldn't cry in front of them.

Marcello saw her starting to get emotional, and took a step forward to wrap his arm around her shoulder. "If you want to go, we can just leave." He whispered to her, but not so quiet that Julie didn't hear. "Summer is waiting for us at the hotel…"

"No she can't just leave, she is MY daughter, and I know what is best for her." Julie looked to the two of them, and could feel her life start to crumble… she couldn't let that happen. "Marissa, this is a huge issue, and Dr. Matassa said he would schedule an additional session this week to help you work through it."

Marissa shook her head and backed away. "No. No more doctors." She moved away from Marcello's grasp and put her hands up to avoid anyone coming closer to her. Marissa had had enough doctors poke at her and her brain the last three years. They tried to psychoanalyze her, council her, and even tried to medicate her. But obviously they hadn't helped her much at all. So the last thing that she wanted was to see another doctor. It made her ill to think about spilling her guts again only to have them say, 'the best thing to do is focus on your future.'

Marcello let her go and watched as she continued to back away. He wasn't sure what to do, so he just stood there. Bray tried to push past Julie to grab a hold of Marissa, and this was Marcello's chance to stand in the way. "Look, just let her go." He instructed him, and put his hand on his chest to try to push him back.

Bray looked down to him and raised a brow. They weren't far off in height, but Bray was definitely broader than Marcello and could easily take him physically. He stood his ground and looked up to see Marissa turn around and start walking away.

"Marissa, wait." Julie walked by the two boys and towards her daughter. She grabbed a hold of Marissa's arm and spun her around.

"No mother, I'm leaving… I'm going to talk with her, and find out the truth." Her voice was now a bit shaky, but she knew what she had to do.

As soon as Marissa turned her gaze away from them, Bray had shoved Marcello out of the way, causing him to fall backwards. It seemed to have all happened in extremely slow motion. He was on the edge of the pool and tried desperately to stay balanced so to not to fall backwards into the cool liquid. "Marssia!" He shouted, but the more he tried, the more his arms flew all over. The look on his face was priceless, it was just too bad no one had seen it. Just as he thought he had saved himself, he found himself losing completely control and fell back into the blue liquid. But not even the big splash into the pool had caused much of a stir with the others. Only Marissa hesitated in her movements.

"Let me go with you." Bray insisted and came around to face Marissa as well.

Marissa tried to pull away from her mother's grasp, but her grip was too strong. "Let me go Mom, you can't stop this." She looked back to Marcello and saw him overwhelmed with trying to get out of the pool At the same time, she struggled for a bit to get away from her mother It wasn't until Bray pulled Julie away and Marcello found his way out of the pool that Marissa finally got free. Marissa looked up and met his eyes, a single tear falling down her already reddened face. With her eyes she told him 'thank you' but then shook her head and continued on.

At this time Marcello had regained his composure and ran past Julie and Bray. "See you later," he said in triumph. He was so proud of Marissa, and couldn't wait for her to finally come with him to see Summer. He just hoped that after all this emotion, frustration and pain, what was to come would be something positive for her.

"Marissa!" Julie called out, but Bray held her back. "Julie stop." Joseppi came up behind them, and the three watched as Marcello and Marissa disappeared from their view.

"She can't go speak with her… if she does it'll be ruined! Everything will just be ruined" Julie told them with a panic stricken voice. If they looked close enough, they might just see a tear forming in her eye. Julie tried once more to go after her, but this time Joseppi held on to her as well.

"Let her go Jules, let her go."

Bray looked to Julie, terror filled his own eyes. If Marissa found out too much of her past, would she leave him? He reached up and scratched the back of his head. "Don't worry. " He spoke, trying to assure himself as much as he was Julie. He gave Julie a reassuring nod anyway and finished, "She'll be back, and she'll listen to me."

"Seth, are you sure that this is the right place?" Ryan looked around his scenery and tried to take it all in. It was so much different from Newport that was for sure. As a matter of fact, it was unlike any other place he had ever been. This of course, said little, considering Ryan had not traveled all that much. It was just so breathtaking, just like all the pictures he had seen in his history of architecture text books. A smile fell across his well defined face. As much as he despised the fact that Julie had hidden Marissa from him all these years, he definitely didn't blame her for her choice in geography.

Ryan and Seth had phoned Summer as soon as they landed. After some 'stealth investigation,' Seth found out where Marissa was living. But Ryan had yet to be convinced that this was the right place or not. It had been a scary journey from Rome to this small town. Streets were narrow, and it seemed they were going in circles. All wineries and churches were beginning to look the same and watching Seth drive the incredibly too small car, with his Jew Fro rubbing against the ceiling was at least amusing.

"Have faith in me buddy, just a little bit of faith." Seth patted Ryan on the shoulder and smiled. "You'll see your lady love soon enough."

Ryan glared at Seth and shook his head. He decided to just let this one slide. If there was something he had learned in the last six years of being a pseudo-Cohen, it was that sometimes you just had to let Seth talk and ignore his ridiculous comments. It was no use really, because no matter what Ryan said in his own defense, once Seth had something in his mind it was impossible to change it. Marissa was not and hadn't been in a long time his 'lady of anything'. He was there because he wanted to help her, not because he wanted to swipe her off her feet and try to bring her home. At least that is what he kept trying to tell himself. His brain was definitely clouded. Things seemed blurred and he had no idea what was going to happen once he set eyes on the one girl that had changed his life. He just hoped that all the emotions he was battling with would stay in check. The last thing he wanted was to become the old Ryan Atwood he had tried so hard to keep buried.

"Let's just go around back and find Summer." Ryan suggested to Seth and took a step on the stone sidewalk that seemed to lead around the house. He wasn't sure why, he just had a gut feeling that this was the way he needed to go.

Seth smiled and nodded. "Good plan Atwood, good plan." He watched as his brother took off, and fell in line with him.

As soon as the brotherly duo stepped off towards the back, it seemed as if the scenery had suddenly changed. The sun was setting, leaving a soft red glow around the trees and other contiguous structures, and the surroundings around Ryan were becoming slightly a blur. His focus was on just one thought: seeing her for the first time in three years. What would she look like? Would she smell the same? Most importantly, would she be receptive to him? Even Seth's ramblings were drowned out by the sound of Ryan's heart practically beating out of his chest. He was beyond nervous, that was for sure. And he really had no idea what to expect.

Rounding the corner, Ryan took a deep breath. Visions of the Marissa he once knew assaulted his brain. Her long, slender legs that went on for days, led up to the most amazing body he had every seen. It was thin and yet still contained the most beautiful curves. He had dated girls with nice bodies before, ones that weren't normally that lean, but for some reason her body suited Marissa perfectly. Her gorgeous wavy blonde locks, curled around her angelic face perfectly, framing the most gorgeous eyes and beautiful smile. He loved getting lost in those eyes. It had been years, but he still remembered the sparkle in them. And his favorite part was those freckles. He knew every single one of them. He was on overload, and before he knew it, he found himself walking at a much faster pace. Yes he was anxious, but his excitement took over his soul as he thought of what it would be like to connect gazes with those gorgeous green-blue eyes of hers once more.

He stepped into the back yard, practically in a full on run now. Seth was long forgotten. He wasn't sure what to expect, but right now he didn't care. He just needed to see her. As soon as he reached the middle of the back yard he looked around. He turned to his left and stopped dead in his tracks. It was her… it was his Marissa. He only saw her back, but he recognized that frame and the way it stood there, the gorgeous golden hair and the way that it flowed down her back, and just her presence from anywhere. He hadn't realized just how much he longed for this moment until now.

Everything else seemed to fade from his view. Marissa was his focus, and he couldn't wait to see the rest of her, hear her voice, and hold her in his arms. She was too far away for him to speak and be audible, so he took a few more steps forward. The smile on his face was similar to that of a little boy on his birthday. But the closer he grew to her, he realized that she wasn't alone. Suddenly a pair or strong hands snaked around the small of her back, and Ryan stopped immediately in his step, his smile immediately vanishing from his face.

He wasn't expecting this, that was for sure. He felt like he was being a bit intruding and meddlesome as he watched Marissa lean forward and meet her luscious lips with the stranger's own. He shouldn't be watching this, he told himself, it was none of his business. But just like an onlooker during a horrific car accident, it was impossible not to scrutinize. He stood there just staring as Marissa pulled back slightly and giggled. The same giggle she used to get when Ryan would kiss her or tease her. Immediately he could feel his heart begin to break. The couple was obviously very into each other, and Ryan began to feel sick to his stomach. He had pondered this happening before. He couldn't expect Marissa to still be single and waiting for him to come and save her after all this time. He wasn't even sure what she remembered of him. But seeing it for real was completely different. And of course there was Isabella, but right now he honestly wasn't thinking of that. His selfish emotions were taking over, and he was fighting desperately to not go and tear her away from whoever this guy was.

He reached up and rubbed the back of his neck, still completely unaware of anything else going on around him. He suddenly felt like he really shouldn't be there. Like coming to Italy was a huge mistake. He considered just turning around and getting back on a plane and pretending as if none of this ever happened. He wished for his feet to just pick up and go, but they seemed to be cemented there. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't walk away. Instead, he shut his eyes, he couldn't watch this anymore. But even with his eyes closed he could still see the way the guy ran his hands all down her back. He shook his head, trying to get the images out of his head. But the more he hoped, the more vivid they became.

Ryan looked again, the setting around him was suddenly dark, with only small lights illuminating his vision. But there seemed to be a spot light on the couple in front of him. They turned just right and Ryan could now see the silhouette of the guy man-handling Marissa. He had a buzzed head, and strong arms, and Ryan could feel his stomach churn again. He looked around for an escape, but although he was in an open yard, there seemed to be no where to hide. As he brought his attention back to them, they finally pulled away. As Marissa leaned to the right she revealed the face of the man behind her.

Ryan blinked and shook his head. It couldn't be him. He shook his head and looked again. Now his breathing had come to a halt as well, hoping that what he saw was just an oversight. But as he looked this time there was no mistaking who it was. He felt his hand ball up into a fist and he spoke just one word, and one word only. "Volchok." But the couple didn't hear him at all, his voice must have been too soft. Instead of turning to see Ryan finally coming towards them, Kevin Volchok grabbed a hold of Marissa by her hips and pulled her body into his with a thrust of his own pelvis. Their lips crashed together again and Ryan was forced to watch as he ran his hands all down her body, and their tongues danced playfully with each other. It was a kiss full of passion and desire, and Ryan knew that he could no longer hold back.

"Get away from her!" He demanded and pulled a shocked and bewildered Marissa away from someone Ryan felt nothing but pure hated for. It felt good to finally act on something he should have acted on years ago. Before he knew what was going on, they were struggling together on the ground, wrestling and tumbling until finally Ryan was on top of him, and all his pent of frustration for the past three years was coming out. He could feel his fist punch against the face of his nemesis harder than he had ever punched before, but sensed no pain of his own. Ryan grunted as he used all of his body weight and strength to hurt him… no to kill him, because that is what he truly wanted to do. Ryan had never felt so much anger in his entire life. The closest thing to it was Trey, but this surpassed those feelings by far.

_Punch._ He hit him again and again, but it seemed no matter how many times he struck him, the smile on Volchok's face didn't fade away. This only made Ryan more fueled. Blood was literally flying from his face, or maybe it was Ryan's fists, it was hard to tell at this point. But the more he hit him, the louder his laugh grew.

"Ryan… Ryan." A voice was telling him to stop, but he didn't listen. At first he wasn't sure who's voice it was, but the more he pleaded, he knew it was coming from Seth. "Ryan, you are embarrassing me!" Seth pleaded, but Ryan continued to pummel him.

He blinked his eyes, and the voice got louder… He didn't know what happened, perhaps he was becoming delusional and just hit anything in sight, because now it was no longer Volchok underneath Ryan, but a very scared and frantic looking Seth. He was struggling and wailing his arms all around, and just as Ryan was about to take another swing he stopped and blinked. "Seth?"

"Yeah, Ryan wake up buddy! You are having a nightmare, and freaking everyone out." Ryan's eyes fluttered open, to see Seth trying to hold Ryan down in his seat. He looked around silently and instead of seeing the yard, Marissa or Volchok, he saw a dozen or so eyes staring at him. Soon he realized that he was still on the plane, and had fallen asleep. He was dreaming…. No he was having a horrible nightmare. He reached up to wipe his forehead and could feel the sweat falling from it freely.

"Seth, where are we?" Ryan asked, completely confused. The dream had been so vivid, he could have sworn it was real. He tried to avoid all the stares coming from the seats surrounding him. He looked to Seth, and Seth actually looked kind of scared.

"Dude, you were tossing and turning, and swinging, I thought you were having a seizure or something." Seth started to mimic what he looked like and Ryan's face grew even redder than it already was.

"Stop it Seth, I get the point." He used his hand to stop one of Seth's own from hitting him. "I… I must have been dreaming." He admitted in a whisper, completely embarrassed by what had just happened. He had lost complete control, and was scared of if that had really happened. But the more the thought about it, there was no way Volchok could be in Italy, he had turned himself in and was locked away in jail. Still it was so completely lucid, that it was hard not to believe that it was reality. He shook his head.

"I'd say. I thought you were going to kill me." Seth tried to straighteb his clothes, he too was a bit disheveled by trying to calm Ryan down. "What were you dreaming about anyway?"

"Nothing." Ryan answered too quickly and shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it."

Seth looked to him and raised a brow. Ryan had to know that he wasn't going to just settle for that. Since when did Seth not probe and probe until he got what he wanted to find out. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could Ryan spoke, "Drop it Seth."

Seth made a face and shook his head. "You have no idea what I was just going to say." He protested. And although it was obvious to both parties where the conversation was about to go, Seth had to act like Ryan was wrong. "I was just going to say, look we are descending, we are almost in Rome!"

Ryan turned his attention to the window and looked as the plane moved in and out of afternoon clouds. Every once in awhile he would be able to catch glimpses of the land beneath them. Suddenly his stomach muscles tightened. This was it, he was going to see her.

"Are you ready?" Seth asked Ryan as he continued to look out the window.

Ryan wasn't sure what to say. "I don't know," he admitted.

Before they knew it, the plane had landed and they were anxiously waiting their turn to get their carry on luggage and exit the plane. By the time it took them to actually land the plane and get out, Ryan had time to regain his composure, and was already starting to feel excited again. He really didn't know what to expect when he finally saw her, but he was eager nonetheless. He knew in his head that what he saw in his dream couldn't possibly be real, but he was having a hard time truly convincing himself of this. The precision of his visions and the way he felt when he say them had truly shook him up.

He was silent as he and Seth made their way down the ramp and through the airport. He looked around, taking in all the surroundings. It wasn't that different than any other airport he had been in, except for the fact that the signs were in a foreign language. Seth was busily checking his voice mail messages and walking and talking as if he were actually talking to someone live on the other end of the phone.

"Summer, I would never ignore you sweetykins." He smiled and just before they turned to find the baggage claim, he stopped dead in his tracks once more. "Oh no."

Ryan was annoyed, and Seth's delay in movement only agitated him more. He wanted to just get there already. "What is it Seth?" He asked and turned to watch his lanky friend with his mouth open and cell glued to his ear.

"That was Summer," he informed him. "All seven times." He made a face and flipped his cell phone shut. "She called my mom."

This had finally caught Ryan's attention, and his blue eyes grew wide. "Does she know we are here?"

"You're damn straight I know!" Summer seemed to have appeared out of no where like the invisible woman. She stood up behind Seth and swatted him hard with the front side of her hand. "Cohen, you idiot, what are you doing here?"

Ryan had a hard time holding in his laughter as he watched a very angry Summer start to rage black out on her boyfriend. Ryan was so enthralled by the scene before him that he hadn't even noticed that Summer wasn't alone.

"Summer, the love of my life, the woman who will one day bare my children, if you'd just let me explain…" Seth tried to talk his way out of it between hits, kicks and yells. But there was no use, Summer was beyond mad at Seth for even attempting to meddle with her 'perfect plan', and she was bound to let him know just how mad with the her fists.

"What if you came and you ruined things for us?!" She screamed and swatted him again. They were causing quite a scene in the middle of the airport, and Italians, Americans and all other foreigners alike were laughing and pointing.

Ryan shook his head, and was about to step in to say something when suddenly Summer turned on him with eyes of fury. Her normally brown eyes were glazed over in fire red, and Ryan for a moment had to admit that he was pretty scared. "Summer, Seth and I just wanted to…"

"Wanted to ruin everything!" Summer screamed, her aggression not even close to dying down. Ryan blinked, completely unsure of how to react to her anger. He suddenly grew irritated himself. He knew that Summer was Marissa's best friend, but didn't she understand what this meant to him, what SHE meant to him?

"That's not it at all." Ryan tried to remain calm. He had never hit a girl before, but for a moment he almost felt like he could if Summer kept this up. Seth was in the background practically whimpering, and Ryan opened his mouth to speak again…

"She is here Ryan…" Summer spoke softly, the rage from her eyes dying down slightly.

Ryan blinked. What did she mean that she was there? Surely she didn't mean… He turned around to where Summer's gaze had directed him, and he froze. There she was. Her head was down, unwilling to meet his stare, but he would recognize that body anywhere. It was gorgeous, just the way he had remembered it. Every curve was so perfect, she hadn't changed a bit. Ryan smiled and took a step forward. He hesitated for a moment, and then spoke one word and one word only: "Marissa."

Just as he took another step forward, Marissa looked up and met Ryan's eyes. But when Ryan could finally see her face, he was shocked by what was before him. It wasn't the same angelic face he had once remembered. Her eyes were still the same green-blue they always were, but they seemed unfocused and lost. His eyes moved past her orbs and immediately fell upon the large scar that ran from the upper right side of her forehead and down, diagonally across her face, leaving her disfigured for life. Ryan stopped, and continued to stare. Was this really her? He spoke again, but this time in question, "Marissa?"

Marissa stood her ground, her face completely void of any emotion. It seemed she was a mirage in front of him instead of a live being. Summer's rants and Seth's whimpers could vaguely be heard in the background, but Ryan's pure focus was on her. He took another stop forward, and could feel the tears welling up behind his eyes. She was scarred, she was truly scarred. Ryan couldn't believe his eyes, she looked so hurt, and it ripped him apart inside. He continued to look over the rest of her face, and now noticed other white marks from where her face once bled. Where did they come from? He didn't remember them from the accident, but maybe he hadn't noticed, maybe he was too distracted. The lesions upon her face, he knew were merely a small visible fraction of the physical side of her pain. He knew that inside it had to be much worse. Why had he let her alone for so long? What had he done?

There were no other words to he could think of to say. Ryan didn't know what to do, and so he went with his initial gut reaction. His hand slowly reached up to touch the side of her milky face. He had wanted to touch her and comfort her for so long. But before the skin to skin contact could be made, Marissa jumped back with a gasp. "Who are you?" She demanded to know.

Ryan looked at her, completely flabbergasted. But she had remembered Summer, why didn't she know who he was? He blinked and shook his head. "Marissa, I'm Ryan."

Marissa shook her head and opened her mouth. But the only thing that came out of it was a laugh so unlike her own, Ryan couldn't believe that it had actually come from her. "Marissa, it's me, didn't Summer tell you?"

There was more laughter, and Ryan looked around quickly. It didn't sound like her voice at all. But when he looked around the airport was now completely empty. He started to panic, if he could only get Summer to explain, and yet Summer was no where to be found. Ryan looked to Marissa, and tears started to run down her face. But unlike clear tears that normally came from a human's eyes, Marissa seemed to be crying … blood. Ryan could feel his heart start to race. He reached out for her again, but she seemed to be too far from him to reach.

Marissa continued to laugh, and mock him with a roll of the eyes. She went from crying to laughing, and Ryan didn't understand what was going on. Suddenly she spoke again, "We've landed buddy, it's time to get up."

Ryan shook his head. "What?!" It didn't make sense at all, and he was confused beyond belief. "Marissa, you are bleeding, I need to go get help." Instead of responding this time, Marissa simply shook her head. "Marissa." He spoke again, but he still couldn't reach her, no matter how hard he tried she was still too far away.

Ryan fell to the ground on his hands and knees. He was exhausted and shaking, he just needed to get to her, but he couldn't. "Marissa!"

"Ryan get up, the hot flight attendant is going to think you have gone mad." The words came from Marissa's mouth, but he definitely recognized the voice now. It was Seth's. Suddenly his eyes fluttered open and Seth was hovering over him trying to wake him up again.

"Finally! You've been sleeping the entire trip. Do you know how many of those second rate movie's I had to sit through by myself? I mean they are ones that have already been in the theatre. If I would have wanted to see them already I would have. Moses only knows how bored I've been lately. I have definitely had time for lots of Seth/Movie time…"

"Seth!" Ryan interrupted and looked around. The plane had in fact landed, and almost everyone had gathered up their luggage and were exiting into the airport. Was this real this time? Or was his mind still playing tricks on him? He had a dream about having a dream. He was so confused. He squinted his eyes, causing a few creases to crinkle in his forehead. "Is this real? Are we in Rome?"

This finally shut Seth up and he laughed a bit uncomfortably. "How many sleeping pills did you take man? I know you are scared of heights and all, but didn't you read the back of the bottle? You have to be careful with how many you take. One time when Summer was going through finals and I had a deadline for Atomic Comic I couldn't meet the doctor prescribed these… OUCH!" Seth screamed when Ryan pushed him out of the seat and into the aisle. "My legs are still asleep, you have to give them a few minutes to wake up after such a long journey. " He complained after he almost fell on his face, and stumbled to regain his composure.

This was real, Ryan was sure of it. Seth's rambles were too real to be just a dream. He reached up to pull his and Seth's carry on luggage out of the over head compartment and spoke to Seth. "Let's go Seth." He began walking down the aisle, carrying both bags and paused before he reached the doorway. "Check your voicemail."

Seth ran to catch up to Ryan. He really had no idea what was going on, but without thinking he nodded and did as he instructed. "Right, I'm sure Mom left us instructions on which hotel she booked for us…" he continued to ramble as he turned on his phone and started listening to all the angry voice mails he got from Summer.

The boys continued to walk down the long passageway and into the busy Roman airport. Seth laughed a bit, trying to hold back his fear and trying not to let Ryan know. "Whoa, she is really mad."

"Who's mad?" Ryan asked, but some how he already knew the answer to his own question. His dream was coming real… almost.

"Summer." He said and flipped his phone shut. "I guess she got a hold of…"

"Kirsten?" Ryan answered for him and got on the escalator down towards the baggage claim.

"No, Isabella." Seth made a slight face, thinking that Ryan would definitely freak out once he heard that Isabella had told Summer they were coming. They both were quiet for a few seconds, letting it sink in what was going on. But to his surprise, Ryan remained calm and just nodded. Seth paused a bit, not positive on if he should continue or not.

"It's ok." Ryan half lied. He was still getting used to the idea that Isabella knew about just about everything. He took a deep breath and asked his question. "Is Summer going to meet us here?" They stepped off the escalator and began looking at the different belts figuring out where their luggage would disperse from.

"I should have just left your sorry asses to find your own way around like I had to." Just like his dream, Summer had appeared out of no where.

"How does she do that?" Ryan turned to Seth with a puzzled look.

"My woman is full of tricks." Seth smiled and turned to embrace his girlfriend. "I've missed you sooo much Summer-poo." The two brunettes embraced one another and pulled back and began making kissy faces.

Ryan made a face and shook his head. That truly was disgusting. He used this as a cue to start looking around to make sure that Summer was alone. He was nervous, what if his dream, either of his dreams were real?

"I missed you too, ass." Summer kissed him, but then pulled away and swatted him hard upside the head. "I told you to stay home!" She hit him again. It was amazing how she could go from full on affection to complete anger. Then again, maybe with Summer it was one in the same. Ryan laughed and Seth barked out another 'ow!' The two began to bicker just like they hadn't been apart for weeks and Ryan continued to look around.

"You could have ruined the plan," Summer continued. "What if you would have come, and I didn't know it, and we were having a break through with Marissa?"

Seth remained silent, unsure of what to say, he hadn't thought that far in advance. His main concern was getting Ryan on the plane. Then he spent the last twelve hours watching mind numbing movies and playing his PSP.

"So she isn't with you?" Ryan asked, continuing to look around, and then seeing their luggage almost go by them. He quickly snagged both bags up and looked back to Summer to see her reaction.

She took a deep breath and sighed. "No, I haven't seen her in hours, she's with Marcello." Seth opened his mouth to speak but Summer continued before he could get a word in edgewise. "It's been a long night for everyone." She looked to Seth and rolled her eyes when she saw him nodding his head. "Unlike some of us, I haven't been playing video games on the plane for the last twelve hours." She called Seth on his excuses before he could even speak them. I've been up all night waiting to hear from her. I'm sure it will happen soon, but when Isabella told me you were coming, I had to come get you to make sure you didn't ruin anything." She took a moment just to catch her breath and finished. "We haven't gotten the chance to talk yet, but she knows I'm here… I'll catch you up on the drive to the hotel." Summer reached out to help Ryan with the luggage, shoving her purse to Seth to hold as they began walking.

"How much does she remember?" Ryan inquired, dying to know more about the situation.

"I don't know exactly, but we'll find out soon enough."

Marcello and Marissa were walking up the entrance way to Summer's hotel and he could not stop raving about the way Marissa stood up to her mother. "If only Bella could have seen you Marissa, she would have been so proud."

Marcello was still damp from his fall in the pool, and Marissa hadn't straightened herself out at all, so as they walked into the ritzy hotel heads definitely turned to look at them. But Marissa was oblivious to the world and all the attention they were receiving. The easy part was over. Standing up to her mother seemed almost natural to her, and not quite as hard as she thought it would be. But now she knew she had to talk to Summer, and she just wasn't sure she was prepared to hear all of the truth yet. It was one thing to know she had been fed lies all this time, it was another to actually find out which ones were.

"I just hope I didn't get you in trouble with Joseppi." Marissa began as they entered the lift to go to Summer's room. Marissa's heart was beating fast, she was excited and extremely nervous with what was next to come.

"Eh whatev." Marcello smiled at the American lingo he had picked up from the show the Valley. "I'm too good of a server for him to fire me." He pressed the '7' button and the doors closed. "There would surely be an outrage if he tried." He smiled, suddenly incredibly confident in his role in things.

Marissa just smiled. Marcello's enthusiasm was pretty contagious, but she was still very apprehensive about talking with Summer. She knew she wanted to do it; she had to do it. She was just scared and overwhelmed. She had a grand mixture of emotions. She felt liberated and free after standing up to her mother. But things were still so uncertain that she just felt anxious.

"Do you think that Summer will be here?" Marissa asked as the doors opened and they stepped out onto the floor.

"Are you kidding? She has been calling me non-stop! She has been dying to see you and actually talk with you." Marcello quickly moved down the hall and got out the key from his soaked wallet that Summer had gotten for him a few days ago. He made a face and shook his head. "I hope this still works." He slid the key down the slot provided to unlock the door and held his breath.

Marissa waited and looked up and down the hall, feeling as if they were doing something wrong. Was she really ready for this? 'Yes' she told herself; she couldn't wait. Finally after a few tries the little light on the door went from red to green and Marcello smiled.

"Dopo voi!" He held the door open for Marissa and practically jumped up and down with excitement. Once she was inside he followed and shut the door behind them. "Bella, we've arrived!" He called out quickly.

But as Marissa timidly entered the room, she was almost thankful to see that no one was in it. "I don't think she is here." Marissa spoke, still unsure of if this was a good thing or a bad.

"Nonsense, I know Bella wouldn't step out, she wouldn't want to have missed us. Bella!?" He called out again and walked around the suite heading into the bathroom.

"Maybe she is bathing." Marissa suggested.

But Marcello was already halfway into the room. "It's ok, she changes in front of me all of the time." He disappeared into the luxurious bathroom and Marissa couldn't help but giggle.

Moments later he returned with a solemn look upon his face. "Well, where the hell is she?"


	10. The Reunion

_**Chapter Ten: The Reunion **_

Marissa sat a bit uncomfortably on the bed as she watched a turbulent Marcello pace around the room with his cell phone glued to his ear. She felt really awkward sitting there in a room that wasn't her own, with another person who didn't inhabit it either. But then again this level of discomfort was becoming almost natural for her as of late. She watched as Marcello became more flustered and shut his cell phone once more. It had been about twenty minutes since they had been in the hotel, but it felt more like four hours.

"Oca! I don't understand where the hell she is or why in the world she isn't answering her phone!" Marcello looked down to Marissa. She was sitting on the plush king sized bed, but couldn't quite get comfortable on it. He saw how awkward she felt, and he knew that Summer's absence wasn't helping at all. He paced a bit more, and wasn't sure what to say. Marissa finally agreed to speak with Summer, and in return she was no where to be found. This was poignant and frustrating.

He opened his mouth to speak again, but still was unsure of what to say. What was his problem? He never was at a loss for words. Marissa looked up with her lost, sad blue-green eyes and shrugged her shoulders. She didn't know what to say either. "I'm going to call her again." Marcello informed her and flipped his cell phone open once more.

Marissa nodded, she was glad that he wasn't going to try to speak to her, because after the last day and a half, she wasn't sure she could think of any other sentences to formulate. It took a lot out of her to face her Mom and Bray, and she was depleted. Besides, she was already nervous about seeing Summer as it was, and the fact that she wasn't there only made her doubts flare up more. Something deep inside her had told her that her mother wasn't being completely honest with her for a while now, but could she trust someone she hadn't spoken to in years either? Marissa looked up and met eyes quickly with Marcello. He looked really nervous, and she felt sad for him. She knew he was only trying to help, but his anxious demeanor was making her feel less and less like she should be there.

The phone once again kicked to voice mail and Marcello went on another rampage, "Bella, where they hell are you?! Marissa is here, as in, IN your hotel room. But YOU aren't here? What is wrong with this picture? Get here now." With that he shut his phone again and plopped down on the bed next to Marissa. "I'm sorry Marissa, I don't know where she is…"

Stopped in mid sentence, Marcello and Marissa's attentions were drawn to the clutter and voices outside the door of the hotel room. "Cohen, would you stop, my key is not in my back pocket, it's in my purse."

"Gawd Summer, did you have to shove me? My bones aren't even done growing yet; if you break any of them they might not ever develop correctly. I mean you don't want to deprive me up the full strapping man I can be do you?"

"Can it Cohen, you were done growing years ago." The two in the room looked to each other with wide eyes and couldn't help but let out a little laugh. It was quite amusing to say the least, and really brand new to both of them..

"And you call yourself a Pre-Med major. It's a common fact that the average man continues to grow until he is 21 years of age, which means I still have a few months to go." Seth continued to ramble and Summer rolled her eyes. In the mean time Ryan took the key card from Summer's hand and shook his head. He hadn't been around the Seth/Summer banter in awhile, and the novelty was already wearing off.

Marissa and Marcello continued to giggle. But then suddenly something clicked in Marcello and he realized what was happening. Summer's boyfriend Seth had come to Italy. But the question is, why? Instantly he remembered Summer talking about how skittish Marissa was, and too many people might cause her to run away again. He stood up and pulled Marissa up to stand with him. "Hey, maybe we should leave, and wait for them to get settled." He spoke as quickly as he could. There were two entrances to the room, and he planned on taking her out towards the other direction. But before Marissa could protest the door flung open and first revealed one of the most amazingly good looking men, Marcello had ever seen. He stopped for a moment and gawked at him. He suddenly forgot where he was going.

Behind Ryan, the quarreling couple continued, "Cohen, if you get any taller, that only means you'll get lankier, and I'm not about to marry someone that looks like a scrawny orc! I'm already much shorter than you as it is, and if…"

"Summer, I'm so proud of you, you made a Lord of the Rings reference!" Seth looked at her and beamed. He moved in to wrap his arms around her, "My baby is learning…"

The two were lost in their Coheny world and in the mean time Ryan had finally been given the chance to lay his soft blue eyes upon her. He was taken back, because he hadn't expected to see her standing there. And to him, it felt like the world had stopped turning, and the voices of his two best friends had faded from his mind almost at once. He willed himself to move forward and greet her by wrapping his arms around her small frame, but it felt like his feet were bound to the carpet below him. It was a battle between his head and his heart, and at the moment he had no idea which would triumph.

Instead of moving, he stood there, and an awkward silence formed between the two that once were so close. She looked even better than he had remembered. Not even her goddess-like appearance in his dreams could do her true justice. The real thing was better than his memories could ever come up with. She was beyond beautiful, and any doubts that Ryan had possibly had about coming vanished instantly. A small, content smile formed on the edge of his lips and in his eyes as he looked at her entire form. Finally, after what seemed like a year he reminded himself to breathe as he spoke just one word, "Hey."

Marissa was standing next to Marcello, but due to the circumstances before her, she wouldn't have known it. Everything else seemed dull and her eyes fell immediately into Ryan's. Something was definitely familiar about those eyes and suddenly she felt her stomach do flip flops. Was she remembering something? She stayed silent, studying his defined features slightly, then getting trapped into those eyes again. She didn't know what to say, or how to greet him. For all she knew, her last encounter with him was in Tijuana. "Hey," she responded, and tried hard not to blink. The gaze she was in, felt amazing, and she didn't want it to end. There was something so comforting about him, that she just couldn't explain. She was intrigued and knew that this feeling was something she didn't want to go away.

About mid stare, Marissa blinked, losing the trance they had between them and Marissa's mind wandered to a real memory that seemed so vivid…

_It was completely dark outside, and Marissa was waiting at the end of her driveway for Luke. They were off to some party yet again and Marissa was wearing her favorite pair of low rise blue jeans and her new white designer tank top that showed just the slightest bit of mid driff. She was texting away on her cell phone to Summer when she heard the click of a lighter and looked up. Her eyes widened and immediately she knew he wasn't from around here; his attire alone told her that. He was wearing black jeans, a simple white t-shirt, a grey hoody and a black leather jacket. He was straight out of a James Dean movie, with a simple leather chocker to top it off. She half smiled and watched as he noticed her as well, cigarette unlit. ._

"_Who are you?" She asked bluntly, she was used to getting what she wanted, and let's face it he was practically in her back yard anyway, so she had no problem asking in the way that she did.. _

_With his cigarette still in his mouth and unlit, Ryan responded, "Whoever you want me to be."_

_Marissa became instantly amused and smirked. "Okay."_

_Their gaze never left one another, and Ryan continued to study her as he finally lit his cigarette. Marissa broke the stare only to look at her house behind her, to make sure no one was watching._

"_Hey, can I bum a cigarette?" She smiled again and waited for him to respond. Marissa wanted to know more, and it was the only way she could think of to interact for now._

_Ryan raised a brow and walked over to her. He gave her a cigarette and then instead of offering his lighter he offered his lit cigarette instead. Marissa hesitated only for a moment before leaning in close, taking a drag off her cigarette to light it against his own. She could have sworn she saw a spark. She smiled once it was lit, and backed away to where she was standing before._

"_So what are you doing here, seriously?"_

"_Seriously?" Ryan started and then took another drag off his cigarette before walking towards her. Speaking in a raspy, quiet voice he continued. "I stole a car. Crashed it. Actually my brother did. Since he had a gun and drugs on him, he's in jail. I got out and my Mom threw me out. She was pis sed off and drunk, so Mr. Cohen took me in."_

_Marissa took it all in and smiled. "You're their cousin from Boston, right?"_

_Ryan smirked himself, "Right."_

"Coop!" Suddenly both Ryan and Marissa were snapped out of their gaze as Summer realized what was going on. She instinctively pushed Ryan a bit out of the way to let her petite yet vicious body pass by. Unlike Ryan she didn't hesitate to immediately fall forward and wrap her arms around her best friend. "Oh my gawd Coop, I am so glad you are finally here."

As Summer hugged her, Marissa took a moment to let it sink it what was happening. She hesitated at first, because she hadn't hugged anyone like this in what felt like a lifetime. But as she could feel the genuine warmth coming from Summer's body and embrace, she finally exhaled and wrapped her own long arms around her friend and hugged her back.

As the two young women enfolded into each other, the rest of the room stood still. Ryan and Seth seemed to be holding their breath, and Marcello could feel his eyes start to swell up with tears. It was quiet, and not even Seth was brave enough to speak for fear on ruining this moment for his girlfriend.

Although Marissa's eyes had closed as soon as she felt comfortable enough to hug Summer back, Ryan's eyes remained glued to her. He ran his vision up and down her body. Perhaps he was looking for the bruises and cuts he had scene in his last dream, or maybe he was just taking it all in that it was really her. It didn't matter, all he knew was that he was there, and she was ok. Or at least she seemed to be.

After a few moments, Marissa started to get a little uncomfortable. It was a bit much for her and so she started to pull back a bit. However, Summer wasn't quite ready to let her go yet and just held tighter. Marissa's eyes fluttered open, and a genuine smile fell upon her lips. Forced to still be in the embrace she turned her head and looked at Ryan. Their eyes met once more and she felt her body get goose bumps, despite the fact of being so close to Summer. Why was she feeling this way? After a moment longer, Marissa had to break from his gaze again, it was too intense. And at that time she noticed that not only was he staring at her, but so were Marcello and Seth.

"Gawd Coop, I had forgotten how freakishly tall you are." Summer stepped down from being on her tip toes and smiled into her friend's eyes. "I need a step stool just to properly hug you!" She giggled and straightened out her clothes. She was ecstatic that her best friend had finally come around and came to talk to her. Her mind was going around in circles like crazy as she decided what should happen next. But then she just shook her head. She was there, finally. She then took her time to look her best friend up and down, studying every aspect to her. After some consideration she asks, "Have you lost weight?" She looked pretty concerned as her hands found her way to her hips accusingly; Marissa was skinny enough as it was.

Marissa wasn't sure what to say. She shrugged and suddenly felt like she was the main attraction at a freak show. She subconsciously found her long arms trying to cover up her slender body and looked away. "I don't know, I … "

"She's freakin' gorgeous!" Marcello interrupted and moved over to the girls with dazzling eyes. He placed one hand on either of them and pulled them into an awkward group hug. "I wouldn't change a thing; willowy will never go out," stated the extremely skinny gay man.

And for the first time, Ryan and Seth's attention was no longer on the girls, but on the stranger in the room. Without words they looked at each other, Ryan raising a brow and Seth mouthing the word, 'willowy?' They both shrugged at one another and then turned back to the trio in the middle of the room. Who was this guy, and what was he doing here?

"Bella, I'm so happy for both of you!" Marcello continued to speak in his thick Italian accent. He moved to hug just the brunette and then leaned back and swatted her in the shoulder. "Why the hell were you not answering your phone? We were going crazy here!"

Seth's eyes grew wide. Who did this guy think he was, hitting his girlfriend? "Ryan did you see that?" He pointed a bit exasperated. He wasn't really alarmed by the way he used physical expressions to get Summer's attention, but more jealous of the banter they obviously seemed to have.

Ryan was too busy trying to figure out who Marcello was to really pay attention to Seth. Maybe his first dream was on the right track; maybe Marcello was Marissa's boyfriend. "See what Seth?" He said quietly and quickly. Immediately he regretted encouraging his brother to elaborate.

"He hit her!" He said with a mock shock in his voice. "Normally I know it's my job to stand up for my lady love, but don't you think this is normally your kind of thing?" He looked to Ryan with an expectant look in his eyes, hoping that he would be the one to break up the affection in the room. "You have more practice, you know with the whole physical thing… no, not the horizontal tango, we all know that I have experience in that now too, but I mean with the whole hitting, shoving thing. Maybe you could just give him a glare."

Ryan did in fact form a glare in his blue eyes, but it was not directed towards the Italian man, instead he looked at his brother and shook his head. No words were needed, Seth returned the look and frowned, knowing what his brother was thinking without him speaking it audibly. Ryan then turned his attention back to the others and took a step forward. He felt somewhat awkward being there, as if this wasn't his place. But he still wanted some of his questions answered.

Before he could speak, Summer had looked over Marcello's shoulder and saw Ryan approaching them and moved towards him to cut him off. "Ryan…" she began, suddenly thinking of what would be best to say and do. She wasn't expecting for everyone to meet like this, and so she really had to think on her toes. "This is my friend, Marcello."

The word 'friend' rang in Ryan's ears. Surely if he was more to Marissa, Summer would have been smart enough to inform him now. Suddenly he felt the tightness in his chest relax; a tightness he hadn't even realized had formed until it had released. He smiled and extended his hand. "Hey man, I'm Ryan." The two of them shook hands and Summer beamed.

Marissa took a step back and watched as all the introductions were being made. This was not what she had expected; all she wanted was to talk to her best friend and learn the truth of her past. But she remained patient and quiet.

"And this is Cohen." Summer moved over to Seth and placed her hands on his chest with a smile.

Seth stepped forward, standing tall and trying to stick out his next to non existent chest. "Seth Cohen, Summer's boyfriend, Cohen." He added on and reached out to shake his hand just as Ryan had done. Once contact was made, Seth and Marcello locked eyes and began to size each other up. They were next to the same height and so it was easy to just gawk at one another.

Finally Marcello broke the staring competition and smiled. "It's nice to meet both of you." They continued to watch each other and it wasn't until Summer pushed through and broke their contact that the two boys looked elsewhere.

Although Summer was busy making introductions, her main focus remained on Marissa. She observed her as she watched as everyone did their meet and greets. She was sheepish and quiet, unlike the Marissa she once new. Suddenly she realized that all these people in the same room were probably making her more nervous than she ought to be. She had to do something quick.

"Well boys, Coop and I have a lot of catching up to do, so maybe you should go get settled into your own room, and we can all catch up once you have overcome your jet lag." She moved towards Seth first, placing her hands on his chest and started to push him towards the door.

"What?! Summer, aren't I staying here with you? You don't honestly think that Ryan and I are going to share a room." Seth started to complain.

"We all know you have already walked in on him changing Cohen, so this will just be old habit." Summer continued to try to get the boys out the door, in the mean time turning to grab Ryan by the arm and dragging him along with her.

"That is something I'd like to see." Marcello piped in with a grin, thinking of walking in on either of the two boys changing, preferably together. He grinned and moved over to the bed and plopped down on it, not even considering the fact that Summer was going to kick him out too.

Marissa watched the scene before her, hoping that she would feel some sort of sense of familiarity with the interactions, but to her dismay all of this was brand new to her. She moved over to Marcello and sat down next to him on the bed.

"Summer, that is not true… ok maybe that one time, but it was a mistake and it was like six years ago!" Seth protested, trying to stay in the room. He wanted to be a part of whatever was going to happen as well. "Ryan, tell her we are staying. It would be more natural for Ryan to bunk up with Marissa anyway, and who cares where that other guy sleeps."

Marcello's mouth dropped open and he acted offended by placing a hand to his chest. "What?!"

As soon as the words escaped Seth's mouth, everyone in the room regretted it. Ryan immediately looked to Marissa, who had already briefly caught his eye but then immediately started to blush and looked down, playing with the hem of her shirt. "Seth, come on." Ryan said in a quiet voice. He understood what Summer was trying to do. And as much as Ryan wanted to be there with them, he knew that they had to take things slow. A lot of things had definitely changed because there was a time not too long ago when it would have been Ryan who was staying.

"Cohen, you are such an assface!" Summer reached out and swatted him hard, just as Marcello had done to her moments earlier. And of course Seth noticed it right away. He looked to Marcello and gave him a look that said, 'see, she is mine.'

Although he was pleased with her actions, he of course still had to complain. "Ow woman, not so hard, you already hit me there!" He rubbed his shoulder and looked down at her. By the look in her eyes he knew that he had to leave, but not without more protest. "Well why does he get to stay?" He looked up and nodded towards Marcello. Even Ryan paused for a moment so he could hear why he got to remain and not them.

Summer looked to Marcello, who had already made himself comfortable by sprawling out on the bed and then looked back to Seth and Ryan. She didn't have time to explain how Marcello fit into all this. If it wasn't for him, she might not be in the same room with Marissa right now anyway.

Apparently she took too long to come up with an answer, because Seth continued. "Have you been cheating on me, Summer Nicole Roberts?"

"What!? Gawd Cohen, no!" She rolled her eyes at the most ridiculous accusation she had ever heard. Then she heard laughter coming from Marcello and she shot him a look that could castrate him.

"Seth, we are right across the hall..." Ryan began. He was the only one that had noticed that Marissa was standing up, looking a little skittish and uncomfortable.

Marissa was beginning to feel like an outsider. She knew that they were all there for her, but it was a little too much for her to handle right now. Besides they were arguing because of her, and that was the last thing she wanted. She hadn't slept a wink, and she was tired and so she decided to just end this for now. Reaching for her purse she stood up and without really making eye contact with anyone she began to speak. "Hey guys…"

Summer gasped and then turned towards her best friend. At the same time Marcello scrambled to get out of bed and reach Marissa. Both parties assumed Marissa was going to run just like the last time too much was going on.

"You guys need to go!" Summer demanded referring to Ryan and Seth. She then looked up to Marcello too. "Maybe you should go too, and I will stay with Marissa." She was panicking. She knew her Coop all too well, and the last thing she wanted was for her to run again.

"What? Why!?" Marcello demanded to know. He turned to Seth, and found he looked pleased by Summer's decision.

Ryan shook his head. He met eyes with Marissa again, and longed to just take her and hold her. There was so much going on, and all he wanted was to be there with her.

"Look, I'm not running ok?" It appeared the Cooper girl understood their fears. "I'm just tired. I've been up all night, and right now I should just sleep. I think… I think we could all use it."

"But you can't go back to Julie's! She won't let you go if you do." Marcello explained.

"No Coop, you can just stay here, I'll make the boys go, and you and I can have some serious needed bonding time."

Marissa looked around the room. Everyone was staring at her, and she was beginning to feel like she had right after the accident. So many doctor's observing her, she felt like a guinea pig.

"No." Marissa began. "You are already here Summer, and I don't want to oppose. I'll just go get a room to myself." She paused and searched through her purse. Pulling out a credit card she spoke, "I'll just use Julie's credit card." She tried her attempt at a little smirk. She had been so dependent and trusting of her mom the last three years, it was extremely new and refreshing for her to be on her own. And yet at the same time, it was incredibly frightening. But she was pushing through it, she wanted to do this, and she would.

Summer smiled at her best friend. She was proud of her. She wanted to insist that she stay with her, but she also knew that if she were going to do this right it had to be on Marissa's terms. "Ok Coop, why don't we go down stairs and see if you can get a room on this floor. Then we can all rest and once rejuvenated you and I will have a talk."

As Summer talked, she had linked arms with Marissa and headed out the door. Marissa took a deep breath, for the first time in a very long time, something felt natural to her. Having Summer by her side was all reassuring. They moved on, leaving the three boys behind staring at the girls before them as they left. Once the door shut out their vision they all looked to each other uncomfortably.

"I'm going to get some rest." Ryan began and headed for the room across the hall.

Marcello and Seth were the ones that remained. Seth crossed his arms, indicating he wasn't leaving. And Marcello looked around. "My stuff is already here."

Seth looked and noticed that along with Summer's things were Marcello's as well. "You may have won this round…." Seth squinted his eyes in a menacing glare, "But I'll be back after my much needed rest, and ready for battle." With that Seth followed out the door in tow with Ryan, but not before looking back and attempting to give Marcello a death glare. The door closed and all Marcello was left to hear was Seth banging on the door for Ryan to let him in.

A couple hours later… although everyone was attempting to sleep by laying in their various own hotel beds, no one seemed to be having any real success. In a room all to herself, Marissa lay on the king sized bed, still in her clothes. She was on top of the covers just staring at the ceiling. She had pleaded with herself to shut her eyes and get some indisputable rest, she was after all exhausted. But her mind kept turning and turning. She was excited, and nervous and was just trying to make sense of everything by herself. She was failing miserably.

In a room across the hall, Summer and Marcello were both laying on their sides, back to back also still in their clothes and on top of the sheets. Both had thought the other was sleeping and stayed quiet out of respect to the other. But if they would have turned around they would realize that it was a lost cause for both of them as well.

And finally in a room across from Summer and Marcello's and adjacent to Marissa's, forming an invisible triangle in the hallway, two brothers lay in double beds with the lights off and the curtains drawn.

Ryan had actually been able to doze off for a bit here and there, despite his mind running wild. He had finally seen her, and it wasn't just a dream. He had more than enough going on in his head, but his will to lay in peace was actually winning out slightly.

Seth on the other hand, hadn't even tried to sleep. He was only laying in the darkness because Ryan had threatened him. The only way he conceded to let him in the room in the first place was if he just shut up and went straight to bed. Apparently Ryan didn't want to talk about his feelings; he didn't want to share how he felt about seeing Marissa for the first time in three years. Seth really shouldn't have been surprised because Ryan was never one to share anything. But in Seth's opinion if he wasn't going to talk, Seth should at least be able to.

His legs started jittering a bit in bed. It was as if being quiet this long was the worst punishment on this planet, and he couldn't take it any longer. He burst! "Do you realize that there is only one bed in Summer's room? ONE bed. That means that they are sleeping side by side right now, where I should be. And she tried to deny that there was something going on. Who is she kidding? You can't sleep in the same bed with the opposite sex and NOT have anything go on. Well maybe Mom and Dad can, I would like to think they really have only done the hanky panky once to conceive me. But for normal people, it has to be impossible."

It was dark, and so Seth couldn't see Ryan roll his eyes. Seth was surprised he didn't get any sort of reaction out of him. Not even a 'shut up Seth' or some kind of menacing threat. And so when the room remained quiet, he continued, "I know you are awake." Seth sat up, and faced Ryan in the darkness. "Seeing Marissa even threw me for a loop, so I can't imagine what its doing to you. It's like the first time Superman ran into Lana Lang after being in Metropolis…."

Still no response.

"Maybe you should go over there and try to talk to her. She is right next door ya know. Summer says she wants to talk to her first, but she is busy playing with her boy toy over there now isn't she? You should take advantage of the situation and go over there and…"

THUD.

Suddenly Seth felt something heavy and hard fly against his chest, causing instant pain. He yelped in anguish and fell back onto the bed. "Was that your shoe?" He coughed out.

Across the hall… neither Summer nor Marcello were yet to be sleeping. Although Marcello was up all night with Marissa, he was too excited to sleep. As for Summer, her brain was on overload on everything she wanted to say to Marissa once given the opportunity. After at least an hour of complete silence, both parties at the same time let out a long sigh.

Summer laughed and turned around so that she could face Marcello. At the same time Marcello giggled and twisted around towards as well. "I thought you were sleeping Bella, though I should have known better."

Summer groaned a bit and shook her head. "I'm trying to, but my brain is on frequency overload. My thoughts are banging around like I'm on some jacked up street drug like speed or something."

Marcello laughed and shook his head. "You mean like that episode where Cloud got addicted to caffeine pills?"

"Ewww. I'm so much hotter than Cloud."

"Of course you are. Besides what kind of name is Cloud anyway?" Marcello smiled and they both fell silent for a moment. "I hope I didn't cause problems between you and Seth. If you want I can get my own hotel room, or I guess I could sleep in my own apartment for a change."

"What and miss out on all this fun?" Summer smiled, to assure him that she wanted him there. "Don't worry about Cohen, I'm going to let him squirm a bit. But he'll find out sooner or later that you're gay. And until then he needs to learn to trust me."

Another silence fell between them showing they understood one another. They lay there thinking and remaining silent when their individual thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock at the door.

"I'll get it." Marcello informed her.

"It's probably Cohen with some kind of excuse that Ryan is snoring or something."

Marcello laughed and rolled out of bed and moved over to the door. As he opened it he smiled. "Marissa, did you sleep well?"

At the sound of Marissa's name, Summer shot out of the bed with excitement.

"Kind of." Marissa admitted and then looked up to Marcello with a soft smile. "Is Summer awake?"

Marcello pushed the door open further to let Marissa come into the room, showing that Summer indeed was awake and alert, and now sitting on the edge of the bed.

"We woke up a few minutes ago." Summer lied because it didn't matter to her that she hadn't gotten any sleep.

Once more a silence filled the room. Both Marissa and Marcello stood there awkwardly, and Summer searched for something to say. Marcello looked between the two girls and realized that as much as he wanted to be there, this was their time, and he needed to leave.

"I actually have a lot to do. I haven't been to my apartment in what seems like decades, my fish are probably all belly up." He shuffled his feet and moved over to Summer. "Why don't you call me later, and maybe we can all do dinner."

Summer looked up to him and mouthed the words 'thank you.' Marcello smiled and nodded, then leaned to kiss her on the cheek. He then stood up and moved to hug Marissa quickly. "I'll see you gorgeous ladies later." And with that, Marcello excited the room, shutting the door behind him.

And then there were two.

This was the moment Summer had been waiting so long for. She had thought about what she had wanted to say since the moment she decided she was going to come find her. So why was it that she was speechless now?

Marissa was still standing in the middle of the room. She tucked her long hair behind her ears and waited for Summer to speak. She didn't know how to react with her, because now she didn't know what the truth was of how their friendship had ended.

"Ok this is like an episode from on of Seth's ridiculously creepy sci-fi movies. It's weird and I don't like it." Summer laughed, using humor once more to break the ice. She quickly moved over on the bed, patting the spot next to her, indicating for Marissa to join her. "This shouldn't be weird, we are best friends!"

For a moment Marissa hesitated, but after seeing Summer's bright welcoming eyes, she smiled and moved over to the bed. "That's the problem, for the last three years I thought you were a skank ass whore who slept with my boyfriend, NOT my best friend." Marissa laughed, stating the obvious as she sat down.

Summer pretended to be offended, but then quickly chuckled along with Marissa. She had to note that Marissa's choice of words were definitely something she would had used as well. Perhaps they weren't as estranged as she had thought they were.

"Well if your Mom wanted to make up some story of me sleeping with some boyfriend of yours, she could have at least used a better name. Please like I would sleep with someone named Koby." Summer raised her brow and the two girls continued to laugh.

It felt good to laugh, and for the first time in three years Marissa felt more at home than ever. The girls continued with their chatting and light jokes, and Marissa finally realized how stupid she had been to ever believe that Summer would ever try to hurt her like that. She didn't even need proof, in her heart she knew that she was the best friend she could have ever asked for.

"So let me get this straight. There was never a Koby, and apart from Luke, the only guys I ever dated in high school were ones my mom disapproved of?" Marissa couldn't help but smile. "I always knew I had it in me."

"Well…" Summer began. They hadn't really gotten into any real details of Marissa's history, Summer knew she had to keep this light before diving into anything real. But at the same time if Marissa asked she didn't want to lie or hold any truth from her. Julie had done enough of that. Still, she would try and save all the drama about Ryan, Oliver, Trey & Volchok for later. They had so much to cover, and Summer knew that she was in for a long journey. Not only did they need to talk about the boy drama, but what about her father, and all the stuff with Caleb and getting kicked out of school and… and…. Summer shuddered at the thought, it wasn't going to be easy. But for now, she had to give her at least the stuff they could laugh about, to let her know what her life was really like sans the drama. And so she contined, "They weren't all guys." Summer met Marissa's eyes and waited for a response.

"Wait, what!?" Marissa let out a laugh, thinking Summer was completely joking. She leaned towards her, and pushed her playfully. "That's a good one Summ."

But when Summer didn't laugh or explain herself further, Marissa's eyes grew wide and she gasped. "Oh my gawd, I'm a lesbian?!"

Summer smiled and shook her head. "I wouldn't say that exactly. Alex was pretty brief; she didn't stand a chance against Ryan. I think she was just there for you, and at that time it's what you really needed. You know the whole, rebellion, living on your own, breaking all the molds type of thing. It's a good way to deal with drama. Not to mention you loved to pis s off Julie."

Marissa thought about everything Summer had said, and shook her head. It was kind of shocking, but only left her wanting to know more. This is exactly what she wanted, someone to tell her the truth. And despite what her Mom or doctor's thought, it was good therapy for her; it was not overbearing at all.

"I'm so glad you are here Summ." Marissa leaned over once more and embraced her petite friend. This time the hug had no hesitations or reservations. It was a true Cooper/Roberts squeeze.

"I'm glad you're glad Coop." Summer hugged her back, and the two remained in the embrace awhile longer.

"So tell me more! What kind of adventures did you and I get into? Did we throw the coooolest parties? Why did my mom and dad divorce? How in the world did you end up dating SETH COHEN!?" Marissa laughed and pulled back. The excitement in her eyes was enchanting and definitely contagious.

"And here I thought you would be more interested in your own love life." Summer laughed. To be honest, she wasn't even sure how she ended up with Seth Cohen, it just happened. She paused for a moment and started reminiscing in her head about her own dramas: The kissing booth twice, Seth's cowardly escape at the end of that first year, Zack, the comic book, the Brown debacle. They seemed faint compared to what Marissa had had to face, but real nonetheless. "I blame it all on Atwood." She finally concluded with a laugh. "If he would have never came to town to shake things up, I would have easily been married to some handsome and rich investment banker or something. "

Marissa made a face, and once more laughter filled the room. And then there was his name. Marissa had definitely wanted to know more about Ryan Atwood, the boy with the most potent gorgeous blue eyes she had ever remembered. All this time she had wondered why nothing had happened between them. And now she knew that something had. Summer had let it slip that they had dated, and her current memory was sharp. But how serious were they? She couldn't help but remember the way he looked at her just hours before. It was intense, and she couldn't help but think Summer was leaving a lot out juicy details.

"You don't want to know about that right now anyway. My and Cohen's tragic tale will come up sooner or later. Until then, there has to be some weird thought or memory you are dying to help me straighten out. What's most important to you? Ask away." Summer had no idea what she was getting into when she urged Marissa to ask questions.

Marissa opened her mouth to speak, but then closed it again. Did it really matter anyway what had happened between her and Ryan? Summer had done pretty good avoiding the topic up until now anyway. So there must be a reason for it. Either that, or maybe it wasn't as serious as she had thought… or hoped. And besides she had Bray now, so why did it matter. But that didn't explain why Ryan was there, and she wanted to know.

Summer waited for Marissa to speak, knowing she was trying to come up with the courage to ask her something huge. She braced herself for it, suddenly regretting her offer. She studied her friend carefully and noticed that her eyes continued to look up towards the door. _Ryan._ Summer thought. Even with no memory of the last three years, Marissa's thoughts were still focused on Ryan. She should have known.

"Ok Coop, I know what you are thinking." Summer sighed. "Yeah, you and Atwood were pretty intense for awhile." Summer started to explain to her. "But even before the accident…" She paused as she noticed Marissa flinch at the sound of the word accident. Summer hesitated and searched for more words to tell her. No they weren't officially together. But when were Ryan and Marissa ever truly NOT a couple?

Just as she began to explain something more there was a loud knock at the door.

Summer groaned lightly, knowing that knock just as well as she knew her boyfriends voice. She wasn't ready to give up her alone time with Marissa yet. She looked to her friend and smiled. "Just ignore it, he'll go away."

Marissa laughed and looked to the door. "How do you even know who it is?"

"I heard that Summer!" Seth whined and then knocked again.

Summer looked to Marissa, tilting her head to the side and shrugged as if to say, told you.

"Come on Summer, Ryan and I are starving, all we've had are those disgusting flight meals, they didn't even have pudding!"

Summer sighed. She knew she couldn't keep this up forever. She would get more alone time with Marissa later. Besides, she had to admit her stomach was growling too, she hadn't eaten anything since yesterday.

"I swear Cohen, if I didn't know Sandy and Kirsten, I would just assume you were raised in some sort of barn in the mid-west." She got up off of the bed and moved to open the door. As soon as she opened it, she noticed he was solo. "Where's Ryan?"

"Ignoring me." Seth said as he pushed his way through the room, expecting to see Marcello. "Marissa!" He smiled and moved over to hug her.

The look on Marissa's face was of shock, but she hugged him back and laughed. She realized that if Summer and Seth had dated for the last six years, obviously she and Seth had a friendship more than the mere silent neighbor relationship they had had before. "Hi Seth."

Summer turned around after closing the door again. She watched as Seth hugged Marissa. A small tear formed at the corner of her eye. This was real, it was happening. Instantly all of Summer's annoyance with Seth vanished.

"Coop, if we don't feed him, he just gets more and more strange." Summer laughed and moved to sit next to her again. Now, all three of them were sitting on the bed.

Seth couldn't be happier, and he showed it by bouncing up and down a bit on the mattress. 

Although all three parties had smiles upon their faces, the room felt a bit awkward again for some reason "Hey if you guys are hungry, I know all the best spots to eat." Marissa smiled and stood up with her purse.

"I knew Cosmo Girl was good for more than just vodka fire bolts and high fashion costumes!" Seth got off the bed and joined Marissa.

Marissa looked at him completely confused and looked to Summer for an explanation.

"Not important, I'll tell you later." She shook her head and stood as well. Seth opened his mouth to protest and Summer continued. "Cohen, go and get Ryan, I'll call Marcello and we'll all go grab some food."

Seth opened his mouth again, this time to protest about Marcello but Summer cut him off again. "Now Cohen."

A defeated Seth went across the hall and knocked on the door and Summer turned to face Marissa. "Are you sure you are up for going out?" She had to be sure before she dialed Marcello's number.

Marissa watched the banter, or abuse rather, between Seth and Summer and couldn't help but enjoy it. In fact, she couldn't wait to get more of it. "With all of you?" Marissa asked with a smile. "Definitely."

The next few hours were some of the most incredible moments of Marissa's life. At least from what she could remember anyway. Not only were Seth and Summer extremely entertaining, but throwing Marcello into the mix of things made them ridiculous. Marissa hadn't remembered laughing so hard in her entire life; she laughed so hard her stomach hurt. She was even brave enough to try some of her own jokes and taunts here and there. It felt good and natural, and to her surprise they had laughed at her in return. She smiled and couldn't help but know that deep down this is what it was supposed to be like. There was something about knowing she was surrounded by people who loved her, who wanted what was best for her, people she trusted.

Marissa had taken them to one of her favorite spots, which obviously didn't even come close to the likes of Joseppi's restaurant. In fact, she had told Summer that this was a place Julie would NEVER set foot in. It was just outside of Formello, the town where Marissa lived. A Ma & Pa type place, completely opposite of the trendy, touristy restaurants most would find in Rome. It was the type of place where they wouldn't think twice about taking four hours for dinner, making sure they were stocked plenty with bottles of great Italian Vino, and the help had no problem sitting down with the guests to chat and make sure they were happy. The restaurant had been around for years, and for good reason, along with the staff, the food was superb. It just wasn't fancy enough for Julie, or romantic enough for Bray. And yet it was just perfect for Marissa.

Because it was a small town, most of the people didn't speak English. It was fun listening to Seth, Summer and Ryan trying to communicate what they wanted to eat and drink. Seth would use gestures that seemed quite inappropriate, and Summer complained that everyone should be forced to learn English anyway. But to Marissa, Ryan was her favorite. He got quite embarrassed when the owner came out and asked him in Italian if everything was ok, and he had no idea how to respond. He turned slightly pink and mumbled a bit, and Marissa couldn't help but think how adorable it was. Marissa had learned enough of the language by now to get by, and when Marcello was done laughing at them he would act as interpreter. It was all quite amusing. Her favorite part of the evening was some where between the third and fourth course when Marcello 'outed' himself to everyone in Italian. Something about a Kingsley Six, Marissa could understand that much. By looking into Ryan's eyes he was sure he understood what Marcello was trying to say; only Seth was still left in the dark. Overall it was an amazing even. She had noticed that Ryan was quiet most of the time, but the few times he did speak Marissa surely listened.

Marissa was having the time of her life. She hadn't even noticed the missed calls she had on her cell phone. Not that she would care even if she did see them. Tonight was too perfect to ruin it with her drama. Sure there were a few awkward moments, where Marissa would ask a question about some inside joke the others had. They would look at her sadly and get all quiet and she realized she should already know the funny story. But someone would save the moment quickly, usually Marcello because he wouldn't know the account either. Marissa knew that there was so much she didn't know, but she also knew that this was the group to help her figure it all out.

Before they knew it, it was getting close to midnight. Summer had finally given in and told Seth that he could stay with her in her room. And so Marissa offered to let Marcello stay with her for the night. There was no need to have him drive all the way back to Rome at this hour she informed him. And so all five tired yet satisfied characters set off back to the hotel.

It was sometime in the middle of the night, or more like early morning and things seemed to finally be quiet. Seth and Summer were sound asleep in Summer's bed in their typical position. Seth was spooning Summer, holding her close into him as she nuzzled her back side up against them. His head fit perfectly into the crook of her neck, and they were both breathing rhythmically in time with one another. It seemed the only time they truly were at peace and not bickering was when they were dead to the world.

Across the hall, things weren't quite as serene. Marissa tried not to toss and turn too much, knowing that Marcello was fast asleep next to her, but it was getting difficult. She was restless, and even though she had managed to get about an hour or two of sleep, she had awoken from another nightmare. She was still tremendously tired, and she had just had a fantastic evening, but for some reason she still couldn't manage to stay asleep. Things were just so unsettling. When she was surrounded by her new-old friends things seemed to make sense. But once she was alone, her mind began to wander frantically again.

Finally she threw the sheet off of her that she had draped around her stomach and turned to look at the clock. 5:03 am. Perfect. She turned her head to see Marcello was still sleeping and got up. Looking around, she tried to decide what to do, seeing how sleep definitely wasn't an option. She couldn't bother Summer right now, and at this hour there weren't many places she could go. As a breeze blew her long blonde hair off her shoulder she turned towards the open door. She had forgotten that Marcello had opened the door to the balcony before they had went to bed. She had forgotten they had a balcony at all. She reached down and pulled the long sleeved t-shirt she was wearing earlier off of the nearby chair and placed it over her head. She had borrowed a pair of Summer's pajama's which were simply a pair of pink silk pants and a matching tank top. Though they fit her around the waste, the pants were more like capris on her, rather then the length they should be.

Clad in her silk pajamas and her blue shirt, she pushed open the door and stepped outside. It was a cool but clear early morning and the Roman streets below her were seemingly peaceful. The sun had not yet risen, but there was a soft glow indicating it soon would be. Up and off to her left, she could see a sliver of the Vatican's dome, and to her right and a few blocks away, she looked down and could vaguely see an older man sweeping the walk in front of his small café. She smiled and took a seat in a chair putting her legs up on the railing of the balcony. At this hour things did appear to be a bit more simple. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back, letting the breeze blow over her face.

In the room next door, Ryan abruptly shot up out of bed in a cold sweat, gasping for air like he had just come up from the bottom of a pool. At the same time, his eyes flew open and he found himself breathing heavily. His naked chest was covered with his own perspiration and he collapsed back onto the bed with a sigh. Nightmares. Again. He turned and reached for his watch that was laying on the bed stand and groaned softly when he saw that it was 5:04 am. Realizing how warm he was, he kicked off the bedding and rolled up into a sitting position hanging over the side of the bed, putting his head into his hands. Going back to bed was not an option, not right now. He would rather suffer and stay awake than to see the images he just saw flash through his mind again. Reaching over to grab his clothes, he stood up to dress himself. First his wife beater, then he put on his hoody. Then, he moved over towards the door and pushed it open. Instantly he felt the breeze cool his clammy skin, and he stepped out onto the balcony.

Marissa jumped a little as she heard the neighboring door slide open, letting out a little gasp as she did. Ryan heard her and turned quickly to find her sitting on the balcony, his balcony. Was he dreaming again? "Hey?" He spoke, looking from her, back to his door, and to her again.

"Hey." Marissa spoke timidly with a soft smile. There was an awkward moment at first as they tried to figure out what was going on, and then Marissa realized how they were at the same place. "Adjoining rooms." She nodded and smiled.

"Adjoining balcony." Ryan concluded and nodded back. As he looked at her again, he felt like he was intruding on something he shouldn't be. She looked so small and innocent sitting in the chair looking up to him. "I'm sorry, I'll let you…"

"No, its ok… stay." Marissa instructed him. She didn't want to be alone, and besides it was his balcony too. Without words Marissa stood up out of her chair and pushed it over towards Ryan a bit. She then moved over to the next chair and sat down, giving him a place to sit next to her.

Ryan hesitated. For some reason he felt like he shouldn't be doing this. He thought of Summer, and the disapproving look she would surely be giving him. But before he could even truly contemplate what was right or wrong he found himself sitting in the chair and half smiled. "Thanks."

Marissa just nodded at first. She brought her legs up into her chair, hugging her knees to her chest. After watching him sit down, she glanced out at the streets below them again. When she got enough courage to look at him once more, she glanced his way, and then met eyes. She laughed at how ridiculous they were acting. It was like they were fifteen years old. Obviously neither of them knew what to say, so Marissa took the initiative and attempted to start the conversation. "Why are you up so late?" She asked him softly.

Ryan had sat down, but tried carefully not to stare at her like he had done before. It wasn't until she asked him a question that he brought his full attention to her. "Couldn't sleep."

"Nightmares?" Marissa asked, resting her head upon her knees, continuing to look his way.

Ryan grew quiet. How did she know? Was it that obvious? He ran a hand through his short blonde hair and looked away for a moment.

When he didn't answer right away Marissa continued to speak. "Me too."

With her words, Ryan turned to face her once more. Their eyes met again, blue on blue and another understanding was produced. After a few moments the intensity of their stare grew more powerful. This time it was Marissa who broke away. She shivered lightly and rubbed her legs through the cloth of her thin pants.

"Are you cold?" Ryan asked, but before she could answer, he was already pulling off his hoody.

"I'm ok." Marissa answered. But after the words left her mouth he was already handing her his sweatshirt. She accepted it and smiled. "Thanks." She looked at it for a minute, reading the words "Berkley' written across the front and then slipped it over her head. It was large on her and instantly warmed her body. She tucked her knees a bit closer to her chest, and allowed the sweatshirt to cover them as well. Looking over to him she laughed. "Are you sure you will be ok. Those wife beaters don't hold in much heat." She teased him, but couldn't help but admire his arms at the same time. They were definitely a lot bigger than she had remembered.

"I'm fine." He smiled to assure her. It was cold, but he could handle it. Besides it was worth it seeing her in his clothes. He laughed at himself a bit and shook his head. Why did this seem so weird? It was as if they were meeting all over again. "So uh, did you get to talk to Summer earlier?" He wanted to know.

Marissa nodded and once again smiled. "It was really nice," she admitted but then ended there. She wasn't sure how much she should really talk about. She didn't even know how much Ryan knew, and she surely wasn't going to be the one to tell him. She was already embarrassed enough as it was that she had lost three years of her memory. It was even harder to admit it, especially knowing it was three years she had spent with him.

"She tells me we dated." Marissa looked to him, waiting to see what his reaction would be. Perhaps from it, she would be able to sense how serious they were together.

Ryan looked stunned. He wasn't expecting that at all, and if Summer had to tell her about them, did that mean that she didn't remember any of it? He wasn't sure how to react. He felt miserable; sure she remembered Summer, but she didn't remember any of his and her relationship. Quickly he looked down to his lap and shrugged. "Uh, yeah, off and on." It killed him to know that she didn't remember any of it. Sure sometimes he even wished that it would be nice to forget some of the, well not so good times, but all of it? Suddenly he felt a little sick to his stomach.

Marissa nodded and looked away as well. His look didn't really tell her anything, and his words definitely didn't either. They were exactly what Summer had told her, with no real detail. And if she thought things were awkward before, they were nothing compared to what they were now. She searched for something in her head to change the topic to, but it was like her soul wanted to know more, and fought out the awkwardness. Without even realizing it she continued, "Were we off or on when…" she trailed off, wishing immediately that she hadn't said that out loud. Maybe she shouldn't ask anything. She probably didn't need to know, it didn't matter now anyway, it was so long ago.

Ryan looked to her again. She seemed somewhat frightened, and he felt guilty if it was him that was making her feel that way. Even without finishing her question, Ryan knew what it was that she was asking. Problem was, he wasn't really sure how to answer it. Were they officially dating when Volchok had decided to run them off the road? No. But did he still love her? 100. Still, he didn't think that is what she was looking for. "When it happened, you were leaving." Ryan thought that he had answered her question well enough, but if he would look at Marissa he would realize he hadn't. But, he couldn't look at her, not for very long anyway. He didn't realize how hard this was going to be.

"Right." Marissa responded, but wasn't exactly sure what she was responding to. She was told she had been in a car accident, but she had no idea that he was driving; she was completely clueless to any of the night's events. She wanted to ask him more questions, but for some reason she held back. Was she just too scared? You would think that after all this time she would just want to know.

They both looked out towards the streets, and from behind the tips of the furthest buildings, a glow continued to form as the sun began to rise. The silence between them was both awkward and nerve racking. Marissa wished she felt more comfortable, and Ryan longed for it to go away. Out of the corner of his eyes, Ryan glanced at Marissa, but it seemed now she couldn't even look his way. He sighed lightly.

Marissa longed for more information. Why was she feeling the way she was feeling, and what had happened between them? She didn't even know how they had started let alone how they ended or anything in between. She rubbed her legs again as a chill, not from the breeze but from within, continued to maker her shiver. She took a deep breath, getting enough courage to ask him more. But instead of what she really wanted to ask coming out of her mouth, something else did. "I can't believe Seth and Summer are dating." She turned to him and laughed, but not directly meeting his eyes this time. "How did that happen?"

Ryan exhaled with relief. He was sure that she was about to ask another serious question, one Ryan wouldn't know how to answer. "That was definitely interesting. Be glad you don't remember." He laughed and shook his head. Thinking she would laugh along with his statement. He turned to face her, but instead of seeing a smile, Marissa just looked away. "I didn't mean…"

"It's ok." Marissa quickly answered. She knew that he didn't mean it the way it came off, but what he didn't realize was Marissa would kill to remember anything from that time.

Ryan felt like the biggest jack ass on the face of the earth. He continued to watch her, and saw her raise her hand to wipe away a single tear that had formed in the corner of her eye. Without thinking, Ryan reached over and placed his hand lightly on her leg, trying to give her comfort.

Marissa felt her leg heat up, and instantly to follow her entire body warmed. She turned her head back around and looked at him. Suddenly no more words needed to be spoken. She smiled softly to him, and to her surprise he smiled back.

The sun had risen just enough now to peak over top of the buildings, and as Ryan looked at Marissa, the rays hit her face perfectly. He couldn't help but think that she looked like an angel. He didn't want to have to speak any more. He knew he would just mess up again. Instead, he just wanted to show her that he loved her, and that he was there for her. And he thought, by the look that she gave him, she understood. He leaned a little bit closer, not thinking of anything else. To him, she was the same Marissa he had always known, her memory was in tact, and they were sharing a moment. No one and nothing else mattered.

But unfortunately for Marissa, she wasn't the same person she always was. She had a new life, and didn't remember her old one. For a few more moments, they continued to stare at each other. Their gazes locked into one another, and once more Marissa felt like she didn't want to blink, for fear of breaking it. She felt as if Ryan was moving forward towards her when suddenly she jumped. Her cell phone, set on vibrate had gone off in the pocket of her pants.

When she jumped, Ryan blinked and pulled back. What was he doing? What had he almost done?

Marissa pulled the phone out of her pocket and read the word 'Bray' on the caller ID. He had called a few times the night before while they were at dinner, but she had ignored them all. And just like the others she hit the ignore button again. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean…"

"No of course." Ryan spoke and moved his body away from her. Suddenly he could feel all the affects of the rising sun, and he felt extremely hot. He was both thankful and at the same time extremely perturbed by the interruption. Once again he found himself torn and confused when it came to Marissa Cooper. He knew that he couldn't do this, she barely knew who he was, and things could never be the same between them. He had just gotten caught up in the moment.

Marissa wasn't sure what had just happened. Was he going to kiss her, or was she just imagining it? Suddenly she felt guilty because she realized she had wanted him to kiss her. But why? She didn't understand these feelings or where they were coming from. She felt them in her heart, but they didn't make any sense in her head at all. All of the words her mother had told her of the past, mixed in with what Summer had told her, all entwined with her emotions that she didn't understand was making her nutty. She knew Summer was telling her the truth, but she didn't know enough of that truth yet. And she couldn't help but feel weird, seeing how she had believed her mother for so long. She didn't know what to do, but after this moment she knew she needed to know more, and needed to know it very quickly.

"I… I should probably go and take this call." She held up her cell phone, indicating what she was referring to and started to move to get up.

"Yeah ok." Ryan responded, not looking at her again. "Jet lag. I should get some more sleep."

Marissa nodded and they both stood up. Not realizing how close they were together, they were shocked as they stood and their bodies brushed against one another. They paused and met each others looks for just a moment and then Marissa quickly turned around and retreated back into her room.

Ryan stood there staring at her as she walked away, his hearth heavy with sorrow and confusion. Perhaps, he thought, he shouldn't have come. After she had gone inside he took a deep breath. He sat back down and let it out slowly. Who was he kidding? He wasn't going to be able to sleep again.

Inside Marissa took a deep breath and leaned up against the door to the balcony. She looked to her phone and shook her head. She flipped it open, but instead of checking the multiple number of voice mails she had waiting for her, she pressed the off button and shut her phone down. She didn't want it going off again. Moving over to the bed once more she sat on the edge and let her breath out. She looked at the clock again, it was almost 6:00 am, she knew she wouldn't be able to go back to sleep, but she couldn't go back outside right now either. Laying back down she sighed, she would just lay there until someone else awoke, and then she would ask Summer to help her make sense of all of this.


End file.
